The Controversial Garment

in #hive-1244522 years ago

PSX_20220911_181002-01.jpeg


The Brassiere

My resentment for the Bra resurfaced today.
I require a few replacement ones, but I had difficulty finding the appropriate bras at the local Marks and Spencer's Department Store; the name I trust for such.

Where did my resentment come from?

Well, growing up, I was a tomboy who played football and cricket in the streets. I always wore my t-shirt tucked behind my neck with my chest exposed, just like all the little boys did.
I became a carefree and rebellious teenager of petite stature, and when I grew to 5ft 2ins, it was apparent that I'd maximized my vertical growth. However, there was a steady, continuous growth in the fatty tissues on my chest.

At the onset of the development of the upper area of my body, I was instructed by my mum that my time had come to wear an extra garment like that of hers and my elder sisters.

Me: What's the purpose?
Mother: For support.
Me: Support? What support? They are firm?
Mother: Well, they won't remain firm unless you wear a bra.

The brassiere was the most sexist-sounding thing I'd ever heard of, and I didn't like the idea of strapping down a part of me that I felt should move freely.
Anyway, I was open-minded enough to give the bra a try, but I felt constricted in them and I'd wear a bra occasionally.


Size Matters

I later discovered that the discomfort that I was experiencing was caused by wearing the incorrect bra size. Yes, the bra size matters! The number on the bra is the diameter around the body, which should be snug, not tight or lose, and the letter represents the size of the cup, that covers the breasts.

Ladies, have you ever had measurement for your correct bra size?

Most department stores, including ones like M&S, offer measurement of the bust size, to help women to have the best experience with the bra.

Some things to determine the right size of the bra are:

  • the cup size, the area that the breast sits in.
  • The band (diameter of the bra) that goes around the body
  • The bridge of the bra, the area that meets the cups
  • The straps that go over the shoulders.

There are different kinds of bras: the most common ones might be an underwired bra, as the one seen above, and the sports bra.
IMG_20220910_110359_245~2-01.jpeg

Lacy Sports Bra

I quite like wearing a sports bra because there is no underwire, and they offer good support.

However, for an underwire bra, it's extremely important to wear the right cup size, so that the wire outlines the breast and does not rest on the breast.
IMG_20220910_105651_436.jpg

The Balcony Bra

Another kind of Bra that has a strong bridge and offers good support for the even heavier breasts. This bra is actually 2 cups size smaller than my required size, however, with guidance, I was instructed that for the shape and cut of this bra, I could wear it without harming or feeling any discomfort. It also perks the breasts up. Note that it's still different from a push up bra. I do not have any of those.

Am I now an advocate for the brassiere, you might be wondering?

I see the value in wearing a bra, but I'll never be fond of them.

As my two feet are inside my house and the door is closed, there goes my bra.

#freedom


Different factors might contribute to the changing of womens breasts. Some factors might be changes in weight, breastfeeding, lack of exercise, and of course, gravity. My opinion is that the bra cannot defy gravity, and that the muscles supporting the breast can benefit from exercises, just as the other muscles in the body will. Still, the bra does offer some support to the surrounding muscles around the arms, ribs, neck, and upper back, which is most effective with the correct bra size, which offers full support.
Contrarily to what many might believe, the support of the bra does not come only from the cup that the breast sits in, but it comes especially from the support from the band, and also how well adjusted the straps of the bra are.


I must admit that for the last few years during the lockdown especially, I went many days without the bra, and I haven't noticed any changes in my bosom from doing so. This observance somehow triggered the resurfacing of my bra importance theory, hence the reason why I've been delaying sourcing replacement ones.

I think there are numerous reasons why some women might opt to go braless, and I recently saw this article in the Daily Mail: Women should swim topless in public pools to end the 'sexualisation' of their bodies and 'fight discrimination', Spanish authorities declare.
This article indeed caught my attention of course, and made me reflect on my initial feelings about the bra.

Still, my plan is to continue to wear a bra, and I decided that instead of purchasing the same size that I've done for the past 10 years, that I might be due to have a new measurement done. This is because our bodies change, and I see good bras as an investment to guard against developing back problems and avoiding neck pain. Also, the breasts are a delicate part of the female body which I believe should have tender loving care whether a woman chooses to wear a bra or not.

