Fiction: Words that save. Fictional short story. Original Content. EN/ESP.

in #hive-1707987 months ago

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It was a Saturday afternoon, and Andrés and Johana, had just arrived home from a meeting with some friends, they were feeling very good, and they were very happy, because having gone to have fun and share with other people, had helped them eliminate the work stress of the week.

Andrés decided to make a light meal for dinner, and then made popcorn, since both of them had decided to watch a film before going to bed, in order to finish their Saturday with a hunting activity, since Andrés and Johana, as a rule, had to spend the most amount of time together at home, in order to strengthen their relationship, since they had little time living together.

When they were on the couch watching TV, Andrés fell asleep and placed his head on Johana's legs. She, she kept watching the film, she was very into the plot, and she couldn't stop watching the screen, she really was very into the film, in fact she didn't notice at first that Andrés was talking while she was sleeping.

But after a while, Andrés, besides talking, began to move as if he were having a nightmare, it was at that moment when Johana, realized that Andrés, was talking while he was sleeping and that he was also quite restless for his dream.

Johana decided to turn down the TV volume a little and listen to what was bothering Andrés in his dream. And when Johana lowered her face to bring her ear closer to Andrés and to be able to hear what he was saying, she heard him say "You must stop running after the ball, be careful on the avenue. Protect the child.”

Andrés repeated the phrase several times, while Johana looked at him curiously. When the film was over, Johana woke up her boyfriend with a lot of love and told him that it was time for both of them to go to bed. Andrés stretched out, yawned and after a while he got up and went with Johana to the room

—You know, while you were sleeping on the couch, you had a bad dream, and besides you talked in your sleep. — Johana commented.

Andrés stuck his head out the bathroom door, where he was washing his face and asked Johana, Is it serious, I really talked in my sleep?
— Well yes, you talked in your sleep and said this "You should stop running after the ball, be careful on the avenue. Protect the child”. —

—That's weird, what you're telling me, besides you've never told me that I was talking in my sleep.— Said Andres.

—Well, actually, you've never talked in your sleep before, although you do snore like a pig. — Said Johana, while laughing.

At night, while they were sleeping, Andrés started having the nightmare again and started talking in his sleep, but this time he said more things, he talked about a park, about children playing, he talked about animals and named the contents of a sign, which was in a park near a bank, which was close to the exit, towards the main avenue.

On Sunday morning, when they got up, Johana told Andrés everything he had said at night, and the anguish she had while sleeping. When they sat down to breakfast, Johana followed by commenting on the situation of the previous night. And after talking for a long time, both decided to go to the park that was close to the place where they lived, and investigate if there was anything related to Andrés' nightmares.

They both went to the park, and the two looked like a couple of detectives doing research, they were looking for each of the clues that Andrés had commented in his dreams, little by little they were seeing each of the details that he had commented.

Now, both Andrés and Johana were distressed, they knew that everything they were experiencing was not part of a nightmare, but was a reality, announced to Andrés in a dream.

Now they both knew that the life of a child, or of several children, was in their hands, and that was so, because Andrew had been guided there, by an invisible force, through his dreams.

Now, they felt responsible and distressed, and both of them were looking, without stopping, for the advertisement that was next to a bank and near an exit to the avenue, which was mentioned, in what Andrés was saying while he was sleeping. Hoping that the children were playing there, so that they could prevent the serious event that Andrés was narrating while he was talking in his sleep.

After walking almost the entire park, and already, when they were about to give up, they saw an advertisement next to a bank, when they approached the bank, they saw that there was an exit, towards a main avenue, they both saw each other in the face.

—I think this is the place of the dream.— Said Andres.

—Yes, I think so too.— Said Johana.

But when they looked around, they didn't see any children near the bank. Only, there was a group of children playing football, in a field inside the park, which was, crossing a small internal street, in front of the advertisement, but Andrés and Johana, did not see a risk in that area of the park.

And while Johana and Andrés were still talking, a soccer ball rolled by in front of them, and behind the ball, two children were running to get the ball.

When Andrés looked down the avenue, he saw that a rubbish truck was coming down it.

Andrés didn't think about it, at that moment he heard the voice of his dream that said “Protect the child” and without thinking, he ran out and jumped to grab the child, before he stepped on the avenue. As they did so, both Andrés and the boy saw how the rubbish truck hit the ball.

The truck driver got out very nervously, thinking that he had run over the boy, who was coming running after the ball. But when he saw that Andrés was holding the child on the side walk, he calmed down and tears began to come out of his eyes, since the fright had been very big, for the driver.

