ATTITUDINAL CHANGE THAT MUST ACCOMPANY A GENUIEN APOLOGY AND FORGIVENESS
I see the world as a small global village where we meet different people in different places resulting in our day to day activities. We often get help by people around us and we also tend to help others in whatever way we can, ranging from friends, colleague, family members and sometimes strangers.
All human efforts in providing the basic need of life such as food, health, and shelter can only be actualize by interacting with other people in the environment; but as a result of this interaction, we sometimes do things that stir anger and painful emotion to other, knowingly or unknowingly. This stirs in anger and painful emotion usually arise from what is consider to be wrong or offensive by another person or party .for this wrong to be corrected, the issue if apology and forgiveness must has a settled space in the mind of both parties or individual.
WHAT THEN IS APOLOGY?
Base on what I can practically understand about apology, it’s a strategic scenario where by an individual or group of people whom have offended another person or group and has realize that what was done is totally wrong and may has exerted a painful emotion towards them and they has come with remorse or regret and sometimes weeping for what they have done.
For example, a friend of mine who borrowed a pairs of shoe from me sometimes ago, that he is going for a two days convention, I wanted not to give him because it was a new shoe which I have not used before; but considering him as my friend I borrowed him the shoe.
But surprisingly, two days turn into two weeks, from two weeks to two months and before I could realize, the shoe has deformed and spoiled due to reckless use.
I was sincerely disappointed and also angry which made me to confront him to know why he has not brought back my shoes as promised?, he couldn’t defend himself and couldn’t say anything but only for him to kneel down and said; ‘my friend I am sorry,
I liked the shoes and I wanted it for myself but I could afford to buy it’. I was touched by his action and I forgive because I was able to buy another same shoes.
What is forgiveness?
I can say that forgiveness is letting go of the past, accepting apology from someone that has wronged you in the past.
One must be willing to forgive anyone whom has offended them in one way or the other because for you to obtain someone’s forgiveness, you should also be ready to forgive others too.
Apology and forgiveness work hand in hand because apology usually come from the one who committed the wrong doing and realize that what was done is wrong and he/she regret over he or her action and needs forgiveness from the other person.
For effective apology and forgiveness, there must be a positive change in attitude from both parties involved.
For instance, when you offend your boss at work by either coming late to work, and you apologize for that, and he forgives you. For that apology to be genuine you need to stop coming to work late, you also need to deviate from late coming attitude. And if you truly forgive someone for the wrong they did, you need to show them love, care for them and sometime cheers them up by putting a smile on your face. Embrace them and make peace with them.
You can’t forgive someone only for you to stop helping them when they need your help, and even stop greeting and talking with them.
THE IMPORTANCE OF APOLOGY AND FORGIVENESS
It restores relationship by promoting reconciliation between individuals.
genuine apology and a positive change in attitude strengthen forgiveness
It promotes peace.
It relieves anger and hatred for one another.
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