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The ability to withstand to the situations that we thought would not happen means Resilience which would make us to adapt to changes and move forward in life. This is about how well you face challenges with courage and your mental capabilities rather than avoiding a challenge and coming back stronger. It involves mostly on our mindset, our habits and the support we get from the people who cares baout you.
Most important thing in building resilience is to accept the fact that the change is an inevitable truth and a constant in our life. Being in your comfort zone and not accepting the change you encounter is not a good thing. If you see that the changes in our life happens for a reason and accepts to improve them, then you are already half way through the change. First adopt to the changes and control and influence the things that you can do rather than coping with the things you can't change.
After dealing with the facts of the situations, you need to analyse the situation and give a chance to grow your mindset. Efforts should be made towards the growth of your mindset and learn to perseve the life in a different manner than you usually do. The chances of a fresh eye analysing a situation gives more ideas than hours of single period analysing. Try to see the changes as the chances to improve yourself instead of loathing in the situation. Please stop seeing the short inspirational speeches and put the efforts to make it happen. Getting inspiration from short videos doesn't last long.
Having a network of friends, family and professional friends has it's advantages. Try to talk to them and get a opinion on your situation. If you are alone then a simple google search would do the trick, because plenty of persons available online who are experienced with your situation. These trick might get you a fresh perspective of your situation and how to handle it well. Seeking the connection to handle the situation is a good thing and do good when others need it too.
Treat the challenge as a marathon, not like a sprint. Gain knowledge on the issue step by step and overcome the situation identifying the issue to generate possible solutions. Evaluate the situation and take action one by one like one step at a time and move forward to cross the challenge in a better way. These may be considered as the problem solving ability. Take example of british colonization, they didn't conquer your country in a day, it's a step by step conquering of simple areas leading to the whole country.
Being tough is not resilience, in fact think it as a human experience rather than a failure of your own. Try to recognise the suffering you went through and offer the same kindness when your friend is in the same trouble. Try to imagine yourself in their situation and try to help as much as you can. The balancing of emotional and logical side of you to better judgement. The acknowledgement of your emotions and go with the logical solution towards the challenge you got to deal with.
Be able to learn from the past and turn the tables upside down. You only possess the necessary tricks and knowledge on the situation you are facing, hence you are more qualified person to deal with your situation. Know when to quit the challenge and face the fact that the situation you are in not solvable. Not every failure teaches a lesson in your life, it's just a failure. Leave it behind and move on with your life. Learn to build on your past and improve your future.