Andrés saw how the other children arrived and the adults who were with the group of the child he had in his arms. After a while, everyone left and Andrés was left alone with Johana, they were both walking through the park, but without saying a word.

Andrés, without saying anything, stopped walking, Johana, looked at him and without saying a word, hugged him very tightly, while Andrés did the same, and he told her how crazy that experience had been, that they had lived.

—Yes, it really was a very strange situation, thanks to life, you were there, to listen to what I was saying in the dream. — Said Andrés.

—Actually my dear, I hope you keep snoring like a little pig, and that you don't keep talking in dreams any more, I don't want another day like this. — She said, Johana funnily, as they both started walking to go home, holding hands.

Thank you for reading me.


Translated with www.DeepL.com/Translator (free version)


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Palabras que salvan. Cuento de ficción. Contenido Original. ESP/EN.


Era un sábado en la tarde, y Andrés y Johana, acababan de llegar a su casa, de una reunión con unos amigos, se sentían muy bien, y ellos estaban muy contentos, ya que el haber ido a divertirse y compartir con otras personas, les había ayudado a eliminar el estrés laboral de la semana.

Andrés decidió hacer una comida ligera para la cena, y después hizo palomitas de maíz, ya que ambos habían decidido ver una película antes de dormir, para así terminar su sábado con una actividad cacera, ya que Andrés y Johana, tenían como norma, pasar la mayor cantidad de tiempo juntos en casa, para así ir fortaleciendo su relación, ya que tenían poco tiempo viviendo juntos.

Cuando estaban en el sofá viendo la televisión, Andrés se quedó dormido y colocó su cabeza en las piernas de Johana. Ella, seguía viendo la película, estaba muy metida en la trama, y no podía dejar de ver la pantalla, realmente estaba muy metida en la película, de hecho no notó en un principio que Andrés estaba hablando mientras dormía.

Pero después de un rato, Andrés, además de hablar, empezó a moverse como si tuviese una pesadilla, fue en ese momento cuando Johana, se dio cuenta de que Andrés, estaba hablando mientras dormía y que además estaba bastante inquieto por su sueño.

Johana decidió bajar un poco el volumen del televisor y escuchar lo que tanto intranquilizaba a Andrés en su sueño. Y cuando Johana bajo su rostro para acercar su oído a Andrés y poder escuchar lo que decía lo oyó decir, “Debes dejar de correr tras la pelota, cuidado en la avenida. Protege al niño”.

Andrés repitió la frase varias veces, mientras Johana lo miraba con curiosidad. Cuando se acabó la película, Johana despertó a su novio con mucho cariño y le dijo que ya era hora de que ambos se fueran a la cama. Andrés se estiró, bostezó y después de un rato se levantó y se fue junto con Johana al cuarto

—Sabes, mientras dormías en el sofá, tuviste un mal sueño, y además hablaste dormido. — comentó Johana.

Andrés sacó su cabeza por la puerta del baño, donde se estaba lavando la cara y le preguntó a Johana, ¿Es en serio, realmente hablé dormido?

—Pues sí, hablaste dormido y dijiste esto, “Debes dejar de correr tras la pelota, cuidado en la avenida. Protege al niño”.—

—Qué raro, eso que me comentas, además nunca me habías dicho que yo hablaba dormido. — Dijo Andrés.

—Bueno, realmente, nunca habías hablado dormido, aunque sí roncas como un cochino. — Dijo Johana, mientras reía.

En la noche, mientras dormían, Andrés empezó a tener de nuevo la pesadilla y comenzó a hablar dormido, pero esta vez decía más cosas, hablaba de un parque, de niños jugando, hablaba de animales y nombraba el contenido de un letrero, que estaba en un parque cerca de un banco, que estaba cercano a la salida, hacia la avenida principal.

En la mañana del domingo, cuando se levantaron, Johana, le comentó a Andrés todo lo que él había dicho en la noche, y la angustia que tenía mientras dormía. Cuando se sentaron a desayunar, Johana, le siguió comentando la situación de la noche anterior. Y después de conversar durante un buen rato, ambos decidieron ir al parque que estaba cercano al lugar donde vivían, e investigar si había algo relacionado con las pesadillas de Andrés.

Ambos fueron al parque, y los dos parecían una pareja de detectives haciendo pesquisas, iban buscando cada una de las pistas que Andrés había comentado en sus sueños, poco a poco fueron viendo cada uno de los detalles que él había comentado.

Ahora, tanto Andrés como Johana, estaban angustiados, sabían que todo lo que estaban viviendo, no era parte de una pesadilla, sino que era una realidad, anunciada a Andrés en un sueño.

