Overcoming challenges in my family.

in #hive-1538502 months ago


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  We still have two months before the end of the year. But Fall is already in here, no snow yet but our Thanksgiving in the country is next Monday and Halloween is also coming soon. Two tough challenges but finally I went through what I can consider a success. The first one was to try to be a single parent taking care of two kids for almost 20 days. And the other challenge was to help my oldest daughter overcome her fears and make her believe more in herself.


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  I think I mentioned not long ago that I had to take care of our home, including our kids when my wife had to travel for work for almost 20 days. It is challenging when you work and take care of kids without any support. That experience taught me how single parents who for some reason don't have their partner anymore have to deal with that 24/7 365 days a year. It is very challenging especially if you don't have grandparents or any other relatives living near you. The school schedule is tough for those who work here, the school is done at 3:30 pm and on Fridays at 11:45 am. I had to negotiate with my employer to work part-time at home, except on Fridays when I had to work fully at home. In addition, making the meals and lunch boxes is tricky when there isn't anyone else to help you. My wife came back and finally, I had someone to share the tasks and again we found the balance at home!

  The other challenge was also interesting. My daughter is growing from a little kid to someone more independent and it is very beautiful to see that. In the beginning of the year, she had many fears that were pretty challenging to overcome. She was in swimming classes but she was progressing very slowly and she was totally scared of the pool's diving board. Also, we had a challenge with riding the bicycle without training wheels. Last summer we bought a new bike without any training wheels and it was tough for her to be more confident. Well, she made it very well and she overcame her fears.

  When I thought that we would probably need to wait another summer to continue trying with the bicycle, she made it. She had already balanced she just needed more confidence to continue pedaling after starting. And about the diving board and swimming it was just a click that she needed in her head to move forward too. I was there to watch everything but as a witness only. After that, I told her that my happiness was to see her doing all these things by herself. And this year also was awesome that I could step back and let her read books by herself and also not interfere much with her homework, of course, I am always there if she needs but I am happy that she is becoming more independent.


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  Those experiences were interesting and with many roadblocks, but we could face it together as a family, it wasn't just a challenge for me. The experience gained in those two challenges made me grow a bit more and for sure my daughters also learned a bit and I am happy of that.


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  Ainda temos dois meses antes do fim do ano. Mas o outono já chegou, ainda não tem neve, mas nosso Dia de Ação de Graças no campo é na próxima segunda-feira e o Halloween também está chegando. Dois desafios difíceis, mas finalmente passei pelo que posso considerar um sucesso. O primeiro foi tentar ser uma mãe solteira cuidando de duas crianças por quase 20 dias. E o outro desafio foi ajudar minha filha mais velha a superar seus medos e fazê-la acreditar mais em si mesma.


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  Acho que mencionei há pouco tempo que tive que cuidar da nossa casa, incluindo nossos filhos, quando minha esposa teve que viajar a trabalho por quase 20 dias. É desafiador quando você trabalha e cuida de crianças sem nenhum apoio. Essa experiência me ensinou como pais solteiros que por algum motivo não têm mais seus parceiros têm que lidar com isso 24 horas por dia, 7 dias por semana, 365 dias por ano. É muito desafiador, especialmente se você não tem avós ou outros parentes morando perto de você. O horário escolar é difícil para quem trabalha aqui, a escola termina às 15h30 e às sextas-feiras às 11h45. Tive que negociar com meu empregador para trabalhar meio período em casa, exceto nas sextas-feiras, quando tinha que trabalhar totalmente em casa. Além disso, fazer as refeições e lancheiras é complicado quando não há mais ninguém para ajudar. Minha esposa voltou e, finalmente, eu tinha alguém para dividir as tarefas e novamente encontramos o equilíbrio em casa!

  O outro desafio também foi interessante. Minha filha está crescendo de uma criança pequena para alguém mais independente e é muito bonito ver isso. No começo do ano, ela tinha muitos medos que eram bem desafiadores de superar. Ela estava em aulas de natação, mas estava progredindo muito lentamente e estava com medo total do trampolim da piscina. Além disso, tivemos um desafio ao andar de bicicleta sem rodinhas. No verão passado, compramos uma bicicleta nova sem rodinhas e foi difícil para ela ficar mais confiante. Bem, ela se saiu muito bem e superou seus medos.

  Quando pensei que provavelmente precisaríamos esperar mais um verão para continuar tentando com a bicicleta, ela conseguiu. Ela já estava equilibrada, só precisava de mais confiança para continuar pedalando depois de começar. E sobre o trampolim e a natação, foi só um clique que ela precisava na cabeça para seguir em frente também. Eu estava lá para assistir a tudo, mas apenas como testemunha. Depois disso, disse a ela que minha felicidade era vê-la fazendo todas essas coisas sozinha. E este ano também foi incrível que eu pude dar um passo para trás e deixá-la ler livros sozinha e também não interferir muito em sua lição de casa, é claro, estou sempre lá se ela precisar, mas estou feliz que ela esteja se tornando mais independente.


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  Essas experiências foram interessantes e com muitos obstáculos, mas pudemos enfrentá-las juntos como uma família, não foi apenas um desafio para mim. A experiência adquirida nesses dois desafios me fez crescer um pouco mais e com certeza minhas filhas também aprenderam um pouco e estou feliz com isso.


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Foram dias e meses complicados, esse ano de 2024 não foi brinquedo para nós mano e imagino que ficar os 20 dias com as suas filhas foi bom pelo tempo q passou com elas, mas tenso porque ai ficou tudo em cima de você, de qualquer forma vivemos sempre tentando melhorar tudo para nós e torcendo por anos melhores!

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I know perfectly well what it is like, a long time ago I had to stay with my daughters, I was alone for about 4 months. My wife also had to go to work in another city, it was not easy for me and after that experience, you can not imagine how that helped me to understand all the work that my wife had, from there I help her much more in all the chores of the house.

In the city where I live I don't have any other relatives, it's just my wife, the girls and me, the good thing is that they had classes in the morning and I had to teach in the afternoon at the university, so I took her to the university, and they were happy about that.

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Yes it is the same in here! Our relatives live far away!!
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I really liked the way you tell how you educate your children on the blog, accompanying them and giving them tools for life, it is clear that you are a good man and I bet that if one day life allows it, I would like to talk to you while sitting drinking a coffee and philosophizing about life.

Educating children and accompanying them in this step from adolescence to maturity is a very challenging process. And also what you have had to go through being alone at home has tested your patience, but you have done it, so you deserve a medal (imagine that I give you one, because I can't find the medal emoticon haha)

Great publication.

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the medal is too see them as a healthy adult hehehe nothing is better than that!

Without a doubt, when we deal with fears when we are young, we grow up to be very confident adults! And of course, what better guide than our parents? Great article and experience.

Yeah my goal is that my kids grow up and become confident adults with their own life =)

school schedules are out of the real world here too, impossible for who works. Then they wonder why people don't make kids

I am not sure what they think about when do that lol! Thats why the perfect job is being a school teacher… huge amount of vacation and days off lol
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Parenting is not easy and specially when your have to take care of all alone. I have similar challange as we are expecting so it's more challenging for me to help my wife in the morning as this the time to goto office fore and school for my kid.
Its awesome to see how the kids performed and make us proud and I can that form you words.
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