Ladies, how do you feel about the bra? What are some of the changes you have observed in your breasts throughout the years, and men, please feel free to voice whatever aspect of this issue that you might relate to... you never know...

Thanks for reading and being here.
I look forward to the comments, and I'm open about discussions of this kind. That's how I initially discovered that I was wearing bras way too small for my bosom...just from a casual chat with another female who got her breast measured.

Sort:  

You know... I rarely wear one anymore. I hate 'em. Just loathe them.

They feel more like a corset these days than anything vaguely sexy or beautiful.

Sure... my boobs don't look so great. They look natural though and it's sad that this is no longer considered beautiful.

If I absolutely HAVE to wear one of the things I only wears sports bras and have for some years now. More comfortable. And they also flatten my chest out. But I've always preferred to look more androgynous.

I've also read research that claims ti actually does worse for to your breasts if you wear a bra... so who knows.

Nice to meet you :) I'll look out for more from you for sure.

Nice to meet you too 😊

Yeah, lately I've been reluctant to wear bras most days because I believe they do more harm than good.

I'm glad you found my post even though it's been 2 weeks and time for me to get back in the blogging game:)

I really liked your post, as your ideas resonate with me.
I try to live my life as simply as possible to maintain inner peace.
Maybe you would be interested in sharing in The Minimalist community, so here's a link for you to check it out:)))

Have a great week ahead🌻

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Find The Minimalist Community here

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And yes... it's time you wrote some new stuff. I saw that1

😅

Oh would I ever.

I've had my eye on this community for a while now. It's coming your way soon. 😆

I'm down to one backpack of clothes and a small one for the young person, a laptop, a hula hoop, two guitars (one should go but I just can't do it), some books (two big bookshelves gone), a tv, some kitchen stuff, a bed and some bedding and a fridge.

That's what's left.

It's a story and I'm getting around to sharing it but still in some flux here.

But losing almost everything and getting rid of almost everything else rest is the best thing that's happened to me in years 👍

(including the bras ;) )

But losing almost everything and getting rid of almost everything else rest is the best thing that's happened to me in years

#Metoo

I wanna get back into hula hoops. It's a great total body workout and helps with coordination:)))

I've had my eye on this community for a while now.

Feel free to share any aspect of your minimalist/simple lifestyle, or you can respond to any active or previous #KISS topic presented weekly.
Looking forward to seeing you there:)

Hoop dancing gets you fit as all get out :)

The master Jedi....

I'll be there. 🔥 Thanks for getting me in touch 🌺



Wow!
Cheers for this 😁

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Gotta say, I'm not a fan. Currently, only wear one if I'm wearing something see-through or some fancy dress, where a bra would give a "nicer" look, I guess. I find it physically restrictive and tiring.

As for measuring, you know, that was a mystery to me for a long time, as well. I look at some of my first bras now and wonder who the hell was buying those, as they're not the right fit in the slightest. Honestly, I mostly went by trial-and-error at the store directly. First time I measured (the right way...I think) was in lockdown, while shopping online.

Currently, only wear one if I'm wearing something see-through or some fancy dress, where a bra would give a "nicer" look...

I understand that very well.
As I teenager I went braless even when wearing my see-through tops, which the elders in my small village in Jamaica disapproved of.
My mum only instructed me to buy what she classed as way bigger than the sizes of herself and my sisters. Unfortunately, they were still way too small and could have caused me health woes.

When I lived overseas in Asia, I always received packages of bras from my best friend in the UK, because she knew I could not find my size. During lockdown I had an entire drawer full of bras that I'd stop wearing.

I'm like you, and wear them for the same reason you do now.

I find it physically restrictive and tiring.

Whether it's to #FreeTheNipples, or just for #ASenseOfFreedom, I do hope that you will find comfort whenever you do wear one 💛

I hate bras but they are necessary for support sometimes. The right fitting one is less uncomfortable and I only wear them if I really have to. The problem is finding the right fitting one. The sizing never seems to be consistent and it's very frustrating.

Also, I think the fullness of the breast changes with our hormones, therefore I had a variety of different fit. Some days my breast felt full, and other days "empty" if you know what I mean.💐

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I thought that the cover photo was a cool hat at first...😆

Such mixed opinions on bras it seems. Some can't live with them and other couldn't imagine not wearing them. I'm glad I don't have that issue. A fair amount of women don't wear them in France. It seems like it would be more comfortable to wear one.

