There are different kinds of relationships between people or things and with all of these relationships, whether favorable or not, it involves two or more persons. A relationship is only called that because it doesn’t involve only one person. I grew up to hear about so many kinds of relationships that people keep and I have even seen some of them firsthand. Some relationships are friendly while some are really toxic but in both cases, you see people trying to stay anyways and this happens due to so many reasons and that is what I’ll be discussing in this blog.
The hivelearners topic for this week have asked us to share our thoughts on some possible reasons why people choose to remain in some toxic relationships and possible solutions to curb it. Personally for me, the bitter truth is that, some people just want to be the scapegoats that others will end up learning from and it’s sad if it is either you or me that will be in that position but then, other times, we really just got in and we don’t know how to leave. So, without further elaborating, let’s hear some reasons why anyone will stay in a toxic relationship.
First, let’s consider the relationship a tapeworm has with Man. Do you know that it takes a long time for you to know that a tapeworm lives inside you? This relationship is a parasitic one and man is the final host. What happens is that, when the tapeworm finds a way inside your body through some bad habits that you keep, like eating without washing your hands after using the toilet or eating a meat that is not properly cooked, these tapeworm survive very well inside the human body. It takes a very long time before you start knowing that you have been invaded.
Just like this relationship, so many of us are in similar situations. Just like a tapeworm, some people come into our lives in different ways due to the wrong environment, or choices we have made and somehow we didn’t even realize it until it’s too late. And at that point, we just have to look for ways to survive with them always. Because we failed to make some choices at the beginning, that ends up snatching away our rights of making choices later on. So, for some persons, they are in a toxic relationship because they have no more choices to make, at least that is what they think.
Another reason why some people choose to remain with bad people, is because they are finding it hard to let go of the past. They keep reminding themselves of the good things such a person has done for them and they think it would be unfair of them to just leave them. Sometimes, the culprits are the ones that even remind them of these pasts just to blackmail them to stay so they can continue what they’ve started. Personally for me, this is a red flag. Having someone in my life that keeps reminding me of the things they have done for me. And they hardly ever tell you about the things you’ve done for them.
Also, another reason why people find it hard to leave those toxic relationships is because of dependence on them. Most people are completely dependent on others to survive and because they are scared they will stop exist if their helper leaves, they keep trying to condole all their excesses. As little as it may sound, this is one of the major reasons why we let bad people stay in our lives. Just like the tapeworm, once it is inside the body, it sometimes feels almost impossible to get it out. And due to this fear, most people will choose to live with it because they are not sure if they will be lucky enough to get it treated.
But then, it’s all an illusion! There are so many ways to get rid of tapeworms from our body so that fear is just not valid. Staying in a toxic relationship because your life depends on that person is an illusion because guess what? If anything happens to that person today, you will still survive very well. But then, it can be really hard especially when you are not even sure how much danger such person is bringing to you.
These are just a few reasons why I feel people find it hard to leave those toxic relationships. But know that, for all of these, there is always a way out. But first things first, you have to acknowledge the fact that there is a problem somewhere and find a way to start fixing it. Because if you can’t see that the relationship you are building is a toxic one, no matter what others do to help you, you will always find yourself wanting to manage, thinking they will change.
Thanks for stopping by. ❤️
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