When we are kids, for sure we have some dreams that we aspire to become in the future. But not all dreams are realized, more often than not it is stopped by everyone, especially within our circle.
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Most of us are afraid of failure, and fear is stopping us from following our dreams. But if we're going to live happy lives with no regrets, then we need to push ourselves to follow our dreams even if people try to stop us - we need to pursue them.
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Who is stopping you?
In the process of achieving your goals, you will have to deal with many obstacles. One of the main obstacles that are stopping you from reaching your dreams is everyone else. People around you can be your biggest fans or your greatest critics. You need to understand that each person has their own way of thinking and views about life.
When a person is trying to stop your dream, he/she could be doing it because they want what’s best for you in the long run but might not understand how important it is for you at this point in time.
More often than not, the closest to us are the ones who stop us from pursuing it.
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Why are they stopping you?
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- They don't want you to fail.
- Our loved ones are guilty of this. Our society celebrates winning over failures and most of the time people close to us want us to be protected from the heartbreaks of losing everything in the process. It is better to be in a safe zone rather than continue and step out to an unknown realm.
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- They don't think you can do it.
- People who knew us, know what we are capable of ( in some times ) when we present a grand plan or idea they will be judging us based on how we are doing in the said field at this moment. The idea of you improving in the process isn't there but rather they are stuck with the mindset that this is the only you can do.
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- They don't want to be disappointed.
- Dreams are good, but when not materialized it is depressing. In a typical Filipino household back then, the firstborn will be showered with responsibility and attention. Sometimes, the dream of pursuing anything lies with them and the parents are supporting it to achieve the goal. However, if for some reason such as unwanted pregnancies, being with the wrong set of friends, financial hardships, etc. Parents don't bank on nor protect themselves from being disappointed again they tend to limit their support to the other member of the family.
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- They don't want to be left behind when you pursue your dream, or they feel they will lose their friendship with you in the process of pursuing your dream (this is especially true if the person isn’t used to following through with anything).
When will you stop listening to them?
When you have a clear idea of what you want, it's much easier to say no to other people.
When you know what your goal is, it becomes much more obvious when someone is trying to steer you off course. They might be right, but if they're not helping you achieve your goals, then they aren't worth listening to either. Ignore the naysayers' man!
When everything else falls into place — the “why” and “how” parts of your plan — it's easier for people around you to understand why you need their help (or why they shouldn't be talking so much).
How can you motivate yourself?
There are a few simple things you can do that will help keep your dreams alive.
Set goals for yourself. This may seem obvious, but it's worth saying anyway!
Plan your day in advance and stick with it!
Get a coach or mentor who will help hold you accountable when things get tough!
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Where should you start today?
When you have a dream, it's easy to feel like you need to take on the whole thing immediately. That's why we often find ourselves feeling overwhelmed and stuck.
But if there is one thing I've learned about dreams and goals, it is that they can only be accomplished in small steps. If you want something big, then break it down into smaller parts so that each step feels manageable and gets you closer to where you want to be.
A big building should have its foundation first, if I will relate this in my blogging journey if I do want to become a better blogger, I need to study more and more about the topics that I am covering. Which I am doing in the past and still do now. Little by little you will be noticing the changes in how you write, the inspiration used, and how you interact with other people. You get better every day as you work with the craft!
Always start within yourself if no one believes in you that you can do it as long as your heart is in place continue on with what you do. It is good to be inspired by people's stories on the internet and know what they did but always remember that your story is way different than theirs and you cannot compare their achievement to yours. YOU ARE UNIQUE.
Being on the blogging side made me realize that support will never be available, especially from your friends and relatives. You will need to show your worth and if deemed worthy by them then you will get support, the audience is earned per se.
In the process of doing everything do not die
Tp
This post is again inspired by the Semi Safe Space Podcast, Episode 8: Of Naysayyers and Dreams which you can listen in Spotify.