LOLZ Weekly Joke Challenge - Week 7 - Help Build A Hive Based Joke Database and Earn $LOLZ

in #lolz3 years ago

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Week 6 Of the LOLZ Joke Challenge Is Here

Welcome to our weekly LOLZ Joke Challenge where you can share a joke you know and help us build our joke database for use with the LOLZ token.

Sorry we were a bit quite last week as we were dealing with some IT issues that were giving us a good fight. But we worked through them and are back on track.

Last week's Challenge was a great success and we added over 30 jokes to our LOLZ Community joke database. A special shoutout to @marshmellowman for bringing it. We will be getting those added and in the mix today.

So on to this weeks challenge!

The Tasks

  • Tell us a joke in the comments. 1 LOLZ
  • Re-blog this post, and tell us you did in the comments. 1 LOLZ
  • Tag a friend. 1 LOLZ

You don't need to upvote this post, but it wwould be much appreciated. All earnings will be staked to increase the curation value of the @lolzbot.

All rewards will be distributed via the LOLZ dropbot in the comments so be sure to leave a comment even if you only re-blogged the post and don't feel like telling a joke.

If we select your joke to include in the database, we will reward you with an additional 5 $LOLZ, and include you as the source for the joke (unless you prefer to be anonymous). Post as many jokes as you like, and earn an additional 5 $LOLZ for each joke selected for inclusion.

What We Are Looking For

Any joke can be posted and earn an $LOLZ, although we ask that you stay Safe For Work.

To be selected for inclusion in our database, your joke will need to be -

  • Clean. LOLZ is kid friendly. Please, no dirty, racial, or potty humor.
  • Short. We prefer jokes with short setups and punch lines.
  • Funny! Or at least Punny.

Your joke does not to be original. Any joke you know will do.

Lets get this party started!

Come on people... MAKE US LAUGH!

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About the LOLZ Project

LOLZ Project is an engagement project with the mission of spreading laughter and joy on the Hive blockchain. Hive users can use the !LOL or !LOLZ command in comments to share a clean joke and tip the author an $LOLZ token.

Help Support the LOLZ Project

Here are a few ways you can help the LOLZ Project.

  • Use the !LOL and !LOLZ command often to tip fellow Hive authors.
  • Upvote and re-Hive our posts. All rewards will be used to help cover server costs and increase curation value.
  • If one of our jokes makes you smile, consider giving it an upvote.
  • Follow @lolztoken and participate in our airdrops, contests, and giveaways.
Sort:  

This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

Right now, don't have any joke to share bt we always share wen I discover one... just reblogged.... I love to laugh and glad to join the community

We are so glad to have you! !LOLZ !DROPLOLZ 2

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@pro-elina - You received a 2.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

I used to be addicted to soap
but now I'm clean.

Credit: lofone
@pro-elina, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (6/10)

I slept off right here last night with my shoe off.
And I couldn't find my left hand shoe...
Is there anyone that help me find it?
LOLz

I wasn’t originally going to get a brain transplant
but then I changed my mind.

Credit: marshmellowman
@dansabest9, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (2/10)

What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie? Sofishticated.

Got that one too.

I am so much addicted to hive that i mistake the messages to WhatsApp

Reblogged!

Thanks for the !LOLZ

What is black and white and red all over?
A penguin with a sunburn.

Credit: captaincryptic
@emeka4, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (5/10)

And a quick one that I read recently:
How do flat-earthers travel? On a plane.

!LOLZ !DROPLOLZ 5 more!

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@manuvert - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

My doctor said he could help me stop dreaming of cows playing football
I asked him to wait till after finals.

Credit: adedayoolumide
@manuvert, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (8/10)

Why do Swedish ships have bar codes on them? So they can scan da navy in.

I reblogged :)

That is great. Just what we are looking for! !DROPLOLZ 7

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@luthien12 - You received a 7.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

How does a taco say grace? Lettuce pray.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

What did the fisherman say to the magician?
“Pick a cod, any cod.”

Reblogged!

