My husband's footsteps - The Ink Well fiction Prompt # 110

in #hive-1707982 years ago

Malgret and Victor Arismendi, a married couple with two children, Clauds and Cesar, lived in a two-story house. Upstairs there was an attic and downstairs there were three bedrooms, a living room, dining room, bathroom and laundry room.

Victor was a smoker, Malgret always told him.

My love, stop smoking, I want to be married to you for 40 years".

Victor ignored Malgret's words, he only answered.

I have to die of something.

And so time went by. One night, when everyone was asleep, Victor got out of bed, he said to Malgret:

"Malgret, I feel a tightness in my chest."

She ignored him and continued sleeping. Victor, very agitated by the pain, said to his wife:

" Malgret, please call Clauds and Cesar, to take me to the doctor, I don't feel well".

His wife suddenly saw him, got worried, got up and called her sons, and explained the situation to them. They immediately acted, while Cesar started the car, Clauds looked for his father together with his mother, they took him to the car. When they arrived at the clinic, the doctor saw him, he was operated on and given intensive care, it was a very convulsive early morning. Two hours later, the doctor gave them the bad news that Mr. Victor Arismendi had died of a heart attack. The grief that overwhelmed the family was imminent, however, Clauds and Cesar overcame the situation. They waited until dawn
to organize everything related to the funeral burial. The next day they arranged everything and proceeded to bury their father.

Malgret, devastated by the physical departure of her life partner, wept all over the house. At night, as she slept, she would hear someone putting on Victor's sandals and walking around the house. One night she got out of bed, she thought it was César who had put on her father's cholas, when she looked around the house she realized that no one was there.

Every space in the house reminded her of her loved one, when she made the meal she cried with sadness and said:

"Victor, why did you leave me alone, where are you, why don't you take me with you?".

And so the days went by, Malgret was still grieving, with mourning in her heart. Another night the widow felt Victor's footsteps again, for a moment she thought her beloved was wandering around the house, she got out of bed, went to the living room and said:

"Victor, is that you, are you here, have you come looking for me?".

He walked towards the stairs leading to the attic, when he got there, he saw a bright light coming from the stairs. A sound of sandal steps and the silhouette of a gentleman. He felt his heart beating like a locomotive inside his chest, so much so that he was out of breath, as best he could he shouted:

"Victor, I want to go with you but not yet, I miss my children."

When she finished speaking in despair, she heard Cesar's voice:

"Mom, what's wrong with you, I was putting some things away in the attic, you won't believe it was my father walking around the house, the dead don't come out".

Her mother, very distressed, said to her:

"Well, believe it or not I thought it was your father".

César accompanied Malgret to her bed and took care of her that night until she fell asleep.

https://pixabay.com/es/photos/mujer-fantas%c3%ada-bosque-magia-2961723/

This is a fiction story.
Use the deepl translator.
Use Google Docs.
The image is from pixabay.

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This is a very touching story, @lrscarmen. It's sad that Victor did not listen to his wife and take care of his health while he had the chance.

Note that there are some pronoun errors that reduce the quality of the story. Please try to review your stories and catch these before posting. When you are referring to men, it should be "he," "him" and "his." When you are referring to women, it is "she," "her, and "hers."

This scene comes at a critical point in the story when you have created suspense, and we wonder if the husband has returned as a ghost. But the suspense is deflated because the wife is referred to as a man. All of the bold words should be either "she" or "her."

He walked towards the stairs leading to the attic, when he got there, he saw a bright light coming from the stairs. A sound of sandal steps and the silhouette of a gentleman. He felt his heart beating like a locomotive inside his chest, so much so that he was out of breath, as best he could he shouted:

Anyway, it is otherwise a good story. Thank you for sharing it in The Ink Well, and for reading and commenting on the work of other community members.