I never believed in love while growing up. Maybe it was due to the kind of way I was corrected by my parents.
“Where are my real parents?!” I once asked my mum amidst tears after I was given some lashes of a cane one day when I misbehaved.
Well, I got more lashes when I asked that question. I should have known better that typical Nigerian parents are not to be questioned.
I guess that was why I got carried away when I heard this boy say to me “Hey girl, I like you.”
I was just in my fifth year of high school.
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Walking down along the school lawn, with my backpack strapped at my back, giving a tight grip to my red top over my pink Flare skirt which was our school uniform by the way; I picked up a fallen branch of a tree, while picking at it, lost in thought.
“Dinma wait!” That voice accompanied by hurried footsteps seemed familiar and all shades of emotions gushed over me- anxiety being the prevailing feeling.
“He’s coming!” I whispered to myself. “Comport yourself Dinma! Don't feel too flustered” I continuously told myself till he stopped in front of me.
I lifted my head slowly and my eyes were met with a tall-looking, dark-skinned lanky boy with the most beautiful smile I'd ever seen. I was entranced till I felt him hold my hand.
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“You've been avoiding me,” he said
I was mute and I chose to be rather than opening my lips and embarrassing myself.
Anyway, I got to know his name was Solomon and he had just recently joined our school and he was in his sixth year.
You know how they always tell us in lower classes not to date those in higher classes because “dem go leave you” (that is, they will abandon you after they graduate)
Solomon was so nice. He did well to always wait for me every morning before 8:00 am while I dressed up. However, he stayed so far from my gate in any case my Dad saw him.
We were the envy of the whole school. We rarely stayed apart from each other except during classes.
He offered to tutor me on subjects that I found difficult to understand and trust me I understood them faster than when my teachers taught them in class.
I had a small mobile phone my dad gave me for easy communication and with that, our love knew no distance. I easily sneaked out of the house just to be with my beloved and all we did was to say sweet nothings in each other's ear while we held hands. He never tried to touch me inappropriately but made sure to make me feel safe.
You know the saying, “Before Abraham, Jesus Was” (Meaning we can't be smarter than our elders). Unknown to me, My parents had been monitoring my silent late-night calls and also my absent-mindedness - my thoughts revolved around Solomon.
One joyful morning, with hands entwined, I and Solomon joyfully walked on our way to school.
“Is that not your dad I see in front?” Solomon said while freaking out, still holding my hands.
Without thinking twice I forcefully untangled my hands and took to flight.
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The only place I could run to was home.
“How many times have I warned you to stay away from boys?!” my dad thundered facing me while I stood behind the biggest couch in the sitting room.
My mom was obviously not going to help matters and as such I didn't dare to look to her for help. To make matters worse, she joined my dad to emphasize how many times she had caught me sneaking out of the house.
I got the beating of my life that day.
On the evening of that same day, I was asked to get some plantains from the market close by, and on my way out, I met my boyfriend, Solomon standing outside my gate. I quickly held his hands and dragged him towards the market.
“Have you been here all day?!” I inquired since he was still wearing his uniform with his backpack strapped to his back.
“Ye..Yes,” He stammered. “I was worried about you! Are you hurt anywhere?”
I looked into his eyes and tears poured down mine. All I saw was a boy who loved me without restraints.
He pulled me into a hug and told me everything would be okay.
It felt like all the pains I had felt earlier that day just left in an instant.
He later left for home after I assured him that I was okay.
The following months were blissful until I received the shock of my life.
“Dee, I'm going to be joining my mom in the United Kingdom next month,” Solomon said to me.
I had always known that his Mother was not living in Nigeria. He however lived here with his Dad. His parents were divorced.
But according to him, his mom has been asking him to come over so he could further his education over there.
And finally, his dad had agreed.
I didn't know which to accept, his leaving or the distance that would be created between us.
I would surely miss him but I had to let him go. I cried without consolation. I did well to avoid him in school so as not to ignite my emotions anytime I saw his face. He did well to respect my wishes.
On the day he was to leave for the United Kingdom, he sent me a text to come see him off.
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That message was like a sharp knife piercing through my heart. I felt so much pain that my mom had to allow me to express my emotions even though she didn't know the cause of my tears.
I wasn't brave enough so I let my love go. It wasn't the best decision but it was the best for me. Maybe I was selfish but I indeed loved him.
