My name is Ameh Victoria Ilebaye. I am from Kogi State in Nigeria. I just graduated from a university in Nigeria where I studied petroleum engineering. Funny story is, yes I have always wanted to be an engineer, but i never really saw myself studying Petroleum Engineering.
I always wanted to be an electrical engineer because at a very early stage in my life, I developed this irresistible love for electronics and electrical appliances, I was fixing almost all our electrical issues at home.
Many persons say I am very smart and intelligent a compliment I have come to enjoy and appreciate. But, I like to think of myself more than anything as a young girl blessed with exceptional gifts and talents, a human being who loves life and appreciates every second of it, a lover of God and a happy feminist a status I have tried to deny for a long time. I said a happy feminist because the society I come from have been able to place a stigma on feminists as sad people.
I will not be wrong if I address myself as the girl with nine lives because I have had my fair share of life shaping experiences and came out of them a better person with more strong will and resilience.
I started writing very early in life and I found expression in writing. As a young girl, i was the very timid and shy type of girl, one who would get bullied easily, one who was too scared to speak up for herself, so instead of talking most times, I wrote. I would cry and write. I remember I got so obsessed with writing that I wrote on almost every surface at home and this landed me in lots of trouble with my mum. Most avid writers are said to be great readers and this is not far from the truth, because I enjoyed reading as much as I did writing.
I could stay an entire day without talking to anyone or even stepping out of my room, i was an intense introvert who enjoyed her own company better than I did with the company of others.
I would be in my room reading virtually anything I could lay my hands on, from novels, books on motivation, history books, newspapers to books on religion.. while I read these books, i learnt to write from them. I have written pieces that i have never shared with anyone. This is my major concern at the moment, hence why i am grateful to @gone-hive for introducing me to this platform where I hope to learn to share my writings more.
My outward appearance at first glance may show a very strong young lady, full of life and all, but in reality I am really about a very quiet life filled with lots of love and attention from loved ones, family and friends. I love love and would like to think of myself as a hopeless romantic, one who in Nigeiran pidgin language is termed a "mumu for love ". Although this made me choose solitude most times because I felt with a heart like mine, i could become very vulnerable and so for a very long time in my life, I didn't make friends. I could count just a person or two outside family that I called friend.
I did not know how i would survive a heart break, so I did not get into a relationship or experience any of those childhood love memories that most of my friends now talk about. Eventually I had to come out of my shell. I remember saying to myself " you would never know most things till you try" , I mean experience they say is the best teacher. So I started giving people a chance into my life. At first, it was not easy, it still is not so easy for me. I had a hard time coping, I would not know what what say in a conversation or end up saying the wrong things when I tried. But once I found my safe space, my comfort zone and my safe humans, i realised that the best form of love can be those from people who genuinely care about you.
I am a very orthodox human being, call me ancient if you may. I do not live my life following trends. I can stick to old things for as long as they suit my belive. This has really helped my Christian life, because even with the many noise about Christianity and God these days, I have remained focused and fervent in the practice of my faith. I love God, I believe he exists and I also believe he loves me and watches over me.
I am a big beliver in fate. I do not believe that life just happens. I would like to think that things happen because why have been predestined to happen that way. This has given me courage, solace and hope for a better tomorrow. I mean going to bed with the mindset that my life and things that could possibly happen in it does not depend on me solely but depends solely on fate and predestination. I may be wrong but this believe makes me sleep well at night.
I love food, lol, yes I genuinely love food, not just food but good food, hence why I decided to up my culinary skills by learning how to make amazing meals, cakes and pastries. I could cook an entire day and not get tired, lol. I literally volunteer for cooking most times because I enjoy cooking as much as I enjoy eating good food.
I like to live life on my own terms, I hate a drama filled life and I would always feel very embarrassed and hide in my room for hours or days crying when I have a physical altercation with someone. I cry a lot, I cry easily. I guess it is my own way of expressing my emotions or how I feel about a particular situation. Most people call it weakness, but I see strength in my tears. When i am angry about something and I cry, I tend to get over it easily and this has helped me become someone who does not keep grudges. Yes I could distance myself from the people who hurt me for some time for the sake of my mental health, but when I see them again, it's all love.
I have lots of aspirations in life, I have always wanted to be a well known public speaker and writer like Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, lol, I'm crazy about her. I have also always wanted to be a diversified entrepreneur. Currently I own a food page on Instagram where I display my foods for sale. I am also very much interested in women's right and gender based issues and because of this I started a podcast last month on Spotify called "PearlTalks" where I talk about everyday life issues, particularly as it affects women.
I just want to live a life of purpose, I have dreams of owning NGOs and schools for the poor and disabled people in the future. This dreams and aspirations of mine are born from the saying that " a life lived for others is the best form of life".
I hope this counts for an introduction, lol, because I could go on and on about myself and not finish. So, if you made it this far, thank you for not getting bored. Thank you for reading.