Sounds like there is a lot that goes into selecting the right one. I'm glad I don't have to deal with that 😅

Hahaha yes it is such a complex topic. I guess if it were to ask the men, they would say all women to throw away the bra and embrace freedom lol🤣

😆🤣😂

Haha! That would have been a cool hat indeed!

It seems like it would be more comfortable to wear one.

No, not at all... only when running!

I have heard that about French women, and I recall the first time I saw a French woman topless as she walked to witness a wedding on the beach that I was coordinating.
The lady was comfortable in her element; Ecstatic for the bride, not realizing for a moment that she was creating a stir.

Yes, there's a lot to be considered when choosing the right bra, and many Chiropractors offer good advice to women, who sometimes don't realize that their upper back problems stem from incorrect fitting bras, and maybe an infrequent replacement of bras.

Consider yourself lucky that you do not have this problem. 😅
Maybe it's a good thing that the fatty tissues developed more in my chest and not my sisters because if I were different, there's no way I would just wear a bra just for the sake of wearing one 😆

I get you. This stuff feels like bondage. Though, I can't possibly go out without wearing a bra. So I just try to get my size to avoid discomforting myself. The freedom that comes from taking off bras is immeasurable💆‍♀️

💯%

Thanks for your thoughtful comment:)

So many days late... Sorry, but when I saw this, I had to reply! Yes to everything. The worst experience any woman can have is going shopping for a bra.

Until you find that you should be measured. I am measured every time. I also found something new a few years ago. Having them custom-made. Do you want to talk about slipping into something comfortable? Depending on where you buy it, some are less than 50% more, but, hello? So worth it.

I had trouble with my straps falling down. So annoying. Now, not a problem.

Yeah, I think investing in a good bra is definitely worth it.
Also, to find the right style that goes with various outfits!

I had trouble with my straps falling down

Ha! The only thing I can think of that is probably equally annoying is having a mosquito buzz at my ear 😡

Thank you so much for the tip! I really appreciate it, even though you didn't have to 🌸

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I remember feeling so down when I was a teen and everyone was getting puffier in the chest area while me....well...it was a short ride lol. Something grew just a little and that was it haha.
I guess it is hard to imagine back pain from boobies for someone who had small boobs since forever. Now I am super happy about "my girls" and I would not change them at all. I believe it is a real issue to have big boobs, especially for the back.

Most of my bras are push up. The girls need some extra fluff lol

I think it was the same for my sisters. Their boobies started growing before mine because I'm the youngest... a year apart each. However, the growth of their boobies ended by the time mine started to grow, so they would never have any back problems either 😅
It's strange how different sisters can be; three girls, completely different body types and figures:)

Oh I can relate. My older sister has a puffy chest lol. And after giving birth to two babies....that was not so pretty lol. And I did heard her complain. So what men think is oh so sexy....for those women it is quite a serious problem. I envy no more haha I am happy with my boobs just as they are. Self acceptance is huge because I believe that this desire to have big boobs has been served to young girls through advertisements.
Nowadays I feel it has become less important.

Yeah, I do think that people are more accepting these days, and some use other forms of fashion to feel better about themselves too:)

This is one of the challenges I face every time I needed new ones. The Balcony type are the most comfortable for me but the brand I used to love seems to have changed in sizing and there had been a few ones I bought that ended up not being used because the fitting sucked.

I stay bra-less when I'm home and not expecting any guests.

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Yeah, I do like that balcony-style bra. I wear it for special outfits. That one I got from Ann Summers, another popular bra shop here in the UK. The styles of the bra are more exciting than those at M&S, and so is the clerk who told me that I could go for a smaller size for a more sexy look - something that the M&S measuring ladies twitch at in disgust.

I stay bra-less when I'm home and not expecting any guests.

That's considerate of you.
When I was in my twenties, all my friends came to accept that when they came to my house (my comfort zone) that I'd always be topless. I don't do it anymore now that I'm married.😂

I think it's a great style :)

I don't do it anymore now that I'm married.😂

I did the opposite hehe. I seldom went topless in my twenties but when I got married, I started not wearing any, lol!

