For real, I have read a lot of posts on this and I kept going back to the original topic to see if I’m the one not understanding it properly. The question before us is, whose fault is it when a child misbehaves and commits a major infraction to the society? Just looking at this question I think the answer is obvious, for crying out loud this individual is still a child which means he or she is still under his or her parents surveillance. Nothing a child does was learnt in a day.
Wait, before jumping to conclusions, let’s take a critical look at things from different end. Now as a parent, it is expected that you are the wiser one and the more experienced in things as compared to your child or children. While as a child, it is expected that you are inquisitive about literally everything around you. As a couple, God was so merciful to you and blessed you with a child and obviously that comes with a lot of responsibilities which he has seen that you can do a good job.
Due to the pains and stress some mothers and even fathers went through having their children, they get blinded at the children’s mistakes and completely ignore some of their responsibilities to their children because they feel the pain they went through is too much to discipline their children when they do something wrong. Well, I’m afraid to break it to you but your child’s waywardness is way more than that pain you had during pregnancy or those years when you waited for a child. The society has so filled us with a lot of lies that unknowingly to us those lies have even become our truth and the truth our lies.
Training up a child begins from the moment you know as a mother that you have conceived. The baby might not be completely formed yet but trust me they can still learn a thing or two even at that stage but then, the bulk load starts when they finally come into this world. A child always seems like he or she is not aware of what’s going on around him or her but trust me, they are watching very closely than you can even imagine.
As a parent, you can only bring up a response child when you are disciplined yourself and not by just disciplining the child alone, you should always accept it when you are wrong so your children will know it is important to accept being wrong. Nowadays, in our society, we’ve seen so many parents tell their children what to do but you see them do completely opposite of what they tell their children to do. Their favorite words will be, it is who want to go bad that will get bad. Personally I disagree with that statement from every angle, children are learners, they are not sure of anything yet but they always want to show off what they’ve learnt as they believe that is what makes them become mature (and this thought is obviously not true but doesn’t stop them from thinking that way).
They always want to try everything they see or hear, especially from their parents because they believe they know better and they trust them that they won’t make mistakes. Well, this only depends on the parents effort in the kind of relationship they have with their children. As a parent, if your child finds it hard to come to you to ask questions, trust me it means they are getting their answers somewhere because it is part of them to always ask questions. In fact as parent, once you notice your child doesn’t ever come to you to ask questions, just know there is a problem and you are not doing a good job.
A child only ends up becoming a nuisance to the society when parents don’t do their jobs properly. Especially those parents that are fond of making the rules yet breaking them and also parents who believe that some children can never be good. No child is born with an already made character or behavior, they start developing their characters based on what they are told and what they see and it is the duty of the parents to develop the characters they know is best for their child because once they are older, there is little or nothing you can do.
So with this and many more that I didn’t mention, I’d love to say that parents are fully responsible for their child if he or she becomes a threat to the society (with very few exceptions) because as a parent especially the mother, you are supposed to be so close to your children to know when they are doing something wrong and correct them immediately, not in a way that tells them that you don’t make mistakes but in love. When a child always feels like they are wrong, they just grow up with the mind of doing anything they want because after all they always make mistakes.
As a child, I always try to avoid blaming my parents for my actions but that doesn’t mean they are not the reason I am who I am. I know a thousand and one things that would have been different if my parents didn’t make some decisions. I’m lucky to still be responsible to an extent but I know that some children would have ended differently if they were in similar situation as my siblings and I were. This is why there is a popular saying that, charity begins at home, whether or not the home is the major cause of a child’s behavior, it is the home that will be blamed because that is a child’s primary learning ground.
Thank you for reading to this point, feel free to say your mind, I always love reading about these topics and learn more about what everyone thinks and also debate, hehe.
