Those who are kind and are said to be "kind to a fault" sometimes find themselves in situations where they are getting punished for being kind. That is one ironic thing about life. Our society would be so much better if we had more kind people in it, but those who are truly nice often get the short end of the stick. At least, that's how it seems in the short term.
For the record, if you are a kind person at that extreme level, it mostly means that you are caring, compassionate, you don't enjoy conflict, you always try to get along with people and you find it difficult to say no when you need to say it. They can't help it. They wish for everyone around them to be satisfied even the cost of their own integrity.
I don't know a lot of people like that but I've seen too many people get burnt particularly because they haven't developed the side of their character that's capable of making it known that their "NO" means NO and that they are capable of biting back when bitten by someone else.
That's certainly an aspect of people's character that makes them easy targets of bullies and this isn't just the high school bullies scenario you see in Hollywood. Nope. Even amongst interactions between people in the wider society, those who get mistreatment, manipulated disrespected, and taken for granted are usually the people who are seen as "nice".
They say "That's a nice person" but what they actually mean is that you are the sort of person they can walk all over without facing any consequences.
I'm kind and I enjoy being kind. But I've seen life for what it is. So, I know that there are preys out there who would spot that kindness as a weakness and they will try to manipulate you to doing their bidding even when it doesn't make any sense for you to be doing that.
That's also why I don't just show kindness to an extreme. I will say NO and I will get into an argument even if that's what it will take to show that I don't buy into an idea or that I won't dance to the tune of the music that someone is playing. I can even risk not having anything to do with someone anymore as far as I don't fall into the person's manipulative stunts.
There are times when I'm tempted to just agree with what someone is saying or do what the person wants me to do just because I don't want to deal with an argument or misunderstanding. It's also tempting to do that as a display of kindness, but I'm convinced that doing that would mean that I'm lying about my opinion or my choice of action.
That's another thing I wouldn't want to do. So, I choose to be kind without allowing myself to be unreasonably agreeable in the name of kindness.
Thanks For Not Missing Any Full-stop or Comma.
Thumbnail Image is taken from Unsplash
Wes & Grindan