LOH contest #127: how do we support each other? / ¿cómo nos apoyamos entre nosotras?

in #hive-1244522 years ago

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¡Hola amigas! ¿Qué tal están? Me apunto al contest de esta semana ya que es un tema el cual ha ganado mucha importancia para mí en estos últimos meses.

La pregunta de esta semana es:

¿Mantenemos regularmente el contacto con otras mujeres, comprobando si necesitan ayuda, compartiendo las cargas entre nosotras, y cómo?

Para mí es muy importante mantenerme en contacto con otras mujeres y de hecho lo hago de forma frecuente. Por un lado, están las amigas de toda la vida. Las que sabes que a pesar de la distancia y retos de la vida, podrás contar con ellas para lo que sea. Estas son amigas de mi adolescencia aunque también incluyo a otras mujeres que he ido conociendo más recientemente y con las que he "hecho un match especial". Por ejemplo a @natalialove la conocí en Bali hace menos de un año y, a pesar de la distancia que nos separa ahora mismo, ha estado ahí para compartir con ella recientes momentos de incertidumbre.

Cuando sé que una amiga está pasando por un momento difícil suelo estar más pendiente. Le escribo de vez en cuando para ver cómo está, gestiono día y hora para hacer una llamada telefónica o si puede ser vernos en persona y comparto todos los recursos que tengo para sentirme mejor en cualquier situación.

Siendo sincera en la pregunta planteada esta semana hay una parte que no me gusta "compartiendo las cargas entre nosotras". Más que compartir las cargas lo que hago es ayudar a mi amiga a liberarse de las cargas. Al fin y al cabo para mí ayudar a otra persona no significa quitarle el peso de encima y ponermelo yo. Eso no es una buena relación, ni de amistad ni de pareja.

La forma en la que yo apoyo a mis amigas es, primero, dando un espacio seguro donde ellas puedan expresar todo lo que sienten. Saber escuchar es muy importante y muchas veces no hace falta ni decir nada. Simplemente escuchar y dejar que la otra persona se exprese. Luego dependiendo de la situación, si yo he vivido por algo similar y tengo recursos para ayudarla, compartiría estos recursos. En caso negativo, buscaría a otra persona que la pudiera ayudar.

También traería consciencia a en qué parte del ciclo menstrual se encuentran. Recientemente es algo que personalmente estoy observando mucho en mí misma. Estoy aprendiendo a gestionar mis emociones en períodos sensibles como en los días antes del inicio de la menstruación. Creo que sobre esto es algo que hoy en día aún no hay mucha consciencia por la sociedad patriarcal en la que vivimos, pero que si aprendemos a fluir más con nuestro ciclo, a comprender qué momentos son los mejores para ser productiva y cuáles los mejores para descansar, viviríamos nuestra vida de forma más harmónica y seríamos más productivas en nuestros proyectos de vida.

¿Qué opináis sobre esto? ¿Os organizáis según vuestro ciclo menstrual o todos los días son igual?

Me encantará leer vuestras respuestas sobre esta tema :D

Muchas gracias por leerme y espero que tengáis un lindo día ☀️


Hello friends, how are you? I'm joining this week's contest since it's a topic that has gained a lot of importance for me in the last few months.

This week's question is:

Do we regularly keep in touch with other women, checking if they need help, sharing the burdens with each other, and how?

For me it is very important to keep in touch with other women and in fact I do so on a frequent basis. On the one hand, there are the lifelong friends. The ones you know that despite the distance and challenges of life, you can count on them for anything. These are friends from my adolescence although I also include other women that I have met more recently and with whom I have "made a special match". For example @natalialove I met in Bali less than a year ago and, despite the distance that separates us right now, she has been there to share recent moments of uncertainty with.

When I know a friend is going through a difficult time I tend to be more vigilant. I write her from time to time to see how she is doing, arrange a day and time to make a phone call or if possible meet in person and share all the resources I have to feel better in any situation.

To be honest in the question posed this week there is a part that I don't like "sharing the burdens between us ". Rather than sharing the burdens, what I do is help my friend free herself from the burdens. After all, for me, helping someone else does not mean taking the burden off and putting it on myself. That's not a good relationship, friendship or partnership.

The way I support my friends is by, first of all, providing a safe space where they can express everything they feel. Listening is very important and many times you don't even need to say anything. Just listen and let the other person express themselves. Then depending on the situation, if I have lived through something similar and have resources to help her, I would share these resources. If not, I would look for someone else who could help.

I would also bring awareness to where they are in their menstrual cycle. Recently this is something that I am personally observing a lot in myself. I am learning to manage my emotions in sensitive periods such as in the days before the onset of menstruation. I think this is something that today there is still not much awareness about because of the patriarchal society in which we live, but if we learn to flow more with our cycle, to understand which moments are the best to be productive and which are the best to rest, we would live our lives in a more harmonious way and be more productive in our life projects.

What do you think about this, do you organize yourselves according to your menstrual cycle or are all days the same?

I would love to read your answers on this topic :D

Thank you very much for reading me and I hope you have a nice day ☀️

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what I do is help my friend free herself from the burdens

This is so thoughtful and I agree with you that it shouldn't be about sharing each others but helping each other free from burdens.

!LADY

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I'm glad that you share my thoughts about it 💖

Giving our fellow women a listening ear in a difficult time can go a long way in letting them know they are not alone. And that someone truly cares about their plight.

I as well use to be moody during my menstruation, something I'm learning to manage as possible as I can.

Yes, totally agree! 🙌 thank you for sharing your insights 💖

About menstrual cycle, I also observed that I am very sensitive, so emotionally weak before the onset of my period. I easily feel heart break, I easily cry even with a very or without right reason.

Can you share more about your observations?

That's so interesting! Thank you for sharing 🙏 Yes :) actually I'm going to write a post just about it. I would love to hear how it affects to other women as well

Hopefully I can read it. Thanks in advance.

I personally feel that sharing our burdens does help a lot in terms of our wellbeing, sometimes just talking also helps. I can understand that everyone is going through their own share, but one can always lend a ear if nothing more and that too helps to a large extent.

Yes, that's a very good point! Thank you for sharing your insights 💖

Gracias por incluirme en tu hermoso texto, y reafirmar de alguna manera nuestro vínculo.
Estoy de acuerdo con tus palabras, debemos siempre acompañar a nuestras amigas y darle espacios seguros para que se puedan expresar y soltar sus cargas cualquiera que sean.

Hermosas tus palabras.

Gracias a ti por ser como eres y por escucharme tanto en los buenos momentos como en los no tan buenos 💖

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Never thought about monthly cycle affecting one, I know some suffer more than others however when schooling or during working career, it would most definitely not have been acceptable taking days off.

Listening to others when they need someone is where more often than not one is able to assist, listen only add advice is you have walked the path in a similar way. Cup of tea and a chat is medicinal!

!LUV

I remember when I was still a student, there is one day that I would be absent in school or cut classes because of my period, I am suffering severe dysmenorrhea before.

At work, sometimes I went home with the same reason. Now I am full time mom and housewife and thankful dysmenorrhea never attacks always.

Being at home helps the situation if you suffer so badly, school days most girls never mentioned a word, suffered in silence as was expected when I was growing up.

That's so sad, one of the suffering of some women.

Treated more equal, no excuses! If a doctors certificate was provided by the parents the school would comply, not left to the whim of parents or pupils.

Cup of tea and a chat is medicinal! totally agree! thank you for your sharing your insights 💖

Only one good friend, sibling or mother to be with 🤣 we all need someone.

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