REFLECTIONS ON ELDERLY CARE

in #hive-1538509 days ago

Caring for people is not an easy task and it most times, involves too many times when those people who care for them will have to feel hurt while at it. Caring for older persons is even a bit more challenging because it is assumed that, as people grow older, they tend to become like their younger self and you can imagine how hard taking of child can be not to say taking care of a matured baby.

We know the challenges that come with older people especially our older women. As women grow older, they enter the phase we call menopause. This is a phase that no matter what, every woman will have to pass through this phase as long as they live on. Mind you, menopause is not a problem but then, it becomes a problem when some women have some excess symptoms and they are left untreated. Dealing with some older women can be really difficult if some of these menopausal symptoms are not managed. Mind you, there are other reasons but this reason play a crucial role in women’s behavior.

During this phase of life for women, these women tend to have hormonal imbalance, temporary loss of memory and so on. And these symptoms are most times responsible for the behavior they often times display. And as for the men, it is also possible to find them become more intolerant as they grow older because there are also some hormonal changes, memory loss, others and naturally, they are both humans and they will still want to remind us that they know better than us even when we obviously know better than them now.

So based on this little reason, I won’t really mind staying with older people but then, I won’t want to overlook some of the disadvantages of having them around. If they do more harm to my mental health and also that of my children, I will prefer to have people take even better care of them. That way, they will have a better chance of living longer and enjoy the fruit of their labor. For some days or weeks or months, I will always do well to pay them a visit with most of the family, to them and have fun with them. That way, they will always value our company and cherish it even better.

They will always look forward for having us coming around and I believe, this will also help them live even longer. To me, it is not us staying with these older persons that matters, what matters is the effect staying with them has on both us or even on them. If the disadvantages are more, I will prefer to take care of them even better by hiring the best hands take good care of them and make sure to visit them as often as possible. Meanwhile, in some cases, some older people especially those ones that are honest with themselves, know that staying with their children at old age might be really too much for them, so they always try to lead a healthy lifestyle so they won’t end up giving their children too many problems.

But then, not all older people are like that, some will even blackmail you emotionally just to make you feel guilty of not allowing them live with you under the same roof. But then, like I said, we should always make sure to weigh the options carefully, if not we might end up having the worst memories of our older family members at old age. So we having money to afford a better care for them should be something that will help both the children and the parents. But then, as much as it’s possible, we should make them see the reasons why it is better this way so they won’t feel neglected.

The only time when you are allowed to make this decision on your own is when you can’t communicate with them due to their attitude or reaction towards things, if not, it is necessary to always communicate your plans for them with them as it concerns them. If not, that on its own might stir up strife in the home because those older people might end up feeling not loved and neglected despite all they have done for us,

This is what I have to say to this, bearing in mind that I will also be an older person someday as long as I live and this is an opportunity for me to start shaping my life in a way that won’t give my children or anyone so much troubles trying to take care of me. But if peradventure I still end up not leading a healthy lifestyle, it is certain that I might only bring people more problems when I get older after I retire and the truth is, I will still end up suffering more for it.

Thanks for stopping by. ❤️

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Hey there, Hopey. Our elderly ones, particularly our parents, should be given special treatments when they grow old and are unable to do things properly. Considering how they cared for us when we were younger, they deserve to enjoy undiluted love, care and support. You know, the cycle of life is interesting. When we were babies, our parents take care of us, but the tables change when they grow old. We become their caregivers.

Wow! So much attached to the menopause stage. Thanks to you, I have learnt something new today. As you mentioned, taking care of people can be difficult, particularly older people. Both options are good as long as whatever you choose works for you. However, it would be really great to take care of my old people in the family home.

Thanks for sharing, P.A.

That’s right. As long as our parents took good care of us, taking care of them at their old age will barely be a thing of debate. Even if they didn’t, we still can’t debate about it sometimes.

Personally, I will want to take care of my parents when they grow old because they deserve it but if need be, I will seek for help because like I said, they deserve the best. The truth is, we won’t always be there for them and at one point or another, they will always need assistance.

