previous installments
Part 1: Help Me Find My Soulmate!
Part 2 of My Long, Painful, Humiliating, Crowd-sourced Ventriloquism Journey
Part 3: Dapper Dan Fills in My Gaps…
I'm procrastinating work on Part 4 of my journey into the ventriloquial arts. To kill time I've been doing some research into the background of the Doctor Who Looks Like Kevin Spacey (if you have no idea whom I'm talking about see Part 1: Help Me Find My Soulmate!) What I found is a rather impressive filmography spanning decades including these four films…
Casino Jack
The Man Who Won all the Cheese.
Meet Carl, an occasionally well-dressed, middle-aged loser. Carl runs golf cart, crash for cash, whiplash insurance scams. He has a tall woman fetish, but it's not a huge plot point. Legal fees have wiped him out after an ill-fated attempt at storming the capitol. He reinvents himself as a card counter. He has a legendary multi-week blackjack run, winning millions. Much to his chagrin he was unwittingly playing at one of Wisconsin's famous cheese casinos, specifically Casino Jack. The last hour is Carl dealing with 3 tons of Monterey Jack.
L.A. Confidential
Can a City Keep Your Secret?
Meet Carl, a well-dressed, middle-aged loser. He has a tall woman fetish. It's a secret. He told that secret to The City of Los Angeles, in confidence. L.A. couldn't keep the secret and now Carl is out for revenge. Using mesmerism he mind-controls two handsome men to shoot up the city. He mind-controls a third, much less attractive man to prank call the city. Neither technique proves to be an effective attack on a municipality. Carl dies of old age waiting for his diabolical plan to have any impact on L.A.
Margin Call
Courage is Calling. Margin Calling.
Meet Carl, a well-dressed, middle-aged loser. He and his five mostly taller buddies stand in front of some skyscrapers, staring into the distance. No explanation. This is seriously like the first two and half hours of the movie. Maybe it's an homage to Andy Warhol's Empire? Finally a pay phone (pay phone? WTF?) rings. Carl picks it up. A seductive voice whispers "margin." It was a margin call. Fade to black.
House of Cards
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You'll Never Believe What Causes Carl's GIANT Transformation.
Meet Carl, a well-dressed, middle-aged striver. Carl has one passion, building houses of cards. He builds, and builds, and builds. Building so hard his fingers bleed. He has no idea how to orient an American flag. It's a huge plot point, but I won't to spoil it. I'm not going to lie, I fell asleep in the middle of this one. I woke up in the last 5 minutes to a giant Carl storming Washington, destroying monuments. I have no idea why.
Stay tuned for Part 4 of my journey.
