If there's one thing I learned from my aunty's death, it is to always seize the moment because we do not know when it will be our last. Let's call her Lizzy.
My aunt Lizzy died 5 years ago during the Christmas holiday. We got to know of her death the following day after new year and men! That was one of the saddest days of my life.
Not a way I had expected to start the new year, but that was the tragedy that befell me and my family in 2020.
What pained me the most about her death was that she had called me to speak with my mom, as well as the rest of the family, and to wish us merry Christmas, but I didn't pick. I felt I will always call her back.
That day passed, a week also passed until it got to new year, and I'm like ok, I'll just call for new year, but I still did call on New Year's Day.
A day after new year, we got ready to go visit my other Aunts. Let us call them Mary and Suzy.
Preparing for our courtesy visit to my Aunts, I resolved to call aunt Lizzy when we get back.
On getting to Aunt Mary's, they weren't around, my uncle was the one home with aunt Suzy's children. He told us that Aunt Suzy stepped out, while aunt Mary went to work, but they'll be back soon, so we waited.
After a while, we heard a voice that sounded so familiar, wailing and lamenting from a distant. We didn't pay much attention to it, but the wail got louder like the person was coming to my aunts house.
We were confused as to why my aunt Suzy will cry like that because by now it was obvious that it's her. I felt maybe she got robbed, or could it be her husband? My heart sank as I prayed it shouldn't be anything serious.
Aunt Suzy and Aunt Mary both came into the house, with Aunt Suzy crying uncontrollably. The moment she got into the house, she swung herself to the floor and wailed! Aunty Suzy was going to hurt herself, and we kept consoling her, all effort to extract any information from her hit the rock and as for aunty Mary, she was trying so hard to hold her tears.
While we attended to aunt Suzy, My mom guided aunt Mary to a chair and started asking her calmly what happened, why are they in tears.
Aunt Mary, amidst tears, said Aunt Lizzy was dead this revelation came with an outburst and my mom immediately removed her head tie, sat on the floor and screamed.
I, on the other hand, did not know how to process the information because is this not someone I had wanted to call when I get home? I mean, she wasn't sick, so what do they mean that she is dead? Likewise, I did not know what to feel or how to feel.
I brought out my phone to dial her number but got no response. I reached out to my other Aunt whom they lived together abroad and got no response too, so I called my cousin and she picked. The tears in the background confirmed it for me, and I broke.
I didn't know what hurt most, that I will never see her again or that during her last moment she reached out to me, and I wasn't there.
I cried, but then whatever I had to say to her was already too late. Until today I still have her contact saved up on my phone, I still have her as my friend on Facebook because I cannot come to terms with the fact that she's gone.
My aunt's death came as a blow as it was unexpected, she was the major financier of the family and we later learned she died from too much work stress, especially during the winter. She was too aged for the sort of job she was doing and she didn't pay attention to her stress level.
Moving forward from my Aunts death, it became another lesson to me not to place my hope on anyone, as anything can happen. I also learned to take life easy and put myself first because the people one might feel they are responsible for, will always move on and survive without us.
Life doesn't stop with the death of one, so why should I live for others? Why should my life stop while alive, so others can enjoy theirs?
It's been five years since my aunt's demise, and all her siblings are doing so well, plus they have long moved on. I know they still feel her absence, but we barely talk about her anymore.
You know, it's really heartbreaking how quickly one becomes just a memory for personal consumption when they die.
Regardless of what I feel or how I felt, aunt Lizzy had no regrets fending for her younger ones and I could say from the way she loved giving that she lived a fulfilled life.
All images are mine