I'm happy that I delayed making my purchases, even more now that you've so highly about the balcony style ... I'll definitely go for those. 😁🙌

Hehe, glad you did :) It's been one of my favorite styles since my teens. I do have some other styles but rarely use them :)

😍

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I think that all women have a love and hate relationship with bras, and I understand you when you say that it is difficult to find the right cup, as well as one that fits the contour of the chest, I have also experienced it at home, I never wear them alone I use them when I go out and if the blouse doesn't deserve it I forget about them.

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I hate bras, I stopped wearing them years ago (probably to the determinant of my poor figure. Haha). Now and again, if I go out in something clingy, I’ll wear a bra, but the best experience of that day will always be the moment I pull it off. I suppose I’m crazy 😜 and should just make a bra for myself that I find comfortable, it’s interesting that I’ve never done so, considering that I made swimwear for a living at one point.

I must admit that for the last few years during the lockdown especially, I went many days without the bra, and I haven't noticed any changes in my bussom from doing so. This observance somehow triggered the resurfacing of my bra importance theory, hence the reason why I've been delaying sourcing replacement ones.

Tadaaa, exactly! 🤗❤️💕❤️❤️🤗🤗 FREEDOM TASTES SO WONDERFUL

Making my own bra is something I never thought of. I also saw @nineclaws mention that she should make her own. That's a clever idea.
I think you're at an advantage since you already make swimsuits 🙌

Yeah, our bodies will change regardless, and the older I get, comfort wins.
.
.
You've reminded me that I should probably get some new swimwear instead. That way I can double up wearing the tops as bras while I'm in Jamaica, and actually get good use out of them while I'm there. 😁

I’ll put up some patterns for swimwear, so that if you sew you can make your own. 🙃😉😉😉. Jamaica makes me very jealous, though, that sounds super exciting. Have a blast⛱🛫🏖🏝🗺🛳⛱⛱⛱🏖🏖🏝

That would be excellent to see your patterns.
I haven't used a sewing machine in ages, but it would be something nice to do when I'm back home.
I'm so excited about going back to the vibrant Caribbean.😎

🏝🏖⛱❤️❤️❤️

I have never had someone else measure me. But, I remember seeing instructions on how to do it in an old mail-order catalogue decades ago and did it, myself. Bras are always sold in even-numbered band sizes (32, 34, 36, etc.) but I always got an odd-number when I measured. So, I just did my best with it. 😂

Miraculously, I managed to buy a bra once that fit me perfectly! Even after wearing it all day at the office and then going out for dinner with some coworkers afterwards (Girls' Night!), arriving home late, it didn't bother me at all. So, I raced back to the store a couple days later and bought several more of the same brand & size so I'd have plenty of them! 😁 That was probably twenty years ago and I still have some of them because I took very good care of them and wear some of my other bras, too, not just those.


SupportBras.jpg

but I always got an odd-number when I measured

That's something I never thought of, and yeah, how do you rectify that, really?!

I do the same and purchase in "bulk" when I find a bra style, size, and fabric that fits comfortably.

Yes, I think if it's a good quality bra, and you take good care of them, that they can last for a few years.

It's convenient that you figured out how to do the measurement yourself. I think I'd be fine in getting the band size, but I think next time I go back, I'll have to take better note of how they do the cup size measurement.

Thanks for sharing that :)))
Have a nice week ahead!

Kitty: I always got an odd-number when I measured
Milly: how do you rectify that, really?!

Since most bras have two or three sets of hooks, it's not too bad. And I have a couple of "bra extenders" if I get into a real "pinch" 😆

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Oh, that's awesome. I must remember this idea for sure. Could be very useful. Thanks for this idea 😁🙌

Nice article I was getting smiled during reading your post. As grown up in India It was very complicated shopping to buy bras and being free to talk with a salesman was very difficult specially about size and design. Mostly looking for a salesgirl to talk about. but at that time not so many salesgirls like now. but now that time is over. Now don't like to use bras. without a bra feels easy to breathe. wearing a sari is easier don't need a bra. because Indian tailors are so clever they make the blouse exactly fit on the breast in very elegant ways. without any problems. And here having lots of warm clothes I think not require a bra. but your post is very interesting.
And the photo of the bra looks like a hat first I thought the post is about the hat. greetings❤️😊

Hello there!
Your comment is so funny!
You are the second person who thought the photo was a hat.
I learned something about the sari, and it's nice to know that the tailors use their skills in that way.
It's good that you have more female sales clerks because the last thing you want to do is discuss buying a bra with a strange man 😅
Thanks for stopping by:)))

Do you prefer the wired ones or the non-wired ones? It's more comfortable with no hard parts underneath. Do you think wearing the wrong bra size has a factor in having breast cancer issues?

