If there is no empathy, there is indifference in what the other feels, it invalidates you and is not ready to give you peace, it is not, and this applies to every bond.
Of course empathy is not so relative and we should not blame ourselves or feel bad, or feel very good or very bad when something happens to the other, I am totally unconditional, but that of putting myself in the shoes of the other 100%... Not all the time goes with me.
With the love of our life, everything depends, because yes, we are in tune, on the same sidewalk, by choice, not necessarily in everything, we know what to expect from the other, what he is and we are capable of, we know his virtues and weaknesses and also ours and we will never use them to harm him or us...that is maturity in the long-term love relationship.
It is also having the power to choose.
It depends on which stage of love we are talking about, being happy does not depend on another, it depends on a personal choice.
I don't know if you can love someone and it doesn't matter what happens to them, whether it's good or bad. I don't know if it's about being happy or suffering to the same extent as our partner, but about accompanying, validating, being there. In the same way to support, accompany, make containment in difficult moments, and live with everything the happy moments, that, then, from reciprocity.
I remember that...
A few years ago he made me lose myself in sadness, and guilt, so today I accompany him, the valid thing, and we talk about it, we can't stop being ourselves because we are a model couple.
Without a doubt, it hurts me more what they do to my husband, for example, than what they do to me 😂! I feel that I am stronger and not just anyone can hurt me. But if they attack someone I love ayyyyy. That for me is the love of the good because I value and support the one I love.
Drama and passion mature tolerance, respect, admiration, loyalty, complicity, intimate knowledge...
If you want to mature in any relationship and bond, no matter how old you are, you will have to understand that you cannot walk through life without assuming your mistakes and, above all, without the self-reflection that involves apologizing, correcting and amending the path.
January 2025 begins, and adversity is part of our life as a couple.
It is essential, the emotional validation, that accompaniment of the couple. I can tell you with certainty that personal strength is born of loving without harming, resisting without being submissive, and finding personal power in adversity.
To conclude, I can tell you that those who love me, who appreciate me and who value me, do not judge me. I don't have the power to change anyone, but I have absolute control over myself, so I stop giving my presence away to those who don't value it.
Janitze 🌹
Any images in this post are taken with my iPhone 12, the Infinix pro-note 30 or with the camera Rolleiflex 2.8 f, and edited with Canva
Separator made with Canva by @janitzearratia
Translation with |DeepL