Image is mine
So for this week's #hiveGhana prompt on relationship regarding the way to our heart, and what we look out for in a prospective partner, I am basically going to speak on behalf of my single brothers and sisters because as their Chairperson and lady in charge of the God when association, why not?
Now! the thing with relationship is mutualism, I like my relationship to be a symbiotic one. You know it gives me some sense of security knowing that I am not being used or taken for granted.
I am nobody's mumu and nobody is my mumu because my partner is matching my effort.
When I look out for a prospective partner, first things first that attracts me is their looks, then their body build. They should not be stick thin or short because I don't want my boyfriend looking like my son or my baby brother. Dress sense is also another thing that I look at and also calmness and composure.
Then I also look at the following on a grander scale;
INTELLIGENCE
An intelligent partner is one I'd like to see as been intellectually and emotionally sound.
A partner that can hold a valid conversation in all aspects of life, a partner that communicates, a partner that understands my silence.
A partner that I know the moment my brain stops working, he's picking off where I left off and is assuring me we can fix it and I also will be this partner to my better half.
One thing with an intelligent partner is that, they are emotionally available because they understand the need for companionship. Unless maybe you are the third link in the relationship, the tag along or the side piece.
clears throat and blink eyes
Intelligent partners do not leave you hanging or date you for convenience. They know what it means to be committed.
KINDNESS
Intelligence brings me to kindness. Kindness is the reason why we coexist.
Have you ever been with an unkind partner? I can never forget the day I heard a customer tell his girlfriend he's going to be beat her up for stressing him when they get home. He repeated that line severally but that was not the shocker. The shocker was this girl still entered his car and followed him home knowing fully well he would beat her up.
A kind partner no matter the provocation should never lay hands on me and that is where compassion comes in, they should rather walk away than go in a boxing tournament with me.
MONEY
Love is sweet, but with finance love is sweeter.
What is relationship when you guys cannot afford to do the basic things together? I mean you are with someone and you both are struggling that even to drink garri together becomes a luxury.
You will never know how frustrating life is, until you date someone that the both of you resides in rock bottom.
For me, I want my partner to be ahead of me financially. I always tell two struggling people to avoid dating themselves because if any of you fall, who does the raising?
At a point in ones life, relationship becomes a distraction. That point when you are trying to take that next big step especially when you and your partner do not share in the same foresight.
At that point, for me, I'd rather be alone, achieve what I want to achieve and then go back to my partner I had left behind.
Of course I do not hope or expect to meet him in the same state that I had left him otherwise, and if he's with someone else, then is to face front and move forward.
Thank you for coming to TEDtalk 🙂