Ahora ambos sabían, que la vida de un niño, o de varios niños, estaban en sus manos, y eso era así, debido a que Andrés había sido guiado hasta allí, por una fuerza invisible, a través de sus sueños.

Ahora, se sentían responsables y angustiados, y ambos, buscaban, sin parar, el anuncio que estaba junto a un banco y cerca de una salida a la avenida, que se mencionaba, en lo que decía Andrés mientras dormía. Esperando, que ahí estuviesen los niños jugando, para poder impedir el suceso grave, que narraba Andrés, mientras hablaba dormido.

Después de recorrer casi todo el parque, y ya, cuando estaban a punto de rendirse, vieron un anuncio al lado de un banco, cuando se acercaron al banco, vieron que había una salida, hacia una avenida principal, ambos se vieron a la cara.

—Creo que este es el lugar del sueño. — Dijo Andrés.

—Sí, yo también lo creo. — Dijo Johana.

Pero cuando vieron los alrededores, no vieron a ningunos niños cerca del banco. Solamente, había un grupo de niños jugando al fútbol, en un terreno dentro del parque, que estaba, cruzando una pequeña calle interna, frente al anuncio, pero Andrés y Johana, no veían un riesgo en esa área del parque.

Y mientras Johana y Andrés, seguían hablando, una pelota de fútbol, pasó rodando frente a ellos, y detrás de la pelota, venían dos niños corriendo a buscar la pelota.

Cuando Andrés miró hacia la avenida, vio que un camión de basura venía trasladándose por ella.

Andrés no lo pensó, en ese momento escucho la voz de su sueño que decía “Protege al niño” y sin pensarlo, salió corriendo y brincó para agarrar al niño, antes de que este pisará la avenida. Al hacerlo, tanto Andrés como el niño, vieron como el camión de basura piso la pelota.

El conductor del camión se bajó muy nervioso, pensando que había atropellado al niño, que venía corriendo detrás de la pelota. Pero al ver, que Andrés sostenía al niño en la acera, se tranquilizó y comenzaron a salir lágrimas de sus ojos, ya que el susto había sido muy grande, para el chófer.

Andrés vio como llegaron los otros niños y los adultos que estaban con el grupo del niño que tenía en los brazos. Después de un rato, todos se fueron y Andrés se quedó solo con Johana, ambos estaban caminando por el parque, pero sin decir una palabra.

Andrés, sin decir nada, dejó de caminar, Johana, lo miró y sin decir ni una palabra, lo abrazó con mucha fuerza, mientas Andrés hacía lo mismo, y él le decía lo loca que había sido esa experiencia, que habían vivido.

—Sí, realmente fue una situación muy extraña, gracias a la vida estabas allí, para escuchar lo que decía en el sueño. — Dijo Andrés.

—En realidad mi querido, espero que sigas roncando como un cochinito, y que ya no sigas hablando en los sueños, no quiero otro día como este. — Dijo, Johana de manera chistosa, mientras ambos comenzaron a caminar para ir a casa, tomados de la mano.

Gracias por leerme.


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This is an engaging story, @osomar357. It has a strong arc. The idea that a dream is a revelation, or premonition, is quite usual. Most often, though this idea doesn't bear out. In the case of your characters, the dream was prophetic. The detail about the truck driver was an effective touch. It really helped to paint the scene for us.

One thing you might do when writing stories and translating them into English is check sentence structure. It seems to be that often a story translated from Spanish will run on. That is, instead of periods breaking up a paragraph into distinct thoughts, there is a string of thoughts. Look at your first and second paragraphs, for example.

The story is interesting and well planned. Just a little tweaking (such as adding periods) would improve the piece stylistically. Thank you for sharing this with us.

Hi @thinkwell, glad you liked the post.
It seemed important to me to put the image of the driver, and of the feelings that the situation caused him.
I will take into account the advice you give me, I will also separate the paragraphs more before placing them in the translator, since there are times that it joins.
Thank you very much for the comment.
Happy Sunday.

Wow. Dreams. Revelations. It's was satisfying that Johana was there to listen to Andres' talking in his dream since this singular act saved the child from being crushed by the truck. This was a beautiful read.

Hi @sabrinah, I'm glad you liked the post.
Thank you very much for the comment.
Happy Sunday.

This was a lovely read. Johanna helped saved the child by the listening to Andres. Dreams are power and in many instances, just like this, it gives the snippet of real life expectations.

It's so nice that they both knew the outcome of the dream would be like this. Thank goodness that they traced the playground and saved the child.

It's good that they were given the chance to help save a life. They had a stressful day, but it was worth it!

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