Aircraft comedy

in #hive-1559862 years ago

Passenger: I'm sorry. How tall is this aircraft?
30,000 feet, according to the flight attendant.
Passenger: How wide is it, exactly?
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There's no need for concern, but we felt you should be aware that for the last three hours we've been flying without the use of radio, compass, radar, or navigational beam due to the breakdown of some crucial components, the captain's voice said over the large jet's loudspeaker in a clear, even tone.
This indicates that, in the broadest sense, we are disoriented and unsure of our current course. You'll be relieved to hear, though, that we're moving forward really quickly.
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When an airplane flew into a strong rainstorm, the sky began to wobble and bounce.
One particularly anxious woman, who just so happened to be seated next to a clergyman, appealed to him for solace.
She shouted, "Why can't you do something."
The reverend softly apologized to the lady. I work in sales, not management, you see.
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A man may now travel across the United States in eight hours, spending four hours flying and the other four getting to the airport.
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The airline corporation was alarmed by the high rate of accidents and made the decision to create a fully mechanical plane to do rid of human mistake.

“It may interest you to know that you are currently traveling in the first fully automated jet in the world, said a voice over the loudspeaker during the plane's inaugural flight. As a result, you can now sit back and unwind knowing that nothing could possible go wrong.

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