For so many years I wanted partners who gave me flowers. Now, a part of me doesn't believe that it's necessary or even that good for the environment to buy store-bought flowers, but I still wanted them.
What I actually wanted was what that would represent to me: that a man loved me enough to buy me flowers.
Over time I've got better and better at realising that a healthy relationship isn't one where we endlessly project our needs onto another person and expect them to make us happy. Instead, it is to realise what we need and want, to ask for them, yes, but also be willing to have those needs/wants met in other ways.
Some of the things I need or want from my partner I can get from my friends or family. It might be a particular kind of conversation I'm looking for. Or more big hugs. Or business advice.
And sometimes the things I want I can simply give to myself. Like flowers.
We have a big garden and while we don't currently have a huge number of flowering plants, there are still a few.
This morning my favourite one (that works well in a vase, that is) needed pruning back from over the driveway. So as I walked around in bare feet, earthing and letting morning light into my eyes, I took the secateurs and chopped off a big bucket worth of small branches.
This included several suitable stems, lots and lots of luscious green leaves and a few lovely magenta coloured flowers. In the vase, they went. On the bench, they went. And on my happy way, I went!
