Where I come from, parenting is quite different from the way it is in advanced countries.
Our parents believe they must force you to do whatever they want you to do. They choose everything for their children including their friends, school, careers, including spouses.
That is how it has been only for those that are very exposed.
I have thought about the fact that what would I do if my child decide to choose another pattern different from what I have brought them up with. Would I disown the child or support them?
I think it all depends on what the child has changed to.
To me, parenting is not being rigid and unbending. Every child has their own mind and they have the privilege to choose and be whatever they want to become. A parent can only guide the child so that they wouldn't go astray but the decision is still left in the hands of the child to choose rightly as he has been taught.
While I was growing up in primary school, I had a friend who's parents are always taking good care of her so that she would be better in life. Her dad would always make her read her books every evening and we would watch her reading at the balcony. We envied her because it seems as if she was better off than us. She never comes out to play with us whenever her dad was around, but anytime we played together, I always noticed that she wants to explore.
Her parents were very Religious, respected and responsible people in the community. Our friend was their only daughter at that time. She was just pretending to be a good girl when her parents were around. While we got into senior secondary school, she brought out her real colours, forgetting everything her parents taught her.
She would sneak to parties, lie and steal. By this time, her parents had other children so, the attention was no longer on her alone.
She got pregnant out of wedlock for a boy her age who denied the pregnancy, while in senior secondary school. Her parents took care of her and she gave birth to the baby. One would think she would realize her mistake and do better but she didn't. She left the baby for her mom and continued her wayward lifestyle.
All this brings me to the point that it is not how far, but how well. One could actually force the horse to the river but you can't force a horse to drink water.
There are a lot of things out there these days that can influence a child negatively.
They could go to another country to study and there by learn a different culture from mine.
As a parent all I can do is teach my children the way of God and right attitude. To have good morals and good education. I will also keep praying that my children don't deviate from the path I have shown them. But if by any means, such a thing happens, I would not be happy and I would not support the child. I will try everything possible to make the child see reasons that he is in a wrong path, doing all in love. They are my responsibility and I will never watch them go astray. I will pray for the child until he change. I believe there is nothing God cannot do.
This is my response to Hive learners community weekly featured contents on the topic: A Changed Child
Thanks for stopping by, I really appreciate you. Let me know what you think about my stand on this in the comments.
Photos used are mine
Yours truly @aunty-tosin💕💕