Image by Misael Silvera from Pixabay
“One thing we don't have yet in Lofton County is a neglected suburb – and this is good because we are backwards enough!”
Thomas Stepforth Sr. was not happy on the phone, and his grandchildren Velma (11), Milton (9) and Gracie Trent (8) quietly tipped out of the door.
“It hits different when you realize that anybody he is talking to like that is counting money backwards, faster and faster,” Velma said.
“Ain't it the truth,” Gracie said. “I mean, at eight, counting money forward is interesting enough when people haven't figured out that dimes should be bigger than both pennies and nickels.”
“What I'm trying to figure out, still, is how people are lifting and fumbling bags with $11 billion in them,” Milton said, “but now I think I get it. Anyone sitting up arguing with a billionaire doesn't understand money gravity, and if your money gravity isn't working, the money is probably just floating away from you.”
“That's probably it,” Velma said. “Lofton County's money gravity is way, way off right now.”
“Are dimes actually bigger than pennies and nickels away from here?” Gracie said. “It would make a lot more sense if they were.”
“Okay, so, how bad are the problems really?” Milton said. “Hey, Vertran – you're a thousandaire – we need some help over here!
Nine-year-old Vertran Stepforth, cousin to the Trent siblings came running, and then solved the mystery.
“So, money gravity started running backwards in the South after the Civil War. That's why Enron and Worldcom were also down further south – see, ever since our ancestors went out free, nobody who used to depend on slaves had another plan.”
“So, basically, for Pop-Pop to be a billionaire, money gravity has been running backwards for a long, long time,” Velma said.
“No, although that's what people think,” Vertran said. “Pop-Pop figured out how to get it right, but there are only about 500 people who have on that level in the country. Now anybody can figure it out – you actually have to do stuff people want and need – but if you think you are always going to have people working for free to make you rich, and you're not going to stay up to date on what you offer, that's dangerous. You may slip gravity whenever people get tired of you or someone else does what you do better, or you just get sloppy and let people steal $11.5 billion from your bank.”
“Well, if everybody is doing everything for you, you might get really lazy after a while,” Velma said.
“Yeah, because if I had a coin counter, I would be so done with these dimes hiding behind pennies and nickels while being worth more, but, everybody gotta get their work done if you want to have something,” Gracie said.
“Yeah, because fumbling money bags because your money gravity is slipping is not it,” Milton said.
“Ain't it the truth,” Gracie said.
“Basically,” Velma said.
“Just a bad day's work,” Vertran said. “You just lose 11 of anything, and that's bad, but 11 billion? That's a bad day's work.”