A Detour (18+)

in #hive-15032911 months ago

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Detour

 
Well that didn't turn out as planned.

I'm not sure how many times I've said this to myself, over these last years, but if I had a dollar...

So this part was supposed to be the unwritten chapters of The Accidental Theory (still a.k.a "The Book That May Never Be Written), for those in the know in the Hive-Verse.

Yeah I'm talking to you who've been interested and supportive enough to have followed along over this last year and a bit, despite how triggering and bizarre some of the story is. Thank you, btw

Yes, I gave myself away intentionally when I first created the profile to some of you. I do pretty much everything I do with more thought and intention, these days, than I've been able to for almost my entire 52 years on the plant.

But it took facing a great deal of very triggering, scary shit to get me to the point that I can do such things (almost) entirely without fear, these days.

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This project was, an attempt, to guide you through a similar process so that you might let go of some of your unconscious fears as well. And also to offer a more story based explanation of how this "gift" of recovery came about.

But I think I may have scared some people in the wrong way around here...

and altogether a bit too much!

But then I did warn y'all...

I've been called extreme.

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All of my favourite Art with a capital A is kinda extreme and all of my favourite art and music both are feely kinda feels, you know.

It's not you. It's me. 🙃

So, because of the nature of the content and the experience I want to offer as a more interactive walkthrough kinda thang, as well as the need for financial stability and the problems I keep running into exactly because of the nature of the content and experience...

I've decided to move this part off-chain.

It just makes more sense all around. For everyone, I think.

But...

what the question I was moving towards, with this opening gambit, should have been is...

"Is it an ism, or is it Art?" 😉

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What you may have experienced, however, if you did find this post is some unonscious bias/prejudice and/or some fear and a bit of your own Shadow.

Along with a fuck ton of social dialogue that we must have an objective look at, in order to "heal" all of the above.

So it becomes quite a conundrum, you see.

We naturally turn away from the things we most need to address to heal. And we naturally attack the projection of our own Shadow and our deepest fears instinctively.

Then how to present this, with the goal being to guide people...

without getting hurt.

Especially when you're a bit low on resilience and resources and can't afford another hit of (not my) unconscious.

Well... perhaps you Warner Brother, *stolen from somewhere on the internet of amazing things so that you don't trigger folks accidentally. And so that folks get to choose the experience.

It's probalby more polite, isn't it?

But not half as exciting and fun! To me anyway, but I'm also very into spontaneity because I believe it creates authentic engagement and, thus, authentic experience

And yeah. I would've "come out" at the end.

Because, I honestly believe, without standing in our Truth fully...

this whole personal growth and recovery thing is futile and we simply perpetuate all of the reasons that we may find ourselves struggling today.

So back to the drawing board then. 🤔

But...

isn't it all actually "perfect" and a part of the experience anyway?!

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Humans have a need to explain and justify everything; we have a need for knowledge, and we make assumptions to fulfill our need to know. We don’t care whether the knowledge is true or not. Truth or fiction, we believe 100 percent in what we believe, and we go on believing it, because just having knowledge makes us feel safe. There are so many things that the mind cannot explain; we have all these questions that need answers.

But instead of asking questions when we don’t know something, we make all sorts of assumptions. If we just ask questions, we won’t have to make assumptions. It’s always better to ask and be clear.
Original source

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So I ran into another old aquiantance, randomly, on the beach yesterday and stopped to catch up. We've both been on a journey of growth and disocvery for some years and the conversation moved, naturally, towards where we respectively are and what practices and perspectives we've disocvered. And are practicing. Of course.

He's one of the only humans on Facebook that engages with my content, by the way. The majority of the Trance scene are still too skittish. Or feel too ashamed and embarressed now... damned if you do and damned if you don't, huh?

The same goes for my family and once-were friends.

Which is exactly why I want to share the experience to help others not be afraid of their "dark". See?

It's this exact mechanism that was responsbile for me being unable to be heard. And for the destruction of my family and life, really. *The unconscious prejudice, bias and unresolved trauma of other people. And my own, in all truth.

Yeah... after fighting "the system" pointlessly for some years, I've come to the conclusion that the best way to "fight" back...

is to help others be less afraid of the dark!

Because if all of us had been more healed and awake...

I wouldn't even have this story to share.

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Anyhoo... back to the random meeting with the more fearless person on the beach yesterday.

He's one of the more grounded and less fearfulas a result of his own personal growth humans on Facebook who also isn't as afraid of the dark anymore either.

He's been practicing some more Buddhist orientated meditation, and philosophy, at the same center I first connected with, and then inevitably meandered away from, all those years ago. So I figured he'd also get my personal joke. 👇

At one point I began to laugh and said I wanted to make a post or statement on Facebook to say:

 

"Hey... You do know it's not me you're actually afraid of, don't you?

 

He didn't laugh.

So I said it again.

And then he got it.

And we laughed and laughed...

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This is a true story
Written for education and to, possibly, save lives.
Names have been changed to protect the innocent.
And the not so innocent.

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Eternal Seeker
Hardened Dreamer
Mother
Peaceful Warrior
Determined Dancer
and Stargazer

still...

Beyond fear is freedom

And there is nothing to be afraid of.

To Life, with Love... and always for Truth

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Featured image Photo by Isaque Pereira on Pexels. Image edited with GIMP.

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What was 18+ about it?

Just in case anybody went back to look and got a fright! :)