Hey there!
I've found myself wearing predominantly underwired bras for so long that the only other type I recall is that of a sports bra without wires.
I am going to go back to wearing bras without the wire and see how I get on (as well as good-fitting sports bras).
I don't think there's any correlation between wrong-fitting bras and breast cancer, or even fibrocystic breast disease (which I suffer(ed)... I haven't had an ultrasound in many years...However, the wrong bra size can lead to bad posture, upper back problems, and neck and shoulder problems. Suffering from any of these problems can cause stress which might lead to other severe problems, and also sleeping problems.
Thanks for stopping by 😁

Yeah..I think so. And it's difficult to breathe when wearing wrong size bra 🤣..

That's very true 🤣

For me I think wearing bra is not necessary because I'm not that busty but my mom forced me to be wearing it, she will buy it and keep it in my wardrobe. The first time I wear a bra was like, I don't know how to describe the feeling but I'm not that comfortable and I blamed those that make bra. But with time I got use to it.

Yeah, I guess it's one of those things that society forces upon us, and we just go along for the sake of it.
I'm happy that you got used to wearing them.
Thanks for stopping by:)

You are most welcome. If it is Left to me I won't use it.

I bet:)

I laughed when I saw this. What woman doesn't share this sentiment? I've never been sold on the support aspect, muscles matter and age does no one favours. Bodies do indeed change.

The difficulty with purchasing any ready-made garment, is they are made according to set patterns, which varies from manufacturer to manufacturer, so even if you know your size accurately, there's still frustration in fitting.

Your post resonated with me because I've been thinking about this for several months to the point that I'm motivated to going back to making my own, but something different, haven't settled on the exact design as of yet. I'd go without, but exercising without is not a fun experience (unless swimming, yeah that's a lot of fun). Never have found a sports bra that was workable either.

In Canada, it's legal for women to go topless outside for many years, same sort of idea as men without shirts, but for whatever reasons, women just don't want to do that.

The difficulty with purchasing any ready-made garment, is they are made according to set patterns, which varies from manufacturer to manufacturer, so even if you know your size accurately, there's still frustration in the fitting.

That's true!... and another thing is that you need to have so many different styles of Bras for different outfits.

Haha! As a teenager, I reserved the bra for when i add intentions of running, and I stopped running because of the discomfort I felt from my breast.
I think the problem with the sports bra is that band and the cup/frame seldom correspond, and there's no way to adjust the band, so I get what you experience.

😲I didn't know that about Canada. Hmm, maybe that's the place to be.😁👌

Hahaha, yes, different styles for different outfits. I've made them before, so I have everything to do so again, once I settle on designs, something that doesn't feel like a torture device, lol.

Have you ever tried on a real antique corset? A friend of mine helped me do that one time. Made me grateful that I don't have to wear such a beastly thing.

😲I didn't know that about Canada. Hmm, maybe that's the place to be.😁👌

I'm not so sure Canada is the place to be, but there are some beautiful spots here. I've yet to see a woman go topless here, despite it being legal for many years now.

something that doesn't feel like a torture device

For sure! I really like the idea of making my own bra too, thanks to you and another comment 😍

Have you ever tried on a real antique corset?

No, I haven't! However, I assisted a friend in getting into one, and it was painful enough to just watch her squeezing into it. Definitely torture in my view too 😏

I'm sure you could do it. Might take some time and practice but definitely doable and you can do whatever you want, no limits!

Hahaha! So you assisted a friend getting into one of those contraptions and know. Yes, painful indeed and absolutely torture. For my friend and I, it was worth all the laughter the whole time.

For my friend and I, it was worth all the laughter the whole time.

I bet it was 🤣

... and I can't wait to check out some fabrics and ideas to start :))

It was, but everyone outside the change room must have thought us crazy once we came out and we saw them staring.

