Family, to me, is not just a group of people related by blood, but also a source of support, love, and shared experiences. I come from a family of seven—five children , my father and mother. But then the thing is, my dad left home some months after i was born to move in with another woman so since then we were raised by our mother who single handedly raised us all by herself.
Now, if you were to ask me whether we are a large family, I would definitely say yes. Being five children in one household, with one parent managing everything, wasn’t easy. Growing up, I had to witness my mother’s resilience and strength as she worked really hard to provide for us.
I was the last child of the family and as the last child, I had the privilege of learning alot of things from my older siblings, who are mostly married now and have kids of their own. Although, things are much less stressful for my mother these days, but back when we were all younger, the struggle was real.
One major advantage of living in a large family is the cooperation it fosters. When you have many siblings, it’s easier to work together during tough times. I remember how we all had to contribute, no matter how small, to make things work and make us be in a better place.
Also, it was easy for duties to be shared—one person would handle the dishes, another would clean the house, while someone else would take care of other chores. This delegation of tasks made household responsibilities manageable and even taught us teamwork at an early age. It also built a sense of unity among us, which I deeply cherish.
However, having a large family also has its disadvantages . With limited resources, there were times when things couldn’t go around, and we all had to adjust. For instance, when food or other supplies were scarce, we had to share and manage the little that was available. Those moments taught me how to manage life with little resources, but then they weren’t always easy.
If you ask me whether I’d prefer a smaller family, I’d say it’s a tough choice. On one hand, I wouldn’t change my family for anything. They are my greatest blessing, and I love them just as they are. But part of me wonders what it would have been like to come from a smaller family, maybe with just two or three children. Fewer siblings might have made managing resources easier, and perhaps there would have been less pressure on my mother. At the same time, I wouldn’t trade the sense of camaraderie, shared memories, and the life lessons I gained from growing up in a larger family.
When I think about starting my own family someday, I know for certain that I wouldn’t want it to be large. I love kids, but realistically, I don’t think I would have the strength or the time to raise a large number of children which is why I plan to practice family planning with my spouse to have just two or three kids. For me, this is a manageable number that would allow me to provide them with the best opportunities and give them the attention and care they need to grow to become great individuals.
I know how it feels to not grow up with a present father . So I want to be fully present in my children’s lives and ensure I have the energy to nurture their growth. With a smaller family, I believe I’d be able to do that more effectively.
At the end of the day, I cherish the family I grew up in, but I also know the kind of family I’d like to build for myself in the future.
Thanks for reading.
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