Gates 2/1 have been a trip. Though perhaps as when travelling, actual immersion in the culture provides an entirely different depth of experience than simply being a tourist passing through, what better way to learn this stuff than actually dive in to the full experience itself, versus merely reading/listening to information about it… ☰☰☯️☷☷
On day 1 or 2, there was this BIG observation that captured my attention while contemplating my Body/Design Venus 2.3 (+ moon 14.5 completing the channel) along with the Shadows of Dislocation/Entropy, Gifts of Orientation/Freshness, and Siddhis of Unity/Beauty. Perhaps swayed into not-self upon reading Rudd’s poetic take on the Gift, “experiencing life in more magical & mystical dimensions…” there’ve been years that was true, but it’s been a whiiiiiiiiile since I’ve fully felt that way. So mind doubted, tempted to assume I must’ve slipped back into & gotten stuck in the shadow. But was that TRUE, or merely the mind’s IDEA of what (Dis)Orientation is & isn’t - mind/ego measuring against fairytale-esque ideals? Meanwhile… did the BODY feel Dislocated, angry, frustrated, disoriented, disconnected? NO. I was fascinated & perplexed by the disparity, and Mind seemed intent on understanding & reconciling this. ’Could it actually be that Body/Design IS in its correct Orientation, while Personality/Mind oscillates in & out of the shadows? The Body seemed at Peace & Satisfied, while it was the MIND toiling away… do the two actually HAVE TO be 100% on the same page if in the Gift state - or can there be such a split, with UNITY only finally occurring at the Siddhi level? (And how might the nature of an emotional authority’s waves factor into what might SEEM like Dislocation at times?)’
I felt fixated by/with this. While questioning, “is this still the 24 shadows of Addictive-loops and 44 Interference, obscuring the Receiving (24) of Direction (2 Gift) as Lost (2 repressive shadow) in MIND? The Body seemed Peaceful & Satisfied for the most part - here in the soothingly-quiet mountains, having followed Strategy & Authority to what & where seems correct; though is the unrest of Mind/Personality reflected in Body at a level I’ve been unconscious to, as the Body/Design moreso IS? To what degree is this ‘split’ between the two sides at forefront of awareness itself a perfect fractal embodiment of DISLOCATION? If so, how damn unconscious & disoriented AM I to be gaslighting myself to think otherwise? OR is the Body/Design in its Orientation, the magic far more subtle & simplistic - living on its/my own terms, financially independent, tucked away in a peaceful 5-star hermit cave with snowboarding literally in my back yard - while Mind/Personality too distorted to 100% recognize it, thinking “magical & mystical” ‘ought to’ involve daily rainbows, unicorns, tigers jumping through fire hoops, model-calibre Asian girls catering to ego’s every desire, ever-increasing dopamine peaks, with everything all-amazing all-the-time as projected from self-appointed ‘manifestation gurus’’ & ‘influencers’ Instagram/TikTok highlight reels? Must I be completely free of all conditioning that’d set such benchmarks before coming into the Gift of aligned Orientation in BOTH Body/Design and Personality - or is the extreme hermitude of my current ‘on the roof’ chapter actually perfectly correct as it is, and at least the Body/Design Oriented where it ‘needs to / should’ be irregardless of what messes Personality may still dip into through the process of deconditioning and its emotional waves? OR are these inquiries still the Gate 24 shadow at play, attempting to rationalize Dislocation evident via the obvious disparity between Body & Personality states?”
