so I took this picture in 2022
Maroon Five's Memories used to be one of my favorite songs, and that is because the lyrics are meaningful; they are not just sentences strung together by a drunk person or someone under the influence of weed or another form of intoxication.
The lyrics speak volumes, and it is clear that they are about loss. On YouTube, the songs with the most comments and views are about love and loss.
The lead singer bawled his heart out in this one. In reality, we can interpret loss in a variety of ways, including death, the loss of love, friendship, companionship, or the loss of pleasant memories.
You can lose people without them dying, but sometimes the worst loss is when they are no longer available. You can not hear them speak or see their faces, and their memories may fade over time while the pain remains.
Except for permanent losses, the majority of losses are manageable.
When people lose money, love, or health, their ability to adapt and recover can compensate for the loss. When people break up, it takes time to heal, but the heart eventually recovers, thanks to life's coping mechanism, which includes replacing old memories with new ones.
This is what life is all about: without memories, we are just zombies. These memories are both good and bad, and we usually work hard to replace the bad memories with good ones.
So, when the loss is temporary, we usually succeed; when the opposite is true, the pain is permanent. We may experience the illusion of closure, but no one truly heals; we simply adapt to the pain and learn to live with it.
I do not mind the temporary loss of people in my life.
When you have dealt with permanent loss, there is no reason you can not handle temporary loss. The (temporary) loss of a job, a friend, a business partner, or possibly some friends with whom you are no longer affiliated.
I understand that pain is pain, and sometimes we can not ignore a lesser pain, but in reality, I used to tell myself that if I lose people because our interests no longer align, our business is over, or we simply became distant for no reason, as long as they are alive and doing well in their own way, I am fine with them not being here.
It will be more difficult for me to deal with the idea that they are dead or vice versa, and just because I had a bad relationship with them does not mean I do not wish them well in whatever they do in life.
Most of the time, I check the social media updates of people with whom I am no longer affiliated, or their Telegram updates, to see how they are doing, and I do this in a subtle way, not spooking them with a "hello" or something similar.
Make-up conversations are difficult, so rather than making people uncomfortable by instilling guilt in them, it is best to just let them be and live their lives.
In reality, we were all born apart, and this is how it will remain.
When good and bad things happen, they happen individually, and no matter how you are connected or affiliated with someone, they get to enjoy their successes, failures, pain, and happiness separately, just as you will.
So it is mostly okay to admit that you will be alone during your most difficult times in life.
Life is shaped in a multidimensional way, with people living in the illusion of security or comfort, but we are rarely as safe or secure as we believe.
There is no need to jinx it.
When you think about life, losses, pain, and uncertainties too much, you develop a psychological divide. So, most of the time, just enjoy the present moment and try to replace sad memories with less sad ones.
for the record,I look nothing like this in the present, I think I've lost a lot of weight which now makes my cheekbones more evident than it was, like in this picture (it's not a good thing to lose weight for me)
I was looking through a few photos I would taken over the years, and some of them made me sad, while others made me laugh uncontrollably.
Just looking at one picture brings back memories of the event, as if it happened yesterday. In fact, you relive it as if it were yesterday, and it is amazing how something can happen a long time ago, but with just one spark, you remember it like it was yesterday.
In my battle with my health complications, I have often struggled with forgetfulness, where I am in the moment but my mind is already lost in the past, and I recall getting my food burned months ago because I completely forgot I was cooking.
Most of the time, I was preoccupied with all the permanent losses that had ravaged me, and because they were permanent, it was difficult to let them go, because, let us be honest, we can not put new pictures in an old album.
an old picture that reflects recent state of mind
This is quite different from losing people temporarily due to life events. I am not one to dwell on such losses; I just believe they are unavoidable due to the transactional and transcendent nature of life.
Cheers To The Things That We Have
Our memories are the most powerful thing we have, and they are what define us as higher beings in our universe. It is funny how a few memories flooding the mind can elicit a variety of emotions.
It is how you can cry and laugh at the same time, or frown and smile simultaneously.
Memories Brings Back Memories
I cherish the memories of people I have temporarily lost because one day, I might meet them again and possibly make amends with them, or maybe not. If it does not happen, I am fine with that.
I am coming to terms with the harshness of reality, and in the end, our journey is to live our lives alone, not with others. We cannot live someone else's life or vice versa. We are all we have, and everything else can disappear.
This is why we never give up on ourselves, even when others do. That is why we do not rely on the strength of others, regardless of who they are to us.
I am not sure if I am realizing this too early in life. However, there is no "too early" or "too late" in life. We are here today, but we might not be tomorrow, and there is nothing we can do but accept this reality.
Interested in some more of my works
Is it Easy To Make Money?
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Virtual Bank Apps In Nigeria: An Experience Of Gamification
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Personal Finance: Achieving Intentional "Saving" Goals
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Interested in some more of my works