It’s that time of the year where we hear a lot of “next year by this time” and I can’t wait to laugh my heart out. I have a Christmas family event coming up so I was talking to my cousin about it and she said she’s trying to miss the event. When she told me why, I couldn’t stop laughing but I was a little bothered.
Our moms and their sisters married very early so during these events, I’m guessing you know what happens. You pass here and you’re hearing next year by this time, we’ll be coming for your wedding. Next year by this time you’ll be carrying your child. I find it very funny because what do you mean next year by this time I’ll be in my husband’s house?
You can’t even eat in peace. You try dishing a plate and they come telling you that next year by this time, you’ll be holding two plates, one for you , one for your husband. You do this and they do that. You pass here and husband everywhere. No breathing space. Aunty please you and that husband all should rest, respectfully.
You know the funny part, they were the same people telling us years ago to focus on ourselves because at the right time, the right men will come. And during those times, you dare not bring even a male friend to those family events. Last year, I spent the Christmas traveling with my dad so I wasn’t able to go for the annual family event but last two years, I went with a male friend and guess what? They interviewed him from all angles. Maybe the word “interview” is even an understatement.
They asked him so many questions to the extent that we had to fake an emergency call for him to leave. Imagine one of my male cousins even asking him of his shoe size. What exactly has his shoe size got to do with anything? And he was even just a genuine friend. Not a boyfriend or anything with feelings attached.
My male cousins put him under scrutiny like someone in possession of cocaine at the airport. Those were the same people going up and down with “next year….husband”. I wonder where exactly they think the husband will come from.
I can’t wait for 31st to go and let them bleed my ears out again. Maybe this time, they probably have already prepared a husband there waiting for me if not, that house won’t contain us at all. I really can’t wait for my aunty to play the when “I was your age, I was married” card so that I say whatever I’ve been preparing to tell her since January.
Image is mine