So many fabrics, you could have a lot of fun with it. 😁

It was, but everyone outside the change room must have thought us crazy

You paint a vivid image there 🤣

If it were safe to never wear a bra, I would choose not to😂 but I am no petite and I live in a conservative country with somewhat high sexual assault and people gazing+ recording women in a bikini. Bra sizes here are sold in number and each has different sizes but much like you, I love my sports bra and my mom was the one who introduced me to it. I think sports bra are the most convenient since I move a lot but now, since I try to be a bit more feminine, I tried those wired bra, they are hell. Who even had the idea of making that kind of bra lol.

The wired ones can be very painful, I once took a size too small and I felt out of breath after a day. Torture lol.

country with somewhat high sexual assault and people gazing

That's one of the reasons why it's important for me to replace mine now that I'm going back to Jamaica.😏

Bra sizes here are sold in number and each has different sizes

I think that's the same in Jamaica, and also in the Philippines. That's one of the reasons I guess why my mum never knew the importance of getting me the right fit. She was more concerned to have a doctor stop the growth of my breast, which of course I objected to.

It's when I came to Europe that I got accurate information on my correct size and the breakdown of the measurement, how to determine the proper fit, and how hazardous wearing incorrect sizes can be.

wired bra, they are hell.

They are, especially a poorly made one!

I love your post and the story you shared. I think a lot of people are wearing the wrong bra and will be happy that they come across this article. As a young girl - I remember my grandaunt who made the prettiest dress for me - telling me of the importance of size and fitting for clothing. As I developed, my mom gave me a bra without evening asking me to fit it. I guess she thought one size fitted all young girls or she did not want to discuss it. My grandaunt did however. She was the perfect lady and alway looked amazing. Bra size does matter. As my body changed over the years with children etc. I am forced to measure correctly. I am very particular about bras actually and I wish that they could be made to measure. Although bras do get better and better- I have found adjustable sports bra but with terrible cup fitting and vice versa. I recently told my daughter to try Miss Mary of Sweden as she has exhausted all local shops and measurements. Have you heard of that brand?

I think a lot of people are wearing the wrong bra

Of that, I'm sure!

will be happy that they come across this article.

I do hope so 🤞

Hmmm, Miss Mary sounds familiar. I think that was the brand my girlfriend bought in Holland (a very nice expensive brand). That's where she first got her bra size measured. When she came back and told me the size bra she bought, I told her that could not be correct because my breast were like 5 times bigger than hers. It was so funny. That's when I discovered how to determine the size correctly, and I was shocked to see how high the letters went up to :)

Lol - I had to laugh. Yes Miss Mary is a good one. It is shocking sometimes as looks are deceiving when it come to cups.

That's so very true!!

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I don't like bras😩 Even with the perfect size I still know that I breath out everytime I pull it off. I am grateful for bras regardless because for runners with a big breasts, the sport bra helps hold them in place and make sporting easier for them.
For those with little breasts it helps give them a better outlook when they're dressed.
And for those who have breastfed lots of babies and no longer have firm ones, the bra helps push them up.

I honestly knew nothing much about bra sizes until few weeks ago. My mum never bought me a bra, I always bought them myself. She never agreed that I should wear a bra back then because my breasts were so small and they still are. In a bid to help with the humiliation I got from people, I had to start wearing a bra. I wouldn't even try them on before buying even when I'm asked to. I'll just say I know the size I want and sometimes I wouldn't admit that it's for me. Thinking about it now makes me laugh so hard😂

A few years later, I started trying bras on before buying. The one that fits better, I buy. Still I knew nothing about the sizes. Few weeks ago while making a new purchase, I took note of the numbers written on them. I had to write it down so that I will not forget or make a mistake next time.

Thanks to your post I now have a better understanding of the numbers written on bras. I don't like them regardless but out of necessity, I now have to wear them.

I'm always surprised at how little emphasis is made on something as important as wearing the proper size bra.
You made such valid points about the different effects and desires women with different breast sizes might seek.

Something tells me that in your region of the world, there might not be standard sizes, just like the drawbacks of the bras sold in Jamaica and other developing nations.

It's good that you are aware, and you find that the smaller bras (push-ups and others) do come in more appealing designs:)))