No one truly knows the pain;

in #hive-1538507 months ago

Every man has his secret sorrows which the world knows not; and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad.
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Hmmmm, I despise the word Depression. No one truly know what it truly means until they have felt what it means or it has happened to a close relative. Depression; I’ll do what ever it takes to keep it far away from myself after what I saw it did to my close friend, James.

This is not a fictional story or a ear say story

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I and James had been very close friends since I was in secondary school, he was someone I bonded so fast with. Our first discussion was about the cartoon x-men. I saw him reading the comic in a class alone, I share my opinion about some of the characters and since then we became very close friends. He was my senior but it was clear that he never had a friend like me in his class. We started visiting each other home, I got to know his family and he did mine.

His parent runs a primary school, and he was the only male child amongst the three kids his parent had. After his graduation, I visited him and we watch cartoon together. Shortly after his graduation, his dad passed away, it was a heartbreaking moment for the family. The young vibrant young boy I use to know became sad but that was only the beginning.

After the passing of his dad, the school shut down and his mom became sick. I really don’t know the whole story but his dad family were fighting over the properties that were left behind. His mom was chased out of their mom and she had to leave with her kids. I was the only one he could vent his frustration and anger too. The smile he always put on disappeared. After a while, I didn’t hear from my friend and all means to contact him failed.

Many months after, he visited me but this time around, it felt like a dark version of himself. We spoke for hours and he never smiled once so I decided to ask after his mom and sisters, James told me straight to my face that his mom passed away without any emotion showing on his face. I was shocked and I confronted “How come you didn’t even tell me this, you knew how close I was to your family” and the response he gave was what made me knew someone has been lost within my friend. He said “so my mom died, is that a news I should be sharing around with everyone I know?” He stood up and said he was going home.

James doesn’t even know or talk to people. It was that day I knew his pastor has taken him and his siblings into his home and was sheltering them. I started visiting him has his pastor place but he never spoke with me freely. James was so depressed he started falling sick and was diagnosed of asthma. He became a constant user of drug, he became someone that hated the opposite sex and always wish the worst on the earth.

There was no day I spent with James that I wouldn’t leave depressed too. He became someone that spoke harshly without caring what other might thing about him. At a point he became suicidal, he would just start talking about painless ways to die, about how nothing is in this world and how worthless it is to live. He dropped out from the university he was because he said he was unable to concentrate.



As the years goes on, I was still in contact with james, no matter the harsh and hateful words he said to me, I wouldn’t be angry and I would just smile and say things that would make him understand he can’t continue the way he is because he still has family who care about him. As time goes on, James began to change, he started talking freely but more consciously. The man that was always indoor, who never wanted to see the world started coming out to take some fresh air, he would take a stroll and the change started.

Currently, James is living fine. His big sis is in the UK and she’s married. She got him a remote job he could do to take care of his needs, he has a girlfriend and now we are more like brothers.

Although it took many years for him to get to the place he is now, and I would do anything to protect that peace he has found now. I have seen what depression can do to a person and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. It’s a very very bad state to be.

Thanks for reading.

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Depression is never a good experience, thank God for your friend James that he later recovered and is now doing fine.
We should do our best to not let depression get to us because it kills.

First of all, this is the infamous sholex of hive. Glad to see your comment.

Yeah, James story is just the one I know, there are many people that didn’t make it. Depression really kills

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Whenever it gets to a stage in one's life where the emotion of others doesn't matter due to the pains and frustration, depression is setting in. You would not see any good reason for living and wouldn't do the same for anyone else. It's gratifying that the problem didn't consume James.

The pain was so much for him to bear I guess. Although he was still very young when his dad die, they where chased out of their home and his mom dad, he became a dropped out.

At a point, his words hurts me when we speak cause he didn’t even care what I thought but I’m happy that he is better now.

There is a lot of untold depression stories men go through.

Yeah, some even end before it could be told. Some men bottle all this feelings inside and it eats them up

I fought this demon many time in my life, there are good days but it is always close by so I still fight it.

I’m sorry to hear that. Be strong ok, try not to fight alone.
I’m rooting for you, you’ll come out strong

I have to reject anti-depressants like Citalopram and Welbutrin because they don't make me feel much better, sometimes worse. I find hanging around happy people, eating proper meals, enough sleep and exercise perform better than the medication. But it's real tough now since losing my best friend to cancer 5 months ago.
My kids keep me going. My daily motivation.

I’m sorry about everything you have to go through. It’s really hard out there and the people who are still keeping it together are the people with the pinnacle of strength.
You’re doing well and you will get over it. I’m rooting for you.
Much love from me 🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽
!BBH

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But what James uncles did was wrong, some wicked village elders will sit and be waiting for their brother to die so they could inherit property.
Well, I am glad you never left his sight which shows true friendship. And I am also glad things worked back to normal for him.

I don’t even how how people will drive that in-law out of their brother home just to find peace living there.

Man hates his dad family and he has cut them all off.

I just know too much about everything I can’t say it all but at least he is getting better now. Just glad he didn’t run mental

Wow, I can't believe he survived all that, if this is not grace I don't know what else it could be. I guess he probably had something to hold unto because I have seen and heard of people with less painful experience committing suicide.

I'm just glad he has a fried like you to help him out.

Yeah, I have seen people do shit because they can’t pay school fee
Man had it rough immediately he finished secondary school. Though there are days he did crazy things I consider stop being friends with him but I’m still the only one he talk his feelings too. So I just had to hang in there and I’m very grateful that he overcame it all

Hmm! Depression is real!
Thank God James had a change of heart about any suicidal attempts, many do not think twice before taking their lives.

May we not be depressed 🙏

Amen o.
It was then i knew depression had stages. I have seen people talk about depression but I have never seen any that came close to that of my guy. He even became harsh to me at some points and his words where so hurtful but I just had to stay

I am so happy to read that James eventually survived the whole ordeal. There are not many that would survive after experiencing the kind of things he went through.

Depression is real, and is not something someone should wish for himself or another.

Yeah. I agree with you. Depression is real and people who knows about it won’t even want it for anyone

Yeah pain of depression is very dangerous.End of the day james is doing ok that's a relief. Good luck to james for his future life.

I’m also wishing him the best for the remaining days of his life. Depression really dealt with him mentally.

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Thank You