APOLOGY : When To Say It.

in #thoughtfuldailypost2 years ago

Apologising when you are wrong is something that so many people lack, i have seen relationships break due to " i am right ".

Morally,it is important to apologise as apology saves situations, a simple I'm sorry can turn a difficult situation around.
Apologising shows responsibility, admitting you are wrong takes courage but it's definitely worth it, it speaks of your person. However,apologising is somehow intimidating to some but that is the first step in rebuilding trust. We shouldn't just apologise due to pressure, it should be sincere especially when you want to rebuild trust.

Mind you, people know when an apology is not genuine and it can ruin things. So, when apologising you should show empathy, remorse or even regret and mean what you say; that way everything goes back to normal. You wouldn't have to force a relationship to exist between you both.

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Image by mahbuhasan2550 on Pixabay
Another key and important aspect is knowing when to apologise. Some persons are so careless that they don't have a clue when something goes wrong, because they didn't intentionally do it. They feel reluctant to apologise or even feel there is no need for an apology but that is wrong in all sense.
When you notice that something is off about your friend,you should try as much as possible to find out what could be the cause. It might surprise you to know that you are actually the reason for the change in attitude. So not knowing you hurt someone close shouldn't be an excuse not to make things right.

So, if you notice that something you did or said hurt someone whether it was intentional or not, an apology is required of you.
When you apologise you don't have to shift blames;trying to rub it on the other person because you feel only you cannot be at the receiving end,you want the other person sharing the blame by all means.
It doesn't show smartness rather,it only reveals your kind of person and level of your understanding on how to deal and relate. Therefore,if there is anything you can do to fix the situation,do it. It doesn't make you less of a human.

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Image by free-stocks photos on pixabay

Do you know that when you apologise, the other person also feels the need to apologise? Apologising doesn't mean you are the only one who is wrong but at least you have done your own part. It is left for the other fellow to see a reason to apologise too.

Apologise if not for anything else, do it for your own sake- your peace of mind. In other to be free off guilt or at least to maintain integrity.
Not apologising when you are wrong can ruin your personal and professional relationship. It might even create room for enmity, grudges, anger amongst other things.

Most importantly,apologising even when you are not wrong is necessary and Godly in some cases. Because sometimes, our relationship with others is more important than being right. It might not be a case of who is right or wrong; it could just be a case of different perspectives.

To have a clearer understanding on how this works,sometimes,flip the coin and put yourself in the other person's shoes; you will understand better why that thing you said or thought means nothing, actually hurts the next person.

parents play a very pivotal role in the upbringing of children. Therefore, parents should make it a point of duty to inculcate the right values in their children both male and female . Males should not be left out. when it comes to moral upbringing. Most times, parents tend to focus more on the female gender leaving out the male children. Forgetting that one day those little kids will become adult and will live by what they have learnt from their parents in their early life. Parents, while reacting in an uncultured nature,remember your little angels and kings are directly learning from you and by defaults would practice what they have seen you do because you're their role model.

Family members are not left out,they should as much as possible avoid acting in a way that corrupts the mind of these little ones, a child in a home where the father never says sorry to the mother, will grow up thinking that is the way to go;after all,his Dad never says sorry to his mum, and verse versa.And if he eventually grows into an adult and in a relationship,he already has a picture of how his partner should behave, just like his mum. He expects her to fear him, obey his orders, never make suggestions or disagree with him, apologise any time something goes wrong . Whether it is her fault or not, and when that is not happening they begin to have issues.

The lady of course is from a different upbringing and has no idea what kind of woman he expects her to be and when she has done everything within her power to make him see reasons with her and he remains adamant, that is the breaking point. Everything begins to fall apart It just goes on and on like that except they retraces their steps and come to realize their mistakes.

Therefore a child's upbringing matters alot, it affects us either positively or negatively. If you are someone who hardly say sorry, you can start today. Make a change, write your wrongs. Say sorry as it melts the heart.

Once you apologise on something you did wrong, ensure you don't repeat the same error over again that shows genuineness and sincerity.
Move on when you apologise, don't dwell on the past, put it behind you, continuing to dwell or recall what happened will make it difficult to move on; thereby causing even more misunderstandings.

Nevertheless, there are times when saying sorry excessively becomes wrong, especially for women. We tend to say sorry a lot whether we are wrong or not, it is because we were taught so by the society. Sometimes the apologies are not real, we just say them to avoid confrontation, to stop someone from getting angry or even to hide the fact that we are angry ourselves. Some times,we just say it out of sense of duty, because that is what is expected.

You might have been in a controlling relationship were you just developed the habit as a form of self protection or defense but...
You need to apologise when you've done something wrong, not when somebody gets angry at you for no reason and because you are defenceless you just say sorry.
Don't say sorry just because you don't know what else to say, or because you don't want to start a fight. know what you are apologising for.

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