Sometimes, we do have silly excuses for why we don’t want to venture into something, and we find it unexplainable. But the emotions toward it are as strong as ever, and while not being able to articulate our reasoning, we know deeply in our hearts that we don’t want to venture into such things because they aren’t good for us.
I live in an unfenced compound.
There is a big disadvantage to this, as it opens you to scrutiny since you don’t have your house covered up. But it is two sides of the coin, as you are also aware of what goes on around you. You can see your neighbors riding their kids to school, and you can see families having big disputes among themselves. It makes you largely conscious of your environment.
One of such days, I saw a couple walking along the road path just outside my compound. They were older, maybe in their late 60s, dressed in full Yoruba regalia. As they walked, I couldn’t help but notice a little dissimilarity between them.
The woman walked solidly, in a good-like fashion, suggesting she is still strong and agile. She also walked in front of the man.
The man walked behind, in a robotic-like fashion. It was noticeable that age was a strong indicator of why he walked that way. From the way he dressed, I could deduce that he must have retired from a good and reputable workplace, so it couldn’t be a lack of resources but basically health. It is also possible that the man must have worked hard in his youthful days to provide for himself, his family, and shoulder enough responsibilities.
This was my thought from seeing them walk.
At that point, it also flashed through my mind my disdain for a corporate job. It is a job, I believe, where you can’t fulfill all your potential, and it takes away your time to build something that can last long for you and your future generations.
As if that isn’t enough, what men face after they have worked all their lives and the troubles they retire into are not worth it.
One is the finances. They work their whole lives, not having the chance to save money or invest in another business because they can’t prioritize such business with the attention it needs as a startup.
They are left with loans, and meager salaries that get exhausted within a few days of getting paid.
After retirement, they go home with a lesser pension and without a particular date to look forward to for their gratuity. This makes them handicapped, and they can’t provide for their families as they should. This makes them feel useless and sometimes depressed. A lot of them lose respect at home since they can’t provide as they did before. They also don’t have another business to fall back on. If they do, they haven’t grown it to the level where it can better serve them.
In all of this is the family dynamics, which change. Since the wife, who is younger and more agile than the man, now has to shoulder more responsibilities, she becomes bolder. She now has more power, and this often interferes with the power dynamics.
Over the years, the strong authority the man had may, at different times, have hurt the woman, but she suffered in silence. Now, when power has tilted a little to her side, she may see it as payback time.
This is why I don’t want to do a corporate job that will take my time, leaving me unable to grow my potential or have a business that can last me a lifetime
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