Hey.. sorry I somehow missed this! Added! !DROPLOLZ 7

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@belhaven14 - You received a 7.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

There is usually only a limited amount of damage that can be done by dull or stupid people. For creating a truly monumental disaster, you need people with high IQs. - Thomas Sowell

Reblogged

Sorry I missed this earlier... !DROPLOLZ 2

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@quotes-haven - You received a 2.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

Thanks! I appreciate that. 😊

I don't trust those trees. They seem kind of shady.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

What do a tick and the Eiffel Tower have in common? They're both Paris sites.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it.

What is the last joke that will ever be told?
I'mageddonit!

Sorry I missed this earlier... !!DROPLOLZ 6

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@networkallstar - You received a 6.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

I can't believe I keep on looking for my phone for almost 1 hour, only to find out that the phone is in my hand

I reblog you, but... I can't say a joke 😞
But i love laughing with you! 😂

@uggya come here with me!

Thanks so much... !DROPLOLZ 4

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@coccodema - You received a 4.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

manco fossimo nella fontana di trevi come nella dolce vita! mi sento un po' Mastroianni!

What does a bee use to brush its hair? A honeycomb!

Here are !DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

How many out of this list were original?

A buddy is the joke king, he made me a list, all things he and i have picked up from here of there... but he not on hive.... like i say in all of my work, nothing is original and if you have invented the words and language then you can take credit for it all. Otherwise we are all sharing the building process.

Smoking will kill you… Bacon will kill you… And yet, smoking bacon will cure it.

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

Why don't eggs tell jokes?
They'd crack each other up.

Credit: gillianpearce
@marshmellowman, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (11/10)

I have a joke about chemistry, but I don't think it will get a reaction.

!DROPLOLZ5

!DROPLOLZ 5 oops... that didn't go thru

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

A gentleman goes to the house of a fortune teller, as soon as he arrives he knocks on the door and the fortune-teller asks "Who is it?" And the gentleman exclaims: "Let's start well ...".

@lozio71
@coccodema
@uggya
!LOLZ
!PGM
!LUV

REBLOG IT!:)

Idea simpatica... vale la pena provare... grazie per il tag @blumela

Thanks for the !LOL. I'm going to give you the full reward of 5 LOLZ for this contribution, but will edit it down a bit to something like @crrdlx suggested below. !DROPLOLZ 8

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@blumela - You received a 8.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

Two men stole a calender
They each got six months.

Credit: vcclothing
@blumela, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (3/10)

@blumela(2/4) gave you LUV. H-E tools | connect | <><

The first time I got a universal remote control I thought to myself
This changes everything.

Credit: marshmellowman
@lolztoken, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @blumela
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (2/6)

Sent 0.1 PGM tokens to @lolztoken

remaining commands 0

Buy and stake 10 PGM token to send 0.1 PGM per day,
100 PGM token to send 0.1 PGM three times per day
500 to send and receive 0.1 PGM five times per day
1000 to send and receive 0.1 PGM ten times per day

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Discord image.png

Support the curation account with a delegation 10 HP - 50 HP - 100 HP - 500 HP - 1000 HP

Do not spell part backwards. It’s a trap.

The person who invented knock knock jokes should get a no bell prize.

Why do bees hum? They don’t remember the lyrics!

My math teacher called me average — it’s so mean!

I'm a math geek so bonus points.... !DROPLOLZ 7

!PIZZA

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 7.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

Man goes to fortune teller's door, "Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Nevermind."

Spin-off from joke by @blumela :)

I used to be addicted to soap
but now I'm clean.

Credit: lofone
@crrdlx, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @blumela
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (4/6)

Thanks for the !LOLZ. I'm going to give you partial credit since you editted @blumela's joke. !DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@crrdlx - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

I used to be addicted to soap
but now I'm clean.

Credit: lofone
@crrdlx, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (4/10)

What a little mermaid does at the bottom of the sea? She plays with a whale XD
@atnazo
@skgcrypto

Hahaha. Thanks for the !LOLZ. !DROPLOLZ 2

Why do math teacher have so many babies?
Because they know how to multiply.

