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“Now, Pop-Pop, as your grand-mogul and 21st century technology assistant, I do have to say here that you don't have to wait until Sunday to meet Capt. R.E. Ludlow. Zoom exists!”
Mr. Thomas Stepforth Sr., age 66, billionaire business mogul, smiled at his precocious nine-year-old grandson Vertran.
“I know it does, Vertran, but remember – no tradition makes sense to your mind because you are only nine. There are things that have to be done among old men that you will not understand for decades, but I'll try to bridge the gap for you. Suppose we cashed out your YouTube and Hive revenues for the year – would you just hand a big chunk of it to some random person on the street?”
Vertran considered this.
“If he really needed it, sure,” he said. “After all, the money will come back. We moguls know how to move money in at will.”
“I keep forgetting that although you are my fellow mogul, accounting of course for size, you really are just nine years old – of course you would,” Mr. Stepforth said, with a chuckle. “You get to be young and trusting for as long as you can, and I'm not going to mess with that in the slightest. Let me try it this way: am I going to let your baby siblings drive my car?”
“No, Pop-Pop, because if I can't reach the pedals, we know they can't.”
“Can they read the signs?”
“Pop-Pop, they can't read, period! If they figure out where the horn is, that's all we're getting!”
“So that's what it's like going into multi-million dollar business with someone you haven't fully checked out, except that you are locked in the car for the ride.”
“Oh, no, Pop-Pop, no one needs that kind of noise in their lives.”
“Which is why I need to meet Capt. Ludlow in person, not on Zoom,” Mr. Stepforth said. “As men we have to get the sense of other men, and to men our age – because he is only eight years younger than me – all this online stuff isn't real. Maybe we won't shake hands owing to the Covid situation, but I need to hear that bass voice he is famous for, and he needs to hear my baritone – that's part of measuring whether we as men can make beautiful business music together.”
“Got it, Pop-Pop. Gotta see if the voices can blend well.”
“In business, this is a light beginning to what is called due diligence, Vertran, which is what you do when you get ready to take on a new venture and new venture partners. Again, what you do not want is to get locked in the car – start signing contracts – with someone who doesn't know how to keep the car up or to drive.”
“I get it, Pop-Pop. There are a lot of people in the world who really are only good at honking the horn, so, yeah.”
“Too many people, Vertran.”
“Now if you ask me, and you didn't, but we're Stepforths, so we just step forth with what we think – the Ludlows do not seem to be horn-honking people. Even Robert, as much as he talks – there's a point to it. He's super smart, so much that his head can't hold his brain, so it is running out of his mouth – that's how Cousin Gracie explains it.”
“The Ludlows of your age indeed are not the horn-honking type,” Mr. Stepforth said, “but keep in mind that every family is like ours. You can know any number of Stepforths and still not be able to figure out even one from that, because people are individuals. And, keep this in mind: not being a horn honker doesn't mean you can drive. It just means that you're not a horn honker.”
“Got it, Pop-Pop. I see what you mean. Way too much to figure out just on Zoom.”
“Way too much, Vertran. Way too much.”