Of course, as per GeneKey 1 shadow, life never will be 100% on - and it’s only through resisting that one slips into Depression/Entropy/Dislocation. But that damn undefined ajna wants its certainty as though Truth is fixed. And another key observation this week: Truth isn’t always as fixed as Mind would like. In spite of some expectation that this worked as though we simply rise from Shadow to Gift and we’re all good to go, it seemed to become more apparent that ‘we’ may always be in flux, to some degree, at some level - oscillating back & forth, as though one foot in each state; not ONE clear particle-state, but the quantum wave spanning both possibilities at once - that single particle-state not fixed, but perhaps refreshed in each moment, dependent on focus. Thus, how Body/Design Venus 2.3 could feel at Peace overlooking the valley & sunset, Mind to jump into its Dislocation a fraction of second later, only to find Satisfaction the next moment as the Repeating (24) contemplations finally unveiled insights - that individual mutative energy - streamed into Fresh (1 Gift) & Inventive (24 Gift) articulations in written form… and rinsed, and Repeated. NOT the static, “we’ve arrived in the Gift so it’s happy-ever-after,” as mind thought, but continual dance of yin & yang transforming between Shadow, Gift and Siddhi states, oscillations of the waves encompassing them ALL. (And Mind’s conclusions that ‘must be’ in shadow, merely that resistance to the natural ebbs & flows, fixating on & judging the ebbs.) ☯️
Some of this got into writing and was shared here yesterday. However, some feedback sent in private revealed it had been incomplete. An upon listening to the Gate 2 module like the 12th time, only to hear in it for the first that disharmony between Body/Design and Personality/Mind indicated Dislocation - a blatantly simple answer to many of the questions posed and attempted rationalizations in the writing, as it seemed in the moment wherein emotion held greater influence than the broader holistic overview - I pulled it down, embarrassed to have published it prematurely. (The lessons around Manifesting Generators rushing things, i tell ya, lol.) Perhaps we needed to get right to the end of the 6 line until harvest was ready, allowing for the completion of the cycle and revision/rewriting/refinement including critically-important insights in that final 1/6th. Though, t’was also Emily Amoraea’s quick share last night seeming to help connect some of the final dots and crystallize an overview into place, as she had expressed it so Beautifully…
Perhaps another puzzle piece to the “oscillation” observation/perspective of the wave back & forth between Shadow, Gift and Siddhi - or articulation of a similar principle from her differentiated viewpoint - I was wowed with her take on the Shadow & Siddhi as two binary opposites/poles, with the Gift unlocked through their embrace, integration, and balance. NOT the hierarchical organization Rudd hints at with implications that it’s a “path” of ‘rising’ from Shadow to Gift, then ‘maybe’ to the incredibly “rare” Siddhic state - a paradigm of division into ‘lower & higher’ that Way Of The Cosmic Oracle speaks boldly to as being one of the key ‘spells / poison arrows’ in the lines of Gate 2, ‘coincidentally.’ (And NOW, to wrap up…)
Having spent 6-7 hours writing & refining and ending up with feedback that might’ve just exposed it as an entire shadowy, Dislocated intellectual-masterbation session front & center in town square of the homeroom, compounded with a DEEP spiking emotional wave (as that’s 12-22’s style), last night felt like a rug-pull... lights shone into the shadows: “THIS is DISLOCATION.” A state a textbook can describe, though whose description holds little meaning until sitting smack-dab, wide-eyed in the middle of the experience itself. YET, as Gene Keys emphasizes: everything is ALWAYS part of Cosmic Order - the ‘Dislocation” ultimately being but a PERCEPTION… while still part of the UNITY…
Maybe it was ego wanting to rationalize the split between Body/Design and Personality/Mind experience in attempts to bypass the necessity of truly owning & being in the Shadow; maybe I WAS onto something and justifiably perplexed, as there ARE moments where Body can be in Peace & Satisfaction while Personality/Mind aren’t. But either way: the entire experience was itself an immerse fractal lesson IN IT. The Dislocation, Orientation, AND UNITY.
The DISLOCATION of disharmony between Body/Design and Personality/Mind states, along with the ENTROPY of energy loss in the Shados. The ORIENTATION, not only in moments where Body/Design were in its alignment and Mind/Personality in its (some overlapping, some not), but the ORIENTATION of all of it as the EXPERIENCE to accompany the theoretical lessons, individuated & mutative as delivering insight no external authority could - although complete with ‘syncronicities’ of feedback coming at just the right moments providing necessary guidance & perspectives to connect key dots as required. (Plus the Freshness of both new perspectives & their articulation.) And the UNITY & BEAUTY of it all, wrapped up into a fractal package - the shadowiest moments of Dislocation as equally rich, potent and critical to the whole as the lightest of moments in clear Orientation.
Like, wow. The Program really does know what it’s fvck!ng doing. lol. 🙏
(As to whether the mutative opportunity of the 2.6 gets seized or not… 🤷♂️)
☰☰☯️☷☷