Credit: theabsolute
@bokica80, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (10/10)

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@bokica80 - You received a 2.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

The future, the present and the past walked into a bar. Things got a little tense.

What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.

My buddy uses that one all the time. !DROPLOLZ 5

!HIVEBITS

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

Thanks for explaining the word “many” to me, it means a lot.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He didn’t get hurt
because it was a soft drink.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

Whenever I lose my TV controller, I always find it at a remote location

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

I’m skeptical of anyone who tells me they do yoga every day — that’s a bit of a stretch.

Similar to one I sent a few weeks ago:
What do you call bears with no ears? B.

Reblogged
Keep on laughing!
!LUV

!LOLZ took me a second... but that's good. !DROPLOLZ 7

Thanks a bunch! Like I often say, the dumber, the better! Well, for jokes anyways...

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@manuvert - You received a 7.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

The person who invented autocorrect
should burn in hello.

Credit: marshmellowman
@manuvert, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (7/10)

@manuvert(1/1) gave you LUV. H-E tools | connect | <><

I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don't know y.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

How do you get a squirrel to like you? Act like a nut.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

The other day I asked the banker to check my balance, so she pushed me.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

When everything is coming your way — you’re in the wrong lane.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

!BEER


Hey @lolztoken, here is a little bit of BEER from @marshmellowman for you. Enjoy it!

Learn how to earn FREE BEER each day by staking your BEER.

I was trying to explain the little investments and savings my client had but she didn't have much interest.

Reblogged and tagging @steemmatt

Thanks for this joke. I somehow didn't see all of these so am WAY behind on accepting them. Please accept my apologies and these late !DROPLOLZ 9

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@theabsolute - You received a 9.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

Thanks

I’ve just reblogged and here’s my entry:

I’ve got a barrister friend with a cool accent. He doesn’t know much about the law but he makes a great cappuccino.

Got any jokes @killerwot?

!LOLZ.. thanks for the laugh. !DROPLOLZ 7

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@elementm - You received a 7.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

Thanks, that IS better than a kick in the teeth! 😁

Don’t you hate it when someone answers their own questions?
I do.

Credit: marshmellowman
@elementm, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (9/10)

I was wrecking my head trying to think of jokes, it's one of those things when someone asks me, I go blank.

No pressure 😅! Besides, this is a weekly thing so whenever one comes to you, you'll still have a shot 👍

I was addicted to the hokey pokey… but thankfully, I turned myself around.

Have heard that one.. but !DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

What concert costs just 45 cents? 50 Cent featuring Nickelback!

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

Where there’s a will, there’s a relative.

I hate Russian dolls
they’re so full of themselves.

Credit: marshmellowman
@marshmellowman, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (10/10)

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

Keep the dream alive — hit your snooze button.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

PIZZA! PIZZA!

PIZZA Holders sent $PIZZA tips in this post's comments:
@marshmellowman(2/15) tipped @lolztoken (x2)

Join us in Discord!

What time is it when a buffalo sits in your car? Time to get a new car.

Hey.. sorry I somehow missed this! Added! !DROPLOLZ 6

No problem. I will get some buffalo jokes in this database at one point or another.

Thank you for the response, I see the !LUV and appreciate it 😀

@buffalobison(1/1) gave you LUV. H-E tools | connect | <><

Given the current emission rate of LUV pushing 500/day, increases to required LUV levels will likely be forthcoming.

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@buffalobison - You received a 6.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

R.I.P boiled water. You will be mist.

Already have that one.

!WINEX


Congratulations, @marshmellowman You Successfully Shared 0.100 WINEX With @lolztoken.
You Earned 0.100 WINEX As Curation Reward.
You Utilized 1/1 Successful Calls.

wine_logo


Contact Us : WINEX Token Discord Channel
WINEX Current Market Price : 0.390


Swap Your Hive <=> Swap.Hive With Industry Lowest Fee (0.1%) : Click This Link
Read Latest Updates Or Contact Us

At what age is it appropriate to tell my dog that he’s adopted?

How does the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

Why don't eggs tell jokes? They'd crack each other up.

Already got that one.

