I started grazing on this topic in my last post, though wrote this one for the group I’m taking a Human Design / Gene Keys / I Ching course with - so pardon any overlap or repetition; though it is my intention that this might be less of a ‘rant/vent’ and more of a ‘reflection’ and potential conversation starter, with greater clarity…
Dylan’s been frequently referring to the Dragon Year theme, emphasizing 2024 as a time of potent opportunities for phoenix-like rises. And in a FANTASTIC recent podcast he did with Kathi, sorta expanded on the theme with the topic of “thrones.” (Highly recommend listening to that one if haven’t already.)
There’s been some puzzling responses arising with both… though observing it as a likely byproduct of the mind’s framing & expectations, while still in process of deconditioning old programs that’d interpret the concepts in the framework of grandiose ambition - versus a far more subtler wisdom that’s been emerging over time.
Like, the proposition of ‘spectacular rises & breakthroughs’ has stoked expectations of extraordinary superhuman feats & ego-gratifying “successes” - mind jumping to expectations of what it might look like, specifically in regards to quantum leaps with either writing or music, in my case; it’s had trouble envisioning what else my particular ‘manifestations’ of such grandness could even materialize as, after so many years prioritizing those two activities as the foundational pillars of self-image. But it hasn’t felt like anything’s gonna pop off with either that’d satisfy those expectations of ego. And it feels like focus in that direction would still kinda be tainted with egoic “trying to prove” and trying to force old ideas of “should” with misaligned motivations/intentions.
Similarly, the podcast dialogue - though very resonant at certain points and highly potent - stirred many preconceptions of what that ultimate, ‘superior,’ ‘higher’ state of “being on one’s throne” might look like or entail. There were some big trigger points at moments as seeing reflections, as though being called out, of where I have been “playing small” - while also some other interesting, unexpected triggers observed as recognizing engagement with a presupposition that I’m not already on my throne. It took a moment to step back and question: what if I actually am flowering as per the opportunities of the Dragon Year perfectly fit to my unique design and ”on my throne” - but not fully recognizing it because it doesn’t look like what mind & ego expect and/or the inevitable emotional waves might convince them otherwise?
No doubt, the true Florescence of our wiser, more mature selves is bound to look & feel a bit differently than the grandiose aspirations of youthful ego. And while the not-yet-fully-deconditioned mind might interpret the rhetoric of “dragons” and “thrones” dramatically, our journey through the Gene Keys so far probably ought to have provided enough insight into the fact that rising from the shadows into Gifts & Siddhi’s might not be entirely as exciting & sexy as thought. With my personality Sun in 52.6, the prospect of RESTRAINT & STILLNESS definitely doesn’t conform, after all, lol.
Granted, I see/recognize the Jupitarian-Gemini duality at play in the responses - not ‘either/or,’ but both. In some ways, I might still be “playing small;” in others, I might already be “on my throne” - although that doesn’t look like a “happily-ever-after” fantasy mind might expect where everything’s smooth & easy; we are still human, after all; nor does kingdom/queendom come without their own challenges. And as per Dylan’s excellent mini-assessment of my split definition in class last month, it may be expected for there to be “splits” in my state at times where the Peace/Anger side of the 12-22 Manifestor side isn’t always in congruence with the Satisfaction/Frustration of the Generator side - and those emotional waves will always continue. And though the mind might quickly jump to conclusions when in the lows of those emotional waves - the Individual spikes being the most extreme of the three types, and perhaps accentuated with personality Mars & Mercury in Gate 15 of Extremes - that such states “must” be indicative of not “being on my throne,” perhaps there’s bits of truth & falsehood in both sides. (That inescapable yin-yang duality, yet again.)
I’d done the extreme of the grandiose ambitions; and while I may have since swung to an opposite polarity, almost to the point of “if there’s nothing to prove (with undefined ego, perhaps compounded with the shadow frequency of 52’s collective pressure to do & achieve), then why even bother striving for ‘greatness’ and keep stuck in that ‘never enough’ paradigm,” there might be the risk of “throwing baby out with bathwater” with the latter. Yet, also comes increasing awareness through the longer-term process of that whole ”no choice” bit. Mind & ego might still have their ideas of what Dragon Year ascents and “the throne” would look like or ’ought to be’ - though perhaps the moments of feeling as though “it’s not happening,” “stuckness,” etc. are merely the consequences of those beliefs, expectations, “spells,” etc… versus full surrender to what wants to come through us. Yet more lessons in releasing control (maybe an extra big one for me, with my body/design Sun in Gate 21 of Control - and living close to that astrocartography Sun line.) As Rudd stated for Gate 52:
“You can never really be stuck; you just aren’t accepting where your rhythm is.” ~ The Pulse
But enough on my experience with this… now curious to hear more from others.
How have some of you been observing & moving through this “Dragon Year” energy and reconciling any similar gaps between mind/ego’s expectations of what it ought to look like and how it actually is unfolding… uniquely * perfectly fit to your design?
What’s come up for you as listening to that podcast on the topic of “thrones?” Have you felt like you’re already on yours, and if so, what is that experience like? If not, why not - and what have you felt are the key reasons you haven’t yet claimed and are living from it? Etc, etc.
Do share… 🙂🙏
