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Do I believe in life long fidelty? Oh yes, I do; that would be the simple answer to the question. Fidelity, trust and commitment are the bedrock of any relationship. When one of these qualities wavers the relationship falters. Life is like a boat on the high seas, when a partners fidelty is in question the boat totters and swirls around like one caught in the vortex of a storm.
I have been married for the last 34 years and I've been in the same relationship for the last 36 years. We've has our fair share of misunderstandings, troubles and problems, as it is common any normal relationship. However, our boat has never been rocked violently or beyond control due to this one thing called fidelty in our lives. No matter what happens I know for sure that I have a loyal, committed and faithful partner by my side. I know that the storms of life will pass by but our relationship will stand because of the fidelity factor, we never let each other down. We have flaws but flaws can't make us unfaithful.
I'd like to view this question from another perspective, How would I react to a partner who is unfaithful? Wouldn't living with such a person lower the worth of who I am? Yes, it would. Would I be happy in such a demeaning relationship? Would I be at peace? Absolutely not. I would be on tenterhooks all the time wondering what is simmering behind my back. I would constantly be second guessing my husband's every move. I would not only lose my peace but I would destroy his peace as well. A person who loses his/her peace also has a high chance of losing his/her sanity.
Loyalty/fidelity is the backbone and the stability of a relationship. If there are kids in the equation they definitely need stability to feel secure. Fidelity says some thing about you - that you hold the other person in the highest regard. It also says some thing about the other person in the relationship that they have entrusted their heart to the right person. It's a mutual thing. Fidelity is the epitome of trust and commitment in a relationship.
Fidelity in relationship, to country or to God is what epics are made of. Fidelity is not just another moral value, it is the highest among them all. It is what lifts a human to a super human degree. Nonetheless, I'd like to keep this discussion practical. I would liken fidelity to the polestar, it constantly points to the same direction, a traveler will never loose his way as long as he follows the polestar. Fidelity is the compass of life.
The proverb, 'A rolling stone gathers no moss' would be true of fidelty. If we move from one person to another we would never really achieve much in life. We would find ourselves constantly adjusting ourselves to partners and places. Focus is what we need in life, focus gives us direction and direction leads us to our goals.
It would do us good to consider this, we regard dogs as mans best friend because of their loyalty and fidelty. This character of dogs endears these creatures to us more than any other animal. It epitomizes the bond between humans and animals.
Personally speaking I never felt it a burden to practice fidelity in my life. It comes naturally when you love and respect someone and you are committed to making the relationship work. When we go shopping we see so many things on display, many things fascinate us, many things vie for our attention but a wise shopper has eyes only for what he/she needs. So is life, when you've found the one you need you keep your eyes on that one person. Many will attract us but our commitment will keep us focused on the object of our love.
I believe, I wholeheartedly believe in life long fidelity. It works for me and for my family.
Coming to the second question - Would I prefer to see into the past or the future?
Great question, the answer is very easy. I'd rather see clearly in the present. The past is behind me. I've seen it, lived it and understand it quite well in retrospect. So, I am not interested in the past. The future is in the realm of the unknown, but would I want to see into the future? Absolutely not. I had written about this in one of my posts earlier.
Let me share a story with with you to help you see clearly why I wouldn't like to see into the future. I once prayed intensely for the gift to be able to see into the future. Sometime later I found out that I would know the name of my caller even before I lifted the phone receiver. This uncanny gift made me extremely nervous. To someone who didn't fear much this dumb object - the telephone became an object that I feared.
This fear I had in me made the gift vanish. A couple of years ago I had a major health issue and I almost died. If I had known that I would face this problem in my future my fear of sickness and dying would have never let me live the happy, carefree life I've lived all these years. Fear kills more than the disease itself, I know this for a fact.
Let's cross the bridge when we come to it. Until then let's enjoy this journey called life. The journey is as important as the destination itself. there is so much to learn from this journey. Living in the moment makes each precious moment we live worth it. I prefer to enjoy each moment as it comes. Knowing the future would rob life of the surprises and the excitement it holds for us. Not knowing the future makes this journey called life one huge adventure.
Thanks for these thought provoking questions, it made me want to respond the moment I read it.
This is my response to the Ladies of Hive contest #162
