Yesterday, my country Ukraine experienced a cyber attack and today, many people are waiting and watching to see what one man decides to do. I live in Ukraine and did not bother to check the news at all for days. Infact, the few times I was forced to check to see what was going on Twitter with certain key words(hashtags) was because my dad who lives in Nigeria and friends in other parts of the world were worried and calling me to ask about the situation. So it was because of that worry and not really a personal fear. Life here is normal, looks normal and feels normal, so it was amusing to me when I saw foreign nationals and the media share photos of people in Kyiv eating at restaurants or buying flowers and celebrating Valentine's day as a novelty. However, I cannot also ignore that there is another side to this view and maybe they are right to worry.
I say they are right to worry even though I personally have chosen not to because Ukraine is currently surrounded by troops and forces that can justifiably obliterate cities and wreck lives. It has happened before and this new threat is not just targeting a certain region in Ukraine, as was in the past, but the entire nation. Also, it did feel closer to home than usual when the banking apps stopped working yesterday. I was trying to order some food when it happened as well as waiting for my salary which I receive bi-weekly only to see the words 'server error'. After a while, I was able to successfully log in but my cards were not showing any amount. I was concerned because I don't carry cash around so seeing nothing on my cards is scary. I didn't have to worry too long as a few mins later, I could see the values and was able to order my food and received my salary.
Photo by Max Kukurudziak on Unsplash
This singular event spurred me to take some action like withdrawing some cash at the ATM today. It is not much but in my head, it's money that can reasonably pay for a train to somewhere. I am not anticipating that scenario even though my company which is based in the UK has said they're talking about some possible solutions that might involve relocation to close territories around us or internal migration from the East to the West of Ukraine for those in those regions. I'm luckily in the South West although the rest of my family is an hour thirty mins away from Kyiv so they are at the heart of the conflict should they be one. It is certainly good to know that such measures are in place and that option might be available. Also, they talked about cash pickups if necessary, like if banks stop working or the internet goes out. I can't imagine such a world after covid so I don't even want to entertain that possibility.
My feelings at this point as I've taken some time to educate myself on the current situation because I can only live with willful denial for so long, is that Putin really is currently the world's most important figure at this point. To carry so much power and have the world rest on your decision is not a position I'd like to be in. Especially since a judgement that results in destruction will forever weigh on your conscience. But hey, leaders are different people, and blood thirsty ones might not be easy to understand. At least for me. I don't understand why men are so invested in temporary lands or control to the extent of willingly sending missiles to places inhabited by children and happy families. Do they practice this visualization exercise because it truly makes me shudder when I think of how a man can give the order to strike if he's able to picture orphans, homeless and crippled men and women from his action.
I watched the Defense Secretary on YouTube say some minutes ago that we should not be fixated on dates if not we'd be prone to ask the question "so if we were wrong about the date today , does it mean we're wrong about the invasion?". I agree with him that the question should not be about dates or time but about actions. If there is a continuous build up at the borders of Ukraine and Putin's words do not tell a unified story with his actions, then the threat has not really diminished even with a missed date. It is still real until the situation deescalates.
I don't want a war, I'm tired of seeing memorials and structures built up to honor young soldiers in this country. I've lived in this country for the ten years and each year has had one of those. We've been through so much with covid and just when we need a breather to finally live, another heavy cloud wants to overshadow us. I really don't want that so I'm hopeful today, 16 Feb that Ukraine will not be invaded and a world war will be averted.
