It's 2024, the modern age, we have all sorts of solutions and advancements. Yet, abuse is on the rise, in all forms, shapes, and sizes. And by the time we learn about its whereabouts, the damage is done, and unequaled levels of trauma are instilled; whether it's the abuse of power, money, or abuse of another human being.
Was it always like this? Or is it as clear as day in the present time because people don't even try to hide it? Or have Social Media platforms managed to "expose" it all, while also being the reason which adds fuel to the fire? Social media obviously solves a few problems, but it creates a lot more than it solves. It's baffling, how Social Media can successfully show a huge percentage of the reality that goes on behind closed doors, fake smiles, and the so-called "good deeds" of fraudsters and their hoodwinked agenda. Expose culture is on the rise, and it's parabolic. But the people getting "exposed" or targeted are simply becoming the victims due to their own lives and social media exhibits.
These days it's tough to catch who the true victim is, and who's just suffering from victim mentality. We always think that we have it bad until we really ponder the matter and look around; till we finally see someone less privileged, and understand that we probably are living their dream lives. Social Media has pushed this agenda of always being happy, and how success is easily attainable. Fake houses, cars, money, and paid actors, social media gurus have been milking this method for over a decade now. And we, the "common people" are trying a bit too hard to turn it into reality. Forcefully putting a smile on our faces, buying clothes and devices we can't afford, just for a few likes on Social Media; while completely ignoring the matter that requires our immediate attention.
Yes, it may seem like I'm moving away from the topic of victimhood and abuse, but give it some time, and you'll know how it all fits.
A friend of mine is working on finalizing his divorce, or should I say both friends?
Even though my buddy and I got way back, almost 15 years ago, I only got to know his wife after their marriage, but we became friends quite quickly. She is a jolly girl, and the guy is a smart and honest person, but he is lazy. They got married half a decade ago, and have a 2-year-old son now. Sadly, what looked to be a power couple then, was only just for show on social media.
What went on behind closed doors, especially two years into the marriage, was beyond me. If you saw them on Social Media, you would believe that they were inseparable, but it was quite the opposite. And by the time they came to me with their issues or anyone else they had trusted, it was already too late. Honestly speaking, whether it be me, who's a dear friend, or the best psychiatrist in the world, none could save this marriage.
At the start of their relationship, the girl would do anything to please the guy. Expensive gifts on the regular, financial support, and whatnot. The guy took it for granted and used all that money and material to show off on social media and create a fake lifestyle. He really wasn't interested in creating value for himself or adding value to his family.
I realized that the relationship was completely transactional, a matter of give and take; which surely isn't sustainable. And when the girl couldn't afford to buy her man the things he wanted, abuse was the answer. It only pushed her away, and soon even she started to answer with violence and abuse in return. I did try and work as a medium to try and cool things off, but the man only cared about material and being lazy, and the girl wanted love; which she would never get. If only they had gotten a divorce or at least taken care of the drama before the child came into the picture. Alas, in the middle of both these juvenile parties, the child suffered. The parents are still young, they will figure something out. All I'm worried about is the child and his vague future.
Whether it's physical abuse or mental, these days most relationships are just temporary mind games; especially when both parties are young. You eat out each other's brain for a few months and leave a scar that won't be healed as easily. It's really not love they're looking for, they're mistaking their lust and hunger for love.
Even if a well-wisher may have a good suggestion or solution, the chances are that no one's ready to hear or apply it these days. Because everyone is a know-it-all, and they make their own rules. People can be dumb, they can be smart, and you'll find a bunch of these people, who are both; to an extent.
We don't need people to be more cunning, what we need is understanding, empathy, and wisdom...
