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Keep on walking, the mountainous range is tough, make sure you don't stop walking or you could die. Death, is that the real reason why I'm walking? No, I realized the reason why I'm walking is because I needed to add distance between me and her. Which is ironic because the fights were because of the distance we already had in the relationship. At least I know without her here as I'm walking I won't beat her, God forbid I'll be that kind of man again. So even if my foot hurts and I'm tired I'll keep taking that one more step.
I remember when it first started, I just got out of prison for domestic violence and I was dedicated in turning a new leaf. I met her at a bar in a moment of weakness, she seemed so small and out of place in such a rowdy place. Until an unsuspecting victim tried grabbing her and got a hot poke through his hand. That's when I knew I had to talk to her. With some very careful planning, I decided to approach. Coming from her front I managed to sit in the stool next to her. We actually hit it off and fast-forward to 3 years later we tied the knot.
We were so close yet so far, I knew that I was suppressing my violent instincts at my bad days, seemed she noticed it too. I hated the fact of knowing that I was a bomb waiting to blow off, and I hated my selfishness for hiding that aspect just to get her to marry me. After the wedding we started arguing in the first year. Like all bad things in life it started small; who was meant to take out the trash or who was meant to wash the dishes till it graduated to screaming at night why I'm home late or why I don't want to work on the fact that the chasm between us getting even wider.
The bottom point was one single night, I was tired. A long day, afternoon and evening. I was enjoying the calm in the night road as I'm driving to the storm at home. As I got to my driveway I saw the light on and I knew what to expect taking a deep breath I knocked and entered the storm. It was too much, I couldn't take it anymore and I did the one thing I swore I wouldn't do; I hit her. That's when I did the second most painful thing i could do, I distanced myself.
I went on different travel's job, jobs not meant for married men. Jobs that you could spend up to 5 months abroad. That was the best thing i could do for her, at least I thought that was the best thing.
I took another step closer to the summit, closer to the alleged hideout of my present criminal. Twinkle Toes: hideout, crook, arms dealer and philosophist. The last part of his folder really made me chuckle, one of the worst criminal and all round bad guy is a philosophist. "I'm noticing a whole lot of irony today."
At the summit I saw a small hut with a trail of smoke coming out. It was a good 100ft across, with no cover in sight. Same way no visible traps seen. "Pretty carefree for an arms dealer/ wanted convict." I recoiled at hearing the sound of a different voice. Then I realized that I had 5 men with me on this mission they looked at me with no emotion in their eyes, guess I'm distant to them too. I put on my camouflage and signaled the crawl to his house.
Breaking down his door, I saw him sitting on a chair with an odd smile. " I wish you would've knocked Inspector, the door wasn't even locked." I looked into the room, checking for any other person and potential weapons.
"No need checking, I mean you no harm." he said lounging on the chair. This doesn't make sense, he's meant to be one of the worst criminals in the world, now he's sitting in a warm barely furnished hut, with a fire roaming.
"You don't talk much do you? Nevertheless I've been expecting you." I trained my gun at him. "Expecting me how? What do you know about me?"
Smiling he said "I tend to make it a hobby to know as much about every officer on my case as possible. So I do know about you Jonah Brandy, actually I knew you before you became an officer. I knew you from prison." I looked at him and I remembered, I remembered the small bunkmate in cell that helped me get through the worst nights. The person that thought me my mantra "One more step".
He chuckled at my dropped jaw from hearing the shocking revelation "Thomas, what happened to you?"
"Bahh I'm a lost cause, it's best to talk about you." He smiled so genuinely you wouldn't realize this was the same man that funded the biggest terrorist organisation in the world.
"Pshhhh..... Sir how do you read, is the target in the building." My com sounded, I moved to answer but Thomas stopped me and pressed a button. A voice sounded from my com "Affirmative, target in sight, cover all exits about to engage and try apprehending the convict."
"We have 10 minutes before your squad gets suspicious, let's start." I smiled at him inviting me for a sit. Another irony for today is me a FED about to get advice from the man I'm about to arrest.
I settled down but still held my gun towards him and he began, "How's Paula?" I froze at the question, how did he know? Was it just coincidence, regaining myself I answered "She's fine". He observed me with scrutinizing eyes. "You know I hate therapy sessions where my patients aren't honest. I'll rephrase the question, 'how're you and Paula?'" I looked at him, my temper building, I replied a bit too high. "She's fine", "Are you fine though?" he countered.
That broke me, I cried, here was I bawling my eyes out in front of an ex-psychologist, present criminal and future convict.
"I did it again Thomas.The one thing I swore I won't do, I did it again. I hit her, I don't know what to do, we're so distant now. I haven't seen her in 5 months." He sighed and asked, you've been doing what I told you? "Yes, the One More Step belief, and it had been working, but once I hit her everything changed." He came closer to me and hugged me. I didn't even remember I was holding my gun. "Let me tell you the meaning behind that phrase 'One More Step'. I brought it up before I came to prison, I was wrongly accused but without any proof I couldn't defend myself. So I chose the phrase, One More Step. One more step to freedom, One more step to money, One more step to revenge. I'll have you know that I did infact accomplish all those things, but I lost my soul on the process, heck the man who wronged me didn't even remember who I was when I did him in."
"At the end of it all I was feeling so empty inside. Accomplishing all of my goals, I thought what would I take One more step for anymore? What distance am I trying to close?
One day I was walking in the park and I met an old man who changed everything for me. He was sitting at my favorite bench at that park so I sat next to him. He seemed like a wise man so I told him my crisis always knowing I could easily off him if he decided to blab. After hearing my tale this man asked me a single question. 'What's the most important step a man could take?' I pondered on this for a while, heck I pondered on it for two good years. When I came across the answer I went back to the park to find the man but he wasn't there. It seemed he had passed on."
"So what was it Thomas? What's the most important step a man could take?"
"Well me just telling you the answer isn't how the world works amigo." He said laughing and standing up." As I saw he was dead. I took a break from the life of crime and studied philosophy that's where I realized I was wrong in my answer, I was way off. For I thought the most important step was the first step but it's actually the next step. Turns out the man was a famous philosophist that wrote a book called One more step and that's where I got my phrase from. To think I was using such a thoughtful phrase without understanding the true meaning of it." An alarm beeped "Well Jonah it seems your session is over. I have a lasting word for you, you've been taking one more step away why not take one more step towards and close the distance. I think Paula would appreciate that even more." Before I could reply he shot himself with my gun.
Driving towards my house I'm thinking of what Thomas told me. It's been nearly 2 months since he died and I just decided to call Paula. She seemed surprised to get a call from me and I was surprised she picked. Reaching the door I remembered the dread I used to feel before opening this door at night. As I opened the door I saw her, beautiful as always with her silver hair in a single plait to her side. I made to hug her but she resisted asking "What happened? What changed? Why call me now when you've been so distant since that night." Tears were forming in her eyes . I knelt down and kissed her replying "I'm sorry for all the hurt I've caused you, and for the distance don't worry, I hope with this kiss I've taken my first step to closing the distance and I plan to keep on taking one more step."
