[EN/PT-BR] When I'm the worst reason to push people away.

in #hive-153850last month

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A moment to reflect with my friends at Hive, taking advantage of the subject provided by Hive Learners that is very much my style, but unfortunately in a negative way. Not everything is rosy, not everything works out in our life, so, in my past I have some bad moments that I ended up going through with some friends, or rather, ex-friends currently and that are one of my ghosts that haunt me to this day in parts.

Of course, with the maturity I have today, I don't let it shake me too much, but I also recognize that with the lack of positive ideas in my head, the lack of a present father perhaps or just immaturity, I let many good people go from my life because of simple stupid mistakes I made. I always say that I'm not ashamed to admit my mistakes, some people are proud of that, but I'm calm about it, I admit that I was always a bit childish in my adolescence and I can say that it was only when I was about 25 years old that I started to become more mature with respect and politeness towards people.

So, the worst reason why someone I have ever met in this life had to leave, cutting off the bonds of friendship, was simply me! That's right! My persona irrational, stupid and immature of the past. The reasons were the silliest: lost games, messages on social networks, misheard conversations, I simply entered a state of unstoppable anger, cursed people and that was it, friendships were broken. Misunderstandings and things I heard from others are a catastrophe in life, speculation, gossip and I didn't even have the maturity to seek the truth, so with that I ended up offending people, fighting and having very complicated and sad moments.

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I remember a lot of the fights on MSN, which was what we had at that time, with Orkut, the first social network of all times. Today, when I stop to think and see how childish I was and how I let such simple things become real storms, I feel regret and even shame. Therefore, today, I always value education and respect and I really like talking to people before making any decision or judgment, because I am living proof that a comma in the wrong place can end years of friendship and, what's more, The ugly thing about all this was that I interpreted things wrongly.

So the price of these bad attitudes was precisely losing good people, friendships that could have lasted until today, some people who could even be here at Hive with me because they had an open mind, awareness of things and I believe they would give it a chance if I explained how everything works. Anyway, with all this I learned that a moment of anger and emotional loss of control, especially over silly things, can ruin an entire friendship and it took me a long time to change and understand that.

In my life, the vast majority of people who left were not necessarily for reasons such as betrayal or romantic affection, they were undone by my actions, so that is the biggest reason I can say for having to see them leave. With the experience I have today, I talk a lot with my children so that they don't let cell phones, games or other stupid things affect the friendships they have, because that's exactly what I went through, so I don't want them to make the same mistakes I did. I committed. Loneliness is never good company.

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Um momento para refletir com meus amigos da Hive, aproveitando do assunto disponibilizado pela Hive Learners que é bem a minha cara, mas infelizmente para o lado negativo. Nem tudo é flores, nem tudo dá certo na nossa vida, então, no meu passado tenho alguns momentos ruins que acabei passando com alguns amigos, ou melhor, ex-amigos atualmente e que são um dos meus fantasmas que me assombram até hoje em partes.

Claro que com a maturidade que tenho hoje, não deixo isso me abalar muito, mas, também reconheço que com a falta de ideias positivas na cabeça, a falta de um pai presente talvez ou apenas imaturidade, deixei muitas pessoas legais irem embora da minha vida por simples erros idiotas que cometi. Sempre falo que não tenho vergonha de assumir meus erros, têm pessoas orgulhosas com isso, mas estou tranquilo a isso, assumo que sempre fui meio infantil na adolescência e posso dizer que apenas lá para uns 25 anos de idade que comecei a me tornar mais maduro com o respeito e educação com as pessoas.

Então, o pior motivo pelo qual alguém que eu já conheci nessa vida, teve que ir embora, cortando os laços de amizade, foi simplesmente eu! Isso mesmo! A minha persona irracional, besta e imatura do passado. Os motivos foram dos mais bobos: partidas perdidas em jogos, recados em redes sociais, conversas mal ouvidas, eu simplesmente entrava em um estado de raiva imparável, xingava as pessoas e pronto, amizades desfeitas. Mal entendidos e coisas que eu ouvia de terceiros são uma catástrofe na vida, especulações, fofocas e eu nem mesmo tive a maturidade para ir buscar a verdade, então com isso acabei por ofender as pessoas, brigar e ter momentos bem complicados e tristes.

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Lembro muito das brigas no MSN, que era o que tínhamos naquela época, com o Orkut, a primeira rede social de todos os tempos. Hoje, quando paro para pensar e vejo como fui infantil e como deixei coisas tão simples se tornarem verdadeiras tempestades, me bate um arrependimento e até mesmo vergonha. Por isso, hoje, prezo sempre por educação e respeito e gosto muito de conversar com as pessoas antes de tomar qualquer decisão ou julgamento, porque sou prova viva de que uma vírgula no lugar errado, pode acabar com amizades de anos e o que é mais feio nisso tudo, foi que eu interpretava as coisas erradas.

Então o preço dessas atitudes ruins foi justamente perder pessoas legais, amizades que poderiam estar durante até hoje, algumas pessoas que poderiam até estar aqui na Hive comigo porque elas tinham uma mente aberta, consciência das coisas e acredito que dariam uma chance se eu explicasse como tudo funciona. Enfim, com tudo isso aprendi que um momento de raiva e descontrole emocional, ainda mais por bobeiras, pode estragar toda uma amizade e demorei muito para mudar e entender isso.

Na minha vida, a grande maioria das pessoas que foram embora não foram necessariamente por motivos como traição ou afetos amorosos, foram desfeitas por minhas atitudes, então isso é o que posso dizer de maior motivo de ter que ver elas partirem. Com a experiência que tenho hoje, converso muito com meus filhos para não deixarem celulares, jogos ou outras coisas mais bestas afetarem as amizades que eles possuem, por ser justamente por isso que passei, sendo assim, não quero que eles cometam os mesmos erros que cometi. A solidão nunca é uma boa companhia.

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O bom é que com as porradas que a vida dá, a gente vai aprendendo a se tornar uma pessoa melhor!

Exatamente, eu errei muito no meu passado e por isso sou uma pessoa mais solitária, mas com o tempo aprendi muita coisa, que o respeito vem em primeiro lugar. E também conheci a hive, com um monte de gente legal, uma segunda chance na minha vida rs.

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I remember one girlfriend broke up with me by text message on my birthday... The good old days! Teach your kids well to be careful what they send by text message, it can come back to bite you if you aren't careful!
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Wow, that was a tough one, that must have been a painful blow... but it's the kind of attitude I used to have, not of this caliber, but from things I've done similarly, so I've learned a lot in my life that it's not so nice to do that. 😆

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