You can't s choose how you look, if it were possible, a lot of us want to look better because the society is a scary place where people make selections of who looks better than the other - Ayegbusi Temitope
That was the quote I wrote 4 years ago when I was still chained to my own worries and realities. Who will appreciate me for who I am? Who would take me for the great being I'm becoming, is there possibilities where I am seen to be a bright kid than just a guy who have his hairline declined?
A few years ago, it was normal to enjoy life as a teenager when the internet isn't as wide as what it is now.
I remembered back in highschool, I was sitting with my other friends in class and our teacher was telling us more about "Hereditary" .
As we all know, I'm a replica of my parents, a slice from my father and the other slice from my mother. We can't choose what we want, we take what we are given.
Just in the class that very day my teacher made mention of baldness and everyone used me as a description. It felt like I was plagued because in a class of 30, I seem to be the only one with such hairline.
Well, I shrinked away from a lot of things, I would run away from any talk show, I would run away from anything that puts me before the public because I felt embarrassed to have a residing hairline.
I realized after graduation that I wasn't that bad, I saw a lot of people who also have residing hairlines and I felt safe and secured.
My classmates made me feel like I was the only one in the world.
More instances passed and I was able to create a safe zone for myself and the following things are what helped me gain back my confidence:
THESE WERE THE TWO KEY POINTS THAT RESTORED MY CONFIDENCE
- I focused on the things that mattered :
I was able to get the whole pattern to why people lose their confidence and one of it is focusing on the less important things.
I did focus on knowing better, I focused on value and building a skill and a business.
The shocking reality was that, I'm being praised for my skillset and knowledge and nobody is concerned if my hairline isn't good or not
When we choose to channel our strength to the things that matters , people will honor us for doing so.
- I accepted the things I couldn't change :
During my time of confusion, I would focus more on how to get myself cured even when I'm not plagued with a disease.
I thought it was a disease, well people made me think it was a disease so I did excessive researches just to ensure I bring back my hairline but I could not.
I stopped chasing what I can't control and left it alone. When you waste time correcting a mistake you didn't make, it will cost you more time and that is when you truly lost.
Me in that picture is just a me back into living a life of peace, I choose to wear what I want, look how I want and life really is fun with accepting what can't be changed and truly investing time on things that are valuable.
I would love to hear your side of the story. Have you ever had times when you tried to change what can't be changed?
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