Come on, admit it – most of us have felt so entitled at some point. I know I do. I have to admit that entitlement seems to have a negative connotation but in my opinion, it stems from people’s nature.
If I'm working hard or missing fun stuff just to meet a deadline, that makes me feel entitled. It costs me precious time that I cannot regain, darn it, so I should receive a promotion or raise for it. Don't we all? But we have to remember that other people also have to sacrifice something in this process. A good example of this is a friend of mine who codes at night whenever her kids are asleep. My entitlement isn’t greater than her tiredness.
I feel entitled when I struggle to make it through after losing something that would have crushed another person. After all the struggles I've had, I deserve a good grade or a good job. But everyone copes with stressful situations. Another friend of mine lost his mom last year, so in some ways he suffers more than I do. I should not compare our levels of suffering.
I feel entitled when I see my former classmates enjoying fancy vacations on social media. Of course, their glamorous life proves that I need to work my ass off, doesn’t it? But we all touch up our picture on the net. This is where comparing my day-to-day activities to someone’s highlight video makes no sense.
I feel entitled when I worry that my effort and skill will not be appreciated. I only expect to receive what is rightfully mine! However, we all look for appreciation in our own way. My need to be appreciated is not more important than my colleague’s need to have a family, or my friend’s need to have personal time.
I feel entitled when I need comfort from the world when it seems like it is hurling towards the dogs. Everyone desires security – that is organic. But the same must also be done to others as well as to ourselves. That is the reality that everyone is dealing with now – uncertainty. As you can see, this expresses the fact that if we stand together and support each other's efforts, we will be able to overcome this problem.
Can you make some sense of it? Entitlement stems from the need to be appreciated. But we remain blinded by our own needs and forget that everyone has their own perspective as well. I believe that as long as we try to achieve what is rightfully ours and learn what the other person deserves, then we can prevent entitlement from turning toxic. We have to understand that we all face the same problems. There's no competition between people's suffering or desires. One needs to understand that everyone is only human, and one can get it wrong sometimes.
Image credit: Jessica Ossom (All photos are mine)