They say you never know the value of a well or river until it runs dry. I've gotten mildly ill these past few days and the "voltage" of my system has dropped drastically, especially within the first hours of the onset of the illness.
If there's a picture in mind for this experience, then it's probably a deflating balloon losing its air or a dimming lightbulb as its power source suddenly gets disrupted.
In a way, I see it as falling from grace and visiting this state in which you have to confront your own limitations, specifically the ones you tend to overlook.
As humans, to say we're always deluded is a mild way of putting it, I'll say we're constantly deluded on our abilities, between what we can and cannot do. Perhaps, unawareness is a better term than delusion.
In my own case, I tend to be very practical when I get ill. Like what is the source of the problem and what are the possible ways to get it fixed? How long is it going take and how can I get back to the bare minimum health required to do the basic tasks before I fully recover?
Keeping Some Form Of Normality
What I appreciate about this attitude is it prevents my mind from going all over the place, making conjectures and wild speculations. Instead, now it is busy crafting a plan based on the above mentioned practicalities, which helps maintain a sense of control and structure, even if the ultimate purpose of that structure has shifted.
Needless to say, I think being ill, specifically when it is just mild with relatively less pain can be therapeutic. I'm not sure how to really put it into words but this state of consciousness is just different from my ordinary state of consciousness when I'm just fine. The former is lightweight, expansive, you get a glimpse of the bigger picture and have access to insights that seem otherworldly.
Interestingly, it's not uncommon for me to be super creative when I get ill. Lying in bed, half awake, half asleep, jumping from one thought form to another in a seemingly free-flowing manner.
The tragedy however, is that when I finally fall asleep and then become awake, this creativity and expanded awareness often disappears, and even recalling the memory of it can be hard if not impossible.
But I'm thinking if I could find a way to port this state of consciousness into my ordinary state of consciousness, even if it's just a tip of it, then I'll probably 10X my productivity, creativity and overall well-being.
Thanks for reading!! Share your thoughts below on the comments.
