And achieve your goals ?
Does anxiety increase when you are more mindful and reduce when you are relaxed ? Is anxiety related to stress ? Can you sleep like him at any time, any place ? Who are those people who either do not have any anxiety or full control over their anxiety ? These are some tough questions that keeps hunting me on a daily basis, and this weeks kiss-145 prompt is a perfect opportunity to discuss this topic.
Goals are what kicks us for living the life, and again there are long term goals, which keeps changing at times, at least for middle class people like us. One can say, Happiness is the ultimate goal, but it's not that simple to live a happy life, unless you have achieved everything you wanted very early (does it end actually ? ) or you are detached from everything. Detachment (or non-attachment) is the key to overcome suffering, but is extremely difficult to attain in family life. It becomes very late till we understand that material success is really not worth at all, and we try to enjoy that. The easier path is renunciation or sannyasa, leading a holy life - free from lust, craving and desires. That is the reason, we saw some very young people (even some very rich girls) becoming saints at very early age at this year's Kumbh Mela. But that also needs a lot of courage and understanding the true meaning of life from a very early stage, which is rare. So we don't fall into any of these categories and for us, mindfully avoiding the anxieties is the only means to live a healthy life, which is the first step in peaceful living.
To avoid letting the anxieties of others affect our daily life is not that easy as well, because when you live in a family, others have expectation from you. You have to take care of your parents, your in-laws, your immediate family, and of course yourself. Setting the right expectation is the key to fulfill your duty towards them, and I am talking about only what you can do - not what they will do. Often we expect others to do certain things and unfortunately, it does not always work the way we expect. As we grow older, we realize to stop expecting and focus only on what we can do - it's like living like a saint inside your own house. We continue doing our duty and guiding them the best, but everything beyond that needs to be accepted. And then keeping aside some dedicated time for us, to understand and execute what makes us happy. So over the time, I have found out that doing the morning work out ( in any form) for a hour starts my day better. And I try to plan the day's activity, even though that's not fully in my control. As the day progress, I tend to slow down towards evening (so that my anxieties can reduce to the fullest), to be able to have some better sleep. In the process of analyzing myself, I find, I should mindfully avoid letting the anxieties of others affect me only till evening. From there, I should relax and try not to be mindful, because being mindful is like creating anxiety, and that spoils the night's sleep.
How do you deal with this in your everyday life ? Does things always works the way you plan ?
I would love to hear and learn from other's perspective from the hive family. And now let me put some light on the photograph.
In an unfortunate event, I went to a nearby hospital at 4 am, and these people were sleeping in the reception area. I was wondering how they are able to sleep at such a place, that is when the security guards asked them to get up and clear the space.
Within half an hour, the area was being cleaned by their staff.
Some people went and sat, and some did not hesitate to sleep.
But he was free of all anxieties taking a nice sleep - his relatives must have been in the hospital, but still he can control that anxiety - a lesson to learn.
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