I wonder if we no longer knows the meaning of an apology.
Maybe am acting too personally by generalizing it. Sorry! really. But believe me, it had kinda diminished in value.
We say the word “Am Sorry” knowing fully well it's just mere words from within, lets us be reminded some even go to lengths to involve the (at that point) innocent devil in our mistakes.
Oh, what am I even saying? If “Love” could be abused, “Sorry” shouldn't matter much right?
But it still hurts so bad, especially in a circumstance where the objectives of arriving such results could have been possible was easily overlooked.
I wouldn't apologize for a thing that happens within my control.
Yes, I wouldn't because I've done it before and it sucks so bad. I could barely look at myself because all I saw was the shame of how low I allowed myself to fall.
But why does it feel differently when I become the victim? It's absurd thinking but why take the stress to apologize for a convenient mistake..?
However, I guess my only flaw in this, is accepting the raw truth that no one could be me just as I can't be like anyone and that alone is all the answers I seek as much as my guilt wouldn't make me voice out an apology. On the other hand, for someone else's might just be the accurate time to feel all remorseful and that's where the problem lies because at that exact moment is where I would appreciate total sincerity on the reasons for your deeds to the presume apologies that in my head (feels faked) which I would rather not hear and prefer it never comes as long as my emotions could handle.
