Waking up to a cozy and faintly warm sun ray passing through slightly drawn curtains reminds me of you. In my past life, the room I used to live in had rarely ever seen any sunshine. The opaque decade-old dusty window panes never gave me much visibility of the greens outside. And the rust had eaten out the hinges in a certain way as if they were welded shut. It used to bother me in my earlier time residing here in this room. Then somehow, I got used to it.
To be truthful, I had never ever tried with an effort to open up my room to let in air or light as such until that day you came into my life. Now the light of the sun, the moon, and the northern wind traverse my room however it pleases them. Carrying along with fragrances of flowers and tree leaves I never really noticed. And what all these subtleties of life do is remind me only of you.
As I come out of the door, I see her waiting, like every other day. Long ears hanging low, mouth slightly open with her tongue out, she looks as if she is almost smiling. Unlike other street dogs, this one is very clean. I found her as a puppy right around the first time I met you. Now she is almost a year old.
My religiously conservative mother didn't let me keep her in the house as she was an unclean, unholy animal. So I kept her near the main gate in a wooden box for as long as she needed to learn how to find her own food. Feels like it was only yesterday when she was this wee little puppy. Whenever I come to meet with you, I buy her a cupcake. She likes sweet things very much. When I bring it out and start unwrapping it, she wiggles her tiny tail in happiness. I did so today too.
The kid sitting beside me right now is as fluffy as me, complexion as brown as mine looks like a younger version of me from my childhood. Occupied with some form of a paper figurine in his hand, he has no knowledge about the harsh reality around him. How everything around him is an ambush to snatch away his innocence at a moment's notice.
Unaware of life actually being the predator and him being the prey, he is now quite happy in his bubble. To be honest, it is quite satisfactory to even observe. Makes me forget about everything else for a moment. Wish I could be a kid in my mum's lap again. The world and all of its misery would be so far away from me then.
Getting off of the bus wasn't easy. I had to almost fight my way out. Public transportations in this country at peak hours tend to get highly overcrowded. These days, I try to avoid them solely for this reason, but my wallet, most of the time, is reluctant to cooperate. Don't like getting elbowed, stepped on and forced to smell unknown people's farts. But I have to comply as this way I can save a bit of money.
Finding a quiet corner in this godforsaken city and eating fresh food doesn't come cheap but being able to hold your hands makes it all worth it. You and I, we don't need much, do we? A few restaurant visits, roaming on and about here and there, are the only things about life I like these days. I hope you, too, share a mutual sentiment.
From afar, I see you, standing in grace. Eyes not fixed on anything, you seem a bit restless. You keep checking your watch again and again while I am still standing here, looking at you like a stalker.
I enjoy it a bit, you know, seeing you like this. All tensed up, waiting for me. Makes me feel adored, unlike ever. No one ever did what you do for this me, puny with no direction of life. And there you were, a perfectly disciplined, ambitious girl, yet you promised to leave everything behind only for me. I sometimes doubted your words, but seeing how your eyes light up in jest causes whatever distrust I have to wither away. I hope I get to grow old with you. I have this idea of me dying early. I hope it doesn't ever become a reality. If this is a dream, I would love to never be woken up.
