The Ink Well Prompt #53 - A CLOUDY FALL

in #hive-1707983 years ago

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No! Please! Let me in! You must let me in”.

You are not ready”, a thundering voice rang as Daniel was swept off his feet and dragged all through the gates. Daniel was resolute...he would fight with every being of him or at least what was left of him.

Daniel struggled and tussled and clawed while attempting to hold on but somehow he couldn’t despite all the strength he had once thought he possessed. It was as though he was fighting with the wind or a cloud or shadows.

Come when your deeds measure up”, the voice roared once more accompanied by hums that neither encouraged hope nor instilled fear.

On seeing the gate almost shut completely, Daniel called forth all the strength he could muster. This was his last chance to survive...to escape the horror he would go through if he returned.
As the gate closed shut, Daniel felt the hope drain from within him as he was dragged towards the edge. On looking down, he realized how much he didn't want to go back but didn't have the strength to fight even though he seriously contemplated it.

As Daniel contemplated what next to do, he heard a whisper saying, “we wrestle not against flesh and blood”. He quickly turned around to see his assailants fully clad in golden armour, their faces shone brightly as headlights would in a dark night, fiery crowns laid atop their heads and dress akin to the clouds he had seen countless times during his travels adorned them.

No...please, I am begging you”, Daniel cried once more, while attempting to kneel. “I can't go back, please. You have no idea what it is like. The pain is unbearable”.

They both looked silently at Daniel for what was a minute but felt like an eternity. A deafening silence only intermittently broken by Daniel’s cries. They then looked back towards the gate as Daniel continued his appeal and suddenly tossed him off the steep.

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Daniel shouted and screamed as he fell. It was a fall that characterized his entire existence. An arduous childhood, a crippling sense of insecurity that fostered an inability to enjoy any semblance of companionship. A dissent to drinking that employers always badgered him about which only resulted in more bottles. Drugs were the last resort to feel anything different from what he had always felt and it worked...for so long it worked until it didn’t.

The further Daniel fell from the cloudy heights, the better he felt. He was at peace as he felt the silent, but gushing winds interrupt his very soul. It was as quick and as still and as calm and quiet as that one time in the woods. That day at the woods felt different...better, as if he was one with nature, as though the things that made him weary had melted away into nothingness.

That day the feeling of satisfaction and tranquility gradually eroded just like Daniel feared it would, replaced by the persistent hunger he usually felt when he needed a fix. That tingling feeling at the back of his head that gradually scratched his thoughts until it unraveled his mind. He would do anything for a syringe.

As Daniel fell, all flashed through his eyes. He wished it could all end. Nothing was worse than a return. As he got closer and closer to the ground a feeling of dread enveloped him and he closed his eyes for the inevitable.

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A sudden car honk startled Daniel from his trance as he opened his eyes to find himself in the middle of the highway. The headlights of the oncoming truck held unto Daniel, his body unable to move, as if he had been caught in the tractor beam of a UFO.

Get out the way!”, the driver screamed through the window at Daniel as he sped past him.

Still shocked, Daniel looked around. The quietness only drowned by the sound of crickets singing a lullaby to the night’s moon.

Daniel sat on the road, hopeful for another truck.


A SNAP FOR YOU

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Wow. Your command with the words amazes me.

He quickly turned around to see his assailants fully clad in golden armour, their faces shone brightly as headlights would in a dark night, fiery crowns laid atop their heads and dress akin to the clouds he had seen countless times during his travels adorned them.
Superb description and use of the prompt word. Love it.

Well done.

This is great.

Una nueva oportunidad de vida para Daniel.

¿Estamos seguros de que Daniel quiere eso? Gracias por hacer esta historia más dulce con tu comentario.

Ohhh definitely makes me think 😉🤔

It is an incredible story and many times it resembles reality.

You are an amazing writer my friend, I was tuned in till the end.

I feel for him though, I understand wanting to give up so it's sad because he is forced to live.

Thanks @khaleesii. You also write great.

Thank you, you are far too kind.

Man what a dream i had... 🙃

🤣🤣🤣🤣 do tell.

you just did... 😁

@silentbot star 4

Danké

Congratulations, @piratethanos. Your story is featured in The Ink Well weekly highlights magazine: https://peakd.com/hive-170798/@theinkwell/the-ink-well-highlights-magazine-42. Thank you for sharing your work in The Ink Well.

Thanks for this. I'm super happy.

What a great story man! It was well written and I could really feel his need to destroy himself.

And also,

Daniel sat on the road, hopeful for another truck.

Why is this so funny to me? :)

Uhmm... Because your sense of humour is just something else? Hahahahaha

That...is beautiful. Wait. He was trying to commit suicide? The way you talked about the hosts of heaven... Awesome! Awesome!! Awesome!!!

A cartoon can be made out of this! Haha

A cartoon huh? I love the way you always put a cute little joke in all your write up.

😅😅😅😅... I only reply with what I feel. 😂

You'd make a wonderful compere.

Why thank you kind sir...💕

You...

Me what??? 😏

Electronic-terrorism, voice to skull and neuro monitoring on Hive and Steem. You can ignore this, but your going to wish you didnt soon. This is happening whether you believe it or not. https://ecency.com/fyrstikken/@fairandbalanced/i-am-the-only-motherfucker-on-the-internet-pointing-to-a-direct-source-for-voice-to-skull-electronic-terrorism

This a really well written piece of work, seems like a good prompt too, I have an idea for it at the moment, I'm going to get it written and enter it.

You need to. I can't wait to see what you do with it.

Fabulously descriptive, marvelous stuff there...WoW, great writing. Excellent portal of desperation, stunning come back. Wonderful!

You weave a wonderful story of a desperate man trying to commit suicide, delving into his altered reality in a capturing and suspenseful way. With an ending that didn't fail to deliver. His time has not come yet it seems.

Thank you for sharing this delightful story with us. We appreciate that you engage with other writers in The Ink Well community.

@theinkwell gives me a good opportunity to hone my writing skills. The prompt is a good way to improve one's skill and ability to improvise.

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Fantastic work! With your writing, you've created an incredible story of a desperate guy trying suicide and his journey into his transformed reality, which is both engaging and suspenseful. With a satisfying climax to cap it all off.

Thanks a lot. Do you think he'll do it?

He want to be free of his earthly suffering, but it appears that his time has not yet come. I really feel for him.

Some people are on the precipice. All they need is a push. Hopefully instead of a push, they'll be pulled back.

What a different sort of story, @piratethanos. I was both charmed by and saddened for our poor protagonist and his desire to move on to the next life, and be free of his earthly pain.

I thought it was great how you started the story with action, and then gave us the background, once we were already hooked by the story!

Daniel shouted and screamed as he fell. It was a fall that characterized his entire existence. An arduous childhood, a crippling sense of insecurity that fostered an inability to enjoy any semblance of companionship. A dissent to drinking that employers always badgered him about which only resulted in more bottles. Drugs were the last resort to feel anything different from what he had always felt and it worked...for so long it worked until it didn’t.

This describes the experiences of many who suffer childhood distress, lifelong insecurity and the desire to numb the pain with substances. We can only hope that something about being on that lonely road, waiting for a truck to end his life, will help him to find new resolve and a new purpose. If not, he'll be back at the gate!

There has been an increased rate of suicide where I'm from. I can't say for certain if it's a global increase though. Everyone - I think - should see life as sacred and for one to even attempt to take his/her's is quite sad. We need to do more to help people. Actual help not just give money (even though money goes a long way).

Thanks @jayna. You always got me conversing on another level anything you make your insightful comments.