This is going to be a more positive post than some may expect.
I noted in an earlier blog that I had to stop taking a medication for depression due to an interaction with another medication I'm temporarily taking for chronic prostatitis. Thus, I'm currently only taking a couple of supplements which may have benefits for mental health but are unproven. It's now been about 3 weeks since I've stopped this medication, and I am... not doing all that badly.
Sure, I've had more down moments compared to when I was taking it. There were fleeting moments when I thought about suicide. However, they were just that - fleeting. I was able to push them away and move on.
I'm not always energetic and sometimes in a poor mood for no discernible reason. Outbursts of anger still take place when they shouldn't. However, they're definitely decreasing in frequency. I'm gradually taking control of my emotions so that they don't adversely affect my loves ones, who often bear the runt of my worst times.
A very positive sign was that I engaged in a hobby a few days ago. After some time not wanting to do so, I actually felt like doing it, and it was a great experience. The next few days, I didn't want to do it. However, today I again feel like continuing it. I accept that there will be fluctuations like this, and progress may not be completely linear, but as long as the overall progression trends towards the positive, this is all I can hope to achieve.
When I complete the interacting medication, I'm going to resume taking the medication I've been taking for depression. I know for a fact that I went downhill substantially after the last time I stopped it, hence I'd prefer to be on the safe side and not hold off altogether. That said, I'm going to attempt to take a reduced dosage.
On top of this, it's certainly worth continuing meditation, which I haven't been doing as much as I should lately. I have to keep reminding myself of this, and holding myself accountable, including when I post here. If there's one huge non-financial benefit of using Hive... this will be it for me. Accountability to those who waste their time reading my silly blogs.
Lets do this. 💪
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