You know what? I am weird, I am unpredictable with my senses and emotions. You might see everything going normal and the next moment things might not be the same, there are obviously some reasons behind them for sure. The unfortunate thing is, people don't even know what wrong they did and end up worsening the situation even more.
Here I am, to escape from the troubled night thoughts that aren't letting me sleep nor do anything but ache. Feeling extremely fu**ed up with my life whereas some daily chores are bugging me even more.
It's so unfortunate that people takes you for granted and make you do things as if you are bound to do them whereas you just wanted to help. There is a saying, “If you are good at it sometimes, don't do it for free.” I know that, but it's quite hard to implement everywhere. Some places are worth more than money, we act selflessly to help them, but when they backfire, it is the saddest moment to handle.
3 years ago, I wanted something and got that, but couldn’t utilise that properly and ended up somewhere else and for that I had to give up on my previous thing as well. The second choice brought some hard things for me, too many difficult choices and what not. Sometimes I do regret my decisions and the next moment I feel like, it's done, can't go back to undo so I need to think of the future and work on that. But the fact is, things on my shoulder are way heavier than I could carry. So far, going good, without any damage, but for how long? Only the Almighty knows. I am just praying and hoping for things to come around soon. To get easy on me.
Well, I had my choices, things had their own reason. But who knew life would get messed up so badly from all way, none. I fell in the well of endless struggles and hardships.
Do you believe in evil eyes? Like someone around you is jealous of your success, envy you, things like that? I guess these are real. I have seen people who stayed quiet and kept things secret getting succeeded in the end. I too am silent and quiet, I was. But yet, few things are meant for celebrations, right? Even those get envied. What more can I do? Some people are so jealous of others' prosperity that they would bring them down by jealousy, hell yeah!! These are so real. That's the reason I am cutting people out of my life, even the tiniest good things trigges them a lot. The best way to mark them is through seeing them backbiting someone else's success to you, just cut them off silently.
I will be careful of these from next time. Right now, nothing good is happening but there are better days, right? There are, otherwise what's left to live for? Nothing!! Literally nothing to live for.