Amaka got pregnant the first time and lost her baby, she and her husband decided to try again and the same thing happened. Her mother in-law and her sister in-law blamed it on her saying it was her fault that she was losing the babies, in fact, her sister in-law said she donated the babies in her witch coven.
You should not be surprised! if you are from South-West Nigeria, hearing that a woman donated her fetus to her coven is one myth you should be familiar with by now (Myth or Real I do not know because I do not have a first hand experience neither have I seen with evidence anyone who has been able to proof when they were donating theirs, so it is still a myth for me).
Amaka and her husband decided to try one more time and they finally gave birth to triplet and the family was happy because Amaka now has a child, and her sister in-law is 19 weeks pregnant but unfortunately, her sister in-law lost her pregnancy at 20 weeks so; would Amaka say it is her sister in-law's fault, or did she also donate her child? We have a lot of misinformation about miscarriages or we can say we believe a lot of myths but first, what is miscarriage?
The unexpected ending of pregnancy within the first 20 weeks of gestation is what miscarriage is, and the person carrying the pregnancy doesn't have to do anything wrong to lose a pregnancy, also the death of the fetus can lead to a miscarriage and it is important to know that most miscarriages are beyond the control of the carrier (mother) and you see, the first thing I will like to say is that miscarriages are not rare. Unlike the made belief that it is rare, miscarriages aren't rare (so the donation to a witch coven because it is rare is a lie). It is better we begin to talk about this so people know that it is a normal event so the stigma, shame, regret, and accusing fingers pointed to people can be reduced especially in third world and developing countries.
You see pointing fingers on the mother when a miscarriage occurs is wrong as the miscarriage could occur as a result of wrongful carrying of the baby in the womb or in most early cases of miscarriage, chromosomal abnormalities leading to unhealthy fetus which would definitely lead to miscarriage. Still on pointing fingers on women; it should be clear that having multiple miscarriages doesn't mean a woman is infertile, in fact she can still put to bed after 2 or more miscarriages but it is advisable that when a woman has more than 1 miscarriage, she visits a fetal medicine expert who will help through the pregnancy journey.
Miscarriages caused by physical or emotional stress is another myth because pregnancy itself is a very stressful period. Note that carrying heavy load can lead to miscarriage, I am not talking about excessive stress to the body that would put pressure and impact on the fetus, I am talking about simple physical and emotional stress and once a person has a miscarriage, the recommended time to try again is within 3 months to 6 months (WHO) so as to help the womb heal and this is contrary to the 1 year space you hear a lot of people mention.
Some people would say it is better not to share a miscarriage ordeal with another person, but this is a complete lie. Miscarriages are heavy pressure on the mind of the mother, and she can share with anyone she feels comfortable with to share. Keeping it to oneself can lead to post miscarriage conditions from thoughts and depression such as PTSD, Anxiety, and Grief. Women who experience miscarriages need all the support in the world to stay in good health mentally.
Reference
https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/miscarriage/
https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/pregnancy/miscarriage
https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/miscarriage/causes/
https://www.msdmanuals.com/home/women-s-health-issues/early-pregnancy-disorders/miscarriage
https://reference.medscape.com/article/266317-overview?form=fpf
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30422585/
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/33915094/
https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/how-much-stress-is-too-much-when-pregnant
