What True Respect Means

In my culture, they say kneeling to greet an elder isn't a sign of good character, it must be shown in your actions. This is because most people fake their character in public while they are something else in private. This statement reflects a key aspect of respect especially within societies that place high regard/value on gestures and traditions.

While kneeling to greet elders has been one cultural practice that has been on for a longer time in most parts of the world, it is just a layer of what respect looks like. It is easy for a person to confuse such an outward demonstration for genuine respect, but the truth is that respect lies within how we treat others, especially in areas where we have to remove cultural rituals or practices away from it.

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To me, respect goes beyond just the normal and usual gestures and greetings. It is about understanding the dignity of every human being and treating them with kindness, sincerity, consideration, and empathy, not with contempt. It is about giving regards to people we come across with, relate with and have things in common with, irrespective of who they are, their age or their position in society.

When we respect someone, we acknowledge their presence, value their opinions, and understand their efforts and where they are coming from through their perspectives. This can be seen in the way we listen attentively with an undivided mind and even how we respect their boundaries.

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Another way to view respect is acknowledging that everyone deserves to be treated with dignity, equality, decency, and fairness, not because of their age, status, or title, but because they are also human beings with feelings just like us. I believe it is when we treat the other person as we want to be treated that brings about respect.

There is one thing I dislike, and it is when my opinions are dismissed without consideration. I feel disrespected in this way, not because someone didn't greet me properly or follow social etiquette, it's like devaluing my presence and not fairly treating me. This made me realise that for many people, disrespect is more about how they are made to feel invisible or irrelevant rather than whether someone bowed, knelt or used formal titles.

Seriously, if you have been in a situation where your points became meaningless while someone else's own were given high consideration because of how they are seen or given regard to, you will realise that it isn't the lack of gestures that hurt, but the lack of acknowledgement for you. Respect is far more about presence than fake formalities.

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Another way we can view respect is by being present in conversations and not wasting the other person's time. It is about understanding that everyone has a busy schedule and creating time to be with you means you have to reciprocate back with you being available and not keeping them waiting. It's about respecting and appreciating their opinions and perspectives even when they differ from your own.

Aside from being in such a situation where my opinions have been trashed away, I have found myself in a disrespectful manner unknowingly. Maybe I was so absorbed in my own thoughts that I failed to give regard to someone else's opinions making me not listen attentively or dismiss their feelings in a rush to get my point across. In retrospect, those moments taught me a great lesson about the importance of being mindful in my interactions with other people so I don't hurt their feelings.

I realised that respect isn't a passive trait. It requires one's effort and being intentional about their actions. It's about creating time and choosing to engage with people in the most meaningful way even when you don't necessarily understand their perspectives or agree with them.

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In a cultural setting, we must understand that respect varies. Respect doesn't look the same way for everyone. For some, they believe that respect is when you address them using titles or honorifics, while others view respect in how you listen and respond to them. When we understand this, it would be easier to move from surface-level politeness to a more genuine form of respect.

To wrap this post up, it is essential to recognize that respect is reciprocal. The way you treat others is the same way you will be treated. True respect lies in the way we give value to other people, make them feel seen and heard, treat them and care for them in meaningful ways, and not show disregard or contempt for anyone.

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