If you notice, I didn’t even say that part of 24/7 because it’s not even possible. And besides that, some of our parents prefer to stay in their hometown when they are old and we can’t follow them there.

I’m glad you learnt something new. Thanks for sharing your thoughts too, boss. 🥰

You are right.
We cannot always be there for them. Our children and husband will also become our priorities and juggling everything? Very difficult. If nursing homes for elderly is the best, then we should go for it.

No, nursing homes are not even part of my options. 😂

My parents will live in a home where they have everything they need and we can visit them as often as we want. 🤭

Valid. It all narrows down to whatever works for us.

Yes and also what works for our parents too. 😊

My parents are angels of salvation, so in my mind there is not the slightest intention of leaving my parents in a nursing home, even though they are old, I still try to take good care of them.

How hard it is for them to raise us from infancy to adulthood, I think when they are old the time comes for us a child to take care of us just as he took care of us from childhood.

Yeah, our parents deserves all the best treatment we can give to them. Just like you, I also don’t like the idea of taking them to a nursing home. I was referring to them choosing where they wish to be and still giving them the maximum support I can afford them.

Nursing home is a no no. Just that, sometimes we might move out of the country and they wish to stay back or we can’t afford taking them along, but that won’t mean we won’t take of them because they don’t live with us.

Thanks for sharing this! I completely agree that spending quality time with our elderly family members is essential. Being physically present isn't the only way to show affection; maintaining open conversations helps us understand their needs while also learning from their wisdom. They have so much valuable experience to share.

Yeah, having our parents around us would be a blessing to most of us and even them too.

Thanks for your input. 🥰

I have had the privilege to live with and take care of some older people, and I must say that some are very nice and understanding that you just want to sit with them always and learn from their wisdom, while some are so manipulative that they will drain you emotionally.

But in all we still have to try our best to take care of them.

Currently I know someone that is going through menopause, and I must say that it hasn't been easy on her, as she has been feeling different changes in her body.

Me allowing someone else take care of my parents doesn’t mean I won’t take care of them. Actually, I wasn’t even referring to a nursing home. It will be their home but they have people around to help them and I can always visit and help out too, every now and then.

Indeed, menopause is a thing. Too bad, in Nigeria, most mothers will feel like you are insulting them if you tell them about these things. The painful part is, they won’t be the only one to suffer for it, those around them too will get a share of it once in a while.

Thanks for your thoughtful contribution, Ozd. 🤗

Thank you too for this insightful post 🤗

You’re welcome dear.
Have a great day ahead. 🌹

🤗

Communication is indeed the key to dealing with this situation especially with our elderly, and in truth professional caregivers can help out with these tasks.

But the personal unlike you, I'll preferably have them stay with we their family, even though it has it drawback, family knows what's best and how to treat their own than an outsider would, and given the relentless effort these parents put in fending for us in our vulnerable as a child, it's best we reciprocate same than throw them out to a retirement home like they've no family members.

Oh! I will definitely take care of my parents. Whether or not they choose to live with me or not. But I will prefer they don’t live with me, there is always this joy traveling a distance to meet your parents or grandparents. 🤭

And I wasn’t referring to a nursing home when I said they can be taken care of by others. That others can be your other siblings or relatives.

Like I mentioned, you might not always be around to cater for them but that doesn’t in anyway mean you love them less or won’t care for them. I know of some old people that prefer to remain in their hometown or go to their hometown when they can’t do so much again. The truth is, you won’t want to follow them there, well you might but most of us won’t. So all we can do is make where ever they choose to be comfortable and conducive for them.

I will support you on this👍
If nursing homes with professionals are better for them, why not?

I have seen a situation whereby the mother was staying with her biological daughter not even daughter in-law but the problems she faced on each day needs to be checked and eventually they resulted in getting her a maid but this becomes worst.

Finally, she was taken to retirement home for peace to reign

That’s the sad reality that most of us refuse to accept. If our parents are good people, I don’t think we will find any problem allowing them stay with us for as long as possible or taking good care of them. Some people are not lucky but I guess most people are lucky.

Thanks for agreeing with me and understanding my point of view. 🥰

You are welcome