!PGM

Sent 0.1 PGM tokens to @lolztoken

remaining commands 0

Buy and stake 10 PGM token to send 0.1 PGM per day,
100 PGM token to send 0.1 PGM three times per day
500 to send and receive 0.1 PGM five times per day
1000 to send and receive 0.1 PGM ten times per day

image.png
Discord image.png

Support the curation account with a delegation 10 HP - 50 HP - 100 HP - 500 HP - 1000 HP

Why can't a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

Hear about the new restaurant called Karma?

There’s no menu: You get what you deserve.

@mad-runner
@libertycrypto27
@zottone444
@stefano.massari

Reblogged!

Ok, that is awesome. I would probably be served cold cat food at this restaurant! !DROPLOLZ 8

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@lozio71 - You received a 8.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

Not sure this makes sense, but Google translate says I wanted to say...

Ich finde es toll, dass du den Token liebst

!LOLZ

What's green and sits in the corner?
A naughty frog.

Credit: fallingforward
@dragon-ti, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (11/10)

My doctor said he could help me stop dreaming of cows playing football
I asked him to wait till after finals.

Credit: adedayoolumide
@lolztoken, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @dragon-ti
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (1/1)

I doubt, therefore I might be.

Thanks for the shout out!
Ill keep them coming starting here:

I can’t believe I got fired from the calendar factory: all I did was take a day off!

Dude... you are in our zone. Pure !LOLZ gold! Thanks!

are any of these jokes worthy of some Lolz? gotta hustle to buy my buddy that coffee and get into the delegation pool.

Wow... I'm not sure what happened. I must have fallen asleep at the wheel. Yes, there are a bunch in there I will accept. I'm truely about to fall asleep at the wheel so I will go through them tomorrow. Here is an !LOLZ to add to your stake, and then I'll send you some more after I go through these and add them to the database.

Kool Kool i hope you do not crash behind that wheel.

!PIZZA !BEER !HIVEBITS

What do you say to comfort a friend who's struggling with grammar?
There, their, they're.

Credit: reddit
@marshmellowman, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (2/10)

Locked in, loving it. Looking forward to what you'all are building. We all need to laugh and this project does just that....and more!

I threw a boomarang a few years ago that never came back.
I now live in constant fear.

Credit: bulldog-joy
@marshmellowman, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (19/10)

I was wondering why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger, and then it hit me.

A baseball walks into a bar — the bartender throws it out.

I say to you a reverse joke.
Start laughing 😜

I reblog this

@blumela

Thanks for the laugh !LOLZ

I told the Starbuck's clerk my name was Marc with a C
When I got my coffee it was marked Clark.

Credit: lobaobh
@bencwarmer, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (2/10)

I saw a tall blonde walking past my window yesterday. I knew she was tall, because I live on the second floor.

@elementm not the best joke in the world but at least it's something haha

Thanks for this joke. I somehow didn't see all of these so am WAY behind on accepting them. Please accept my apologies and these late !DROPLOLZ 8

Hahahha I was wondering what Joke, thanks so much!

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@killerwot - You received a 8.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

It's a start lol!

Take a look @kikaso
Reblog it ^^

This guy said he was going to attack me with his guitar.
I said is that a fret?

Credit: reddit
@subidu, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of @lolztoken
Use the !LOL or !LOLZ command to share a joke and an $LOLZ. (9/10)

I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

I didn’t like my beard at first, but it grew on me.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

What do you call a cow with no legs.

Ground beef

@brian.rrr

Reblogged btw

Thanks for this joke. I somehow didn't see all of these so am WAY behind on accepting them. Please accept my apologies and these late !DROPLOLZ 9

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@teenagecrypto - You received a 9.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

How do you make 7 even? Take away the s.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

I recently decided to sell my vacuum cleaner — all it was doing was gathering dust.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.

The Man Who Created Autocorrect Has Died. Restaurant In Peace.

!DROPLOLZ 5

What is better than a kick in the teeth?
An LOLZ Airdrop!

@marshmellowman - You received a 5.0 $LOLZ airdrop.