I am adopted? What would I do after that!

in #hive-110602 months ago

Keren Fedida - Unsplash

For a few weeks now I have been told about the topics proposed in this community, and I have really been looking forward to participating, and one of the proposed topics just caught my eye, so I want to participate by answering the following question.

You woke up one morning to find out that the people you have always known as parents are not your biological parents. With your adoption documents in your hands serving as proof, what would be your next move?

And you may wonder why I am intrigued by this particular question, well, I actually considered it when I was a child, when my mother's risqué jokes made me believe that they had found me in the trash room, inside a shoebox, just like I once found some baby kittens.

Her insistence was such that it made me think it was true and made me question what should be my response to that new reality. Obviously, the resemblance to my mother crushed this theory, but I didn't see it that way.

Max Ovcharenko - Unplash

But had that whole scenario that was presented to me been real, most likely I wouldn't have done anything back then, because as a child the possibilities of seeking the truth, rebelling, or anything similar were subject to financial issues.

Now, as the question is posed in my present, I believe that first and foremost, this revelation would answer many questions I have had throughout my life, especially why I am so different from the rest of my family.

My next move would be to ask why they chose to adopt me, as well as if they have any knowledge of who my biological parents were. Knowing those kinds of details about my past would be really important, because beyond expressing ingratitude, it would change my perspective on how I felt as a child.

I would also try to find my original family, more to close cycles and understand their reasons, rather than to distance myself from those who have dedicated themselves to raising and caring for me in my childhood, as I believe not just anyone can do that.

Furthermore, I consider it super important to know my medical history, and just as I have done currently, investigating the diseases that have been common in my ancestors, I would also want to do so with my blood relatives.

An aggressive or depressive response would not be among my possible reactions, as over time I have learned to value the experiences and accomplishments, as all of that has been part of my personal growth, taking what has served me and discarding what hasn't, to make room for the new and the good.

I particularly believe that individuals who have been adopted should be emotionally educated so that in the event of finding out at some point, feelings of abandonment and resentment are minimal, and gratitude stands out, evidently if those who provided shelter were good parents.

Arty - Unsplash

Finally, I would like to thank those who selected me from among all the children who surely would have been waiting for a family, and in the case of finding my blood relatives, also thank them for not letting me die, as giving a child up for adoption due to being unable to care for them, is in my eyes, also a way of expressing love.


Foto/Photo by: Arty, Max Ovcharenko and Keren Fedida (all from Unsplash)
Edición/Edited by @mamaemigrante using canva
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Translated and formatted with Hive Translator by @noakmilo.

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You made a beautiful reflection friend, your post is full of love, I'm sorry that your mom played with something so delicate but we Venezuelans sometimes are not measured with jokes.

Yes, my friend, those jokes were common in my maternal family, it was bad that I had to suffer them, but the good thing is that I cut the cycle when I became a mother, they didn't get involved with my children and I didn't repeat those patterns.

Yeah that’s true. Giving up a child the moment you realize you can’t take care of the child is also love even though it might be a hard thing to understand but I’m glad you do.

That is why I am in favor of telling the truth from the beginning, in terms that the child can understand, and that he/she can also appreciate the love that his/her parents give him/her.

Yeah that’s understandable

Being adopted among the many children out there is even a privilege especially if your adoptive parents cares for you real good. With that, you owe them all the gratitude upon finding out your real parents and how you plan to go about this finding is really great

Exactly! I think that rebelling against those who have been your parents for all the time you have been alive is the worst way to react, because it has really been a family that has chosen you to be part of its nucleus, unlike the one united by blood ties.

The emotional education for adopted kids is very